You are wonderful. I am grateful. (long)
Here I am when I first admitted to myself that I knew I needed help maintaining weight loss; when I knew, in my heart, that the future was not going to be good at the rate I was going. . . that I was doing my personal best to maintain and that I was slowly and steadily gaining my weight back one more time.
Here I am when my doc told me that my blood sugar was a concern having had gestational diabetes, having obesity run in the family, and that I needed to be "well" to avoid an early death (as our Mom had at age 59.) Her name was Eileen, by the way. You would have loved her! I think her spirit is here with us on OH. 
She would have benefitted from WLS!
Here I am when both my sisters, Lisajoy amd Debbie, scheduled WLS within weeks of one another without ME. I was both happy for them and scared. I also wondered If I had missed my dream boat within seconds. Inner turmoil. 
Here I am when I asked my sisters if they thought I would, eventually have WLS. . . Lisa said, "Yes." Debbie asked, "Well, how tall are you anyway?"
Did the math and realized I qualified NOW in Mexicali. 
Here I am doing hundreds of hours of fact-gathering, lurking, research. . . (I already knew, however, that if my sister Debbie had done it, it was OKAY. She's very smart that way.)
Here I am when I felt dependant on the outside for "approval of having WLS at a lower than usual BMI." This was an intense phase for me personally. It kept me up for many nights. Silly, but real. 
"They will hate me, judge me, for being so lazy! I SHOULD be able to get this weight under control. Just stop eating and start moooooving." (blah, blah, blah, blah)
Here I am when I found hundreds of others who have discovered WLS as a preventive tool, in adddition to a cure. If I know I need this, I do. Why wait to go up?
Here I am when I read all the "Wow Moments" out there. They resonate deeply within my soul and I rejoice from my toes (and usually cry). I feel the JOY of new beginnings never before imagined.
Here I am when I benefit from the acceptance out there from you. . . On some boards, the lower BMI's are treated poorly. In fact, a "creed" was drafted to protect them from criticism. I've had none of that. And I thank you. . . You probably remember knowing at a lower BMI that you were. . . . . . c o n c e r n e d? I am so grateful for this window of opportunity, my tax refund, my sisters, and this board!!
As I go to sleep tonight, the night before I fly for my WLS, I thank God for my sisters, Dr. Aceves, the wonderful folks that share their experiences and TONS of information online. I pray for all of you and celebrate with you, the excitement of realizing optimal health.
With lots of warmth and thanks,
Cindy
*THAT* was beautiful! I just want to give you all my love, support and prayers as you fly, have surgery and recover! Here's to you and your new life begining on Sat!!!!(which is my mom's bday!) Congrats Honey! Can't wait to hear that all is well and you are on your way back to us!!!! LOVE, PRAYER AND HUGS!
~Sandie~ -147!!WLS:12-12-06:Preop 268,Ht.5'4",BMI 44.9
Click on link to see my journey!!!
http://www.onetruemedia.com/my_shared?z=2bfaca5561a1d558fceb
87&utm_source=otm&utm_medium=text_url
"Do unto others as you'd have done to you"~ The Golden Rule to Live by!
You are what you EAT and WHO you hang out with! Choices=Outcome~ what's YOUR choice??
I'm not perfect but I am going to die trying!!!
You are awesome Cindy, and you're going to do so well with your tool! I can just tell.
Best wishes to you on your travels. Will be praying for you the whole time.
Godspeed,
Amy 
