what did I do

I am having a really bad couple days I don't know if I did the right thing.  I had my surgery on dec 13th and Have been home a couple days.  It really sucks when my family eats and I can't.  Now understand I am not hungry at all at any time of day food  to me food sounds so gross I struggle getting in a 1/4 cup of pudding the thought of it makes me sick.  I don't like feeling this way and I hope it gets better.  I am so sick of the strained cream soup and pudding and I still have at least 3 weeks left.  YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE  I don't want to feel like this I mean its nice not to feel hungry for once but I really miss my food does any of this make sense.  Good lord I just don't know if it's the texture no longer in my mouth of the food or what.  I guess I have to deal with it because it is to late to do anything  now.  I am happy I got to sleep on my right side last night and it didn't hurt.  I am gonna go shopping today with my friend to get my last minute stuff so we will see how that goes.  I have been totally off my pain meds since tues at 6.30 am so I think thats good.  anyway thanks to listen to me babble I think my hubby is sick of it but oh well.........Take care and thanks for listening!!!!    Marsha

Awwwwwwwwwwww Hugs Each and everyone one of us have been through the exact thing you are going through. Just pout it out...feel darn bad for yourself... look at your pictures and remember why you did this and it DOES get better. Honestly I promise...regrets are normal right now. Take one day at a time...do your time and know one day youll be happy you did this. Take care and pout all you want you deserve it!

Im sorry your so unhappy!  But hang in there!  There is light at the end of this tunnel.  Try not to think of the bad feelings.  I know thats easier said than done but you will snap out of this in no time.  THen you will look back and it will seem like a very short period of time.  I know I thought, "WHat the heck did I get myself in to?" or "Man its too late now!"  But I am 6 weeks out today and I am so happy with my decision!  I will keep you in my prayers!  Vent away, thats what we are here for!

Marsha I agree with the others. this too shall pass. Hang in there kid it gets so much better.

Hi, Marsha!  I know it feels really crappy  right now but as others have said...it will get better!   Pay attention to your body though and don't overdo.  You will be healing for awhile...it was major surgery, y'know!!!  Rest when you need to but don't forget to sip, sip, sip and walk, walk, walk!  Sounds like you are grieving for the food you can't have now...I think we have all been thru that, too!  You are NORMAL!!!  Having surgery around the holidays has got to be tuff.  I know it's been difficult for me to resist treats at the office, home, etc but I have given myself permission to have a bite or one cookie, etc., so I don't feel deprived and sabotogue myself!   Hang in there, Marsha!  You can do this!!   Jean

You are VERY normal. And for the 1st 3 months or so, food and liquids don't taste the same. You will be flushing hormones out of your system with the fat and that will do weird things, but in a relatively  short time you will be SO happy you did this. Try to remember to be patient and wait out the gloomies, I promise they will pass. And try to stay away from the family when they are eating, it will only make it worse and tempt you to eat solids sooner than you should.

Oh I SOOO remember what you're feeling.  I absolutely HATED the first 2 months after surgery.  I was on liquids and pureed for that long.  At about 6 weeks I decided I couldn't handle if anymore and tried eating chicken.  I cut it up into the tiniest bites and chewed, chewed, chewed.  It tasted SOOOO good.  I'm not recommending that you do that though unless you get approval from your doctor. Just know that this is probably the hardest parts because you're so limited in what you can eat and yes being around it all during the holidays can make it even more difficult.  Just make a decision every day that you won't let all the food porn bother you and that you will rise above it.  Say it out loud so you can committ yourself to it! Good luck, just remember that "normal" food days aren't really that far away! I'll be saying some prayers for you that your struggles get a little easier.

It does suck right now.  I just got through my liquids and pureeds, and life is soooo much better right now.  I had a few weeks where I hated the surgery, but I don't anymore.  My mom ate donuts and chicken nuggets and all that good garbage when I was first out of the hospital, missing food, missing eating.  That stuff smelled sooo good.  But it does get better.  I promise.  It is hard right now, go ahead and feel sorry for yourself, just try not to dwell on it.  I didn't understand how people could watch food porn during this period, because commercials could send me into raging cravings.  You will be able to eat again, and when you do, it is so much better than you remember it being.  Simple foods are awesome.  The cravings will stop, well, they won't be as frequent or as strong, and you get to where you almost don't realize they are there anymore.  Every week gets a little better.  And when you get to solids, you will sigh and say, "Man that sucked, but I made it and it was worth it."  Make sure you get a lot of variety in your fluids.  Popsicles probably saved my life, cause there were a few days where I almost couldnt' tolerate anything because I just felt so blah about it all. You can do it! 

Marsha...you are feeling the same as the rest of us have felt. It really does get better. Remember why you did this.  Hope tomorrow is a better day! Hugs, connie d    

Well from what I'm reading....ummmm, you are NORMAL!  It really will get better.  This is the place to ask questions and just vent.  We have all been there and will be there for you.  Know you are very new and part of your frustration is emotions from the anesthesia leaving your body, from the hormones flushing through your system.  Just think to yourself.  This too shall pass and before you know it, you'll be okay. Take care of you and keep us posted!