Yesterday at work...

So... two weeks ago I was working and a guy I graduated with ( part of the popular crowd ) came in.  He had no idea who I was... I said hey we went to school together.  He said OOOOO whats your name?  Linda... he says OH my god do you look good!   WoW so on and so fourth. DIdnt mean alot cos hey Im the same person I used to be... But it did feel nice...  SO fast forward to yesterday, and low and behold hes back in.  Wow he says...I cant believe how great you look... TURN AROUND HE SAYS.  I said youll just have to use your imagination...  barf He goes on about how so and so is... people we went to high school with.. how he hasnt been into the bar scene and about getting older... they he says.... ahem YEA I WAS AT THE BAR A MONTH AGO AND SOME FAT HOG THOUGHT I WAS OLDER THAN 41, Now... in that second .. I wanted to say Hey I got somthing to show you.. and grab my bathing beauty shot ( before pic ) and let him feel like an ass... but I said nothing and ended the conversation. I dont feel bad that I didnt stand up for the fat people of the world by coming down on him... but I was also on the side of... he thought I was gonna bond with him on his shallow view of women and exactly what I felt when I would go out dancing at a bar and be so disregarded.  I KNEW they all thought that.. but to hear it was like... being a spy in a different world. Like that one article someone had posted awhile back. I was nothing before my surgery in the eyes of others.....no eye contact... gosh they might catch the fat disease or heaven forbid dont smile at a heavy woman she will want to jump you. Shame on him.. shame on men... ( sorry )   By the way hes 41 and never been married... big damn surprise...  Being thin now gives me such a knowledge... of both sides.. its humbled me and I would never go back. But I will never forget. Im still the same heart that was beating in me 140 pounds ago... the same smile.. humor... same feelings.  I guess now Im just easier to look at. Sad Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.  IM not man bashing so men dont flame.  I speak the truth. Signed  Just a smaller version of myself

What an ass!!!  He's lucky I wasn't there -- He would have gotten a V8 slap!!!  Good thing you didn't stand up for fat people -- you were at work and confronting customers isn't a good thing!!!  You should see if your class has a website and leave him a friendly message -- with pictures!!! We love you no matter what!!!  Your family loves you no matter what -- that is all that really matters!!! XXOO

Whan an ignorant pig that guy is! Too bad you couldn't spit in his coffee! lol

It is hard hearing people say things about MO or even just overweight people.  Especially when they don't know that was you and me and so many beautiful others.  I like to think of my time as obese as a blessing because I know to look at a person's heart and not their body in order to find their worth.  I would have missed out on knowing some of the most amazing people in my life if I judged by weight, plus I think of all the people that would have not been my friend if they judged me only by my weight. You showed class and maturity.  And you are so right-we are all the same person, just smaller versions. We still are hurt by rude comments like that and it shows how great your heart is that you can feel the pain that others have felt by him and others like him.  evil wish time... maybe as he ages he'll lose his hair (I don't know why men dread this so much-I love bald/balding me ) and he'll get fat and then some woman will say that to him.  I know, evil and bitter of me...sorry, but now it's out of my system... I feel a little sad for him because he will never truly know just how beautiful you are (not just your physical beauty, but your inner beauty). ~Debi

Don't feel anger toward him, feel sadness for him instead. He obviously doesn't value what truly matters about others and very likely suffers from feelings of insecurity for himself as well. You did say he was single, never married...correct? Good case in point right there. You, on the other hand, my dear....seem to have a beautiful relationship with a wonderful husband that has always loved you for what does matter about you. And you've gained a richness to life since WLS that matches your internal beauty with your external beauty. Now all people, not just those can look past the weight to see the heart of gold, can see your true beauty shining through and through. Unfortunately, this jerk's internal ugliness will NEVER come close to aligning with what the world perceives as his external beauty. And women he comes in contact with can obviously see through the facade - as you did in your connect with him. See....sadness, not anger.

I wasnt so much angry... more in awe.... he then went into his clean living due to being a jehova's witness. I dont need validation as much as I used to... seemed to be less as I got smaller.

Just... wow.... 

 

thanks my dear for your kind words and responding... Im gonna brave goodwill right now.

Im BORED!!!!!!!!!! Hugs sweetie

Great story, Linda.  Thanks for sharing.  Too bad, too sad about people who have such a narrow view of what women should look like.  I can't count the number of times I was told I'd look so good if i just lost some weight and that was when I weighed 150!  Why do people think they are right to even think those things, much less SAY them!  Sad commentary on a person who wears his religion on his sleeve, too.  Amazing the different aspects this journey gives us, isn't it?  Kathy

Linda, GOOD FOR YOU for taking the high road.  Nobody really wins an arguement. And AWESOME REPLY on his request that you turn around!  I hope I can think that fast if given the opportunity!!!

What a stupid idiot! NO wonder he is single, and never been married. He is not worth the air we breath. I have to say, being once fat, certainly does give me a different outlook on the world (and men).  Hugs, Lori

Hey Linda  Love the new Picture! you go!! Its really an interesting assumption that people have. I couldn't agree with you more about how people look at you as a thin person versus an obese person. I have had women be more friendly with me than when I was 375 and also people that knew me when I was 375 seemed to be more friendly once I got alot of the weight off its just their perception of obese people and that we are lazy people who can't control our lives and thats why we are fat! Besides not all men are asses!!!! Just some :)  Jim