I'm so mad!! (sry - long)

Just got back to work from my supposed appointments this morning.  I received notification in the mail that my first appt with the coordinator and NUT were scheduled for today at 8 and 9 (no one ever called to schedule, just got the notice in the mail).

I was SO excited (if you post-ops can remember the overwhelming excitement of ANYTHING having to do with the surgery generating excitement and a feeling like you might actually be able to complete the process...).  So I get to the offices at 7:30 for the 8:00 appt (again with the excitement plus I'm normally an early to arrive person anyway).  I go into the building and the clinic checkin staff are extremely nice.  I see large chairs and there's special toilet thing for folks over 300lbs (I'm not, but through reading the boards, these are all things you're supposed to look for to show a considerate and respectful practice - right?). 

I get some brief paperwork to complete, but before I can even finish, I'm called into the exam room - even a minute before my appt is scheduled to begin - whoo hoo!  this is going to be great!!

Then I finish my paperwork, pick up a magazine and read all about style from Anne Hatteway.  Then I read a little more about style from various designers.  Then I take the quiz to determine whether I'm a "romantic" "naturalist", "sophisticate", etc.  (I'm none of these).  Then I look at my watch and it's 8:30.  I started the "be patient" mantra, not wanting to ruin the excellent experience this was going to be.  I played some solitaire on my phone...  Hmm - maybe I should change my ringtones...  I know, how about if I try and download some games for my kids...  hmm...  hmmm... I start opening drawers and cupboards in the exam room...  la la la...  

ok - it's not 8:50, there's no way I'm going to make my 9:00 appt if the coordinator doesn't get in here soon...  I leave the exam room and find someone walking around and ask whether they know if anyone's coming...  She scurries away to try find out what's happening....  I go back into the room and start wildly emailing everyone I had told about the appts telling them that no one is coming and the sympathy starts to roll in (everyone knows how excited (i.e., obsessed) I am with all of this...

Person comes in saying that they finally received a response to their several texts telling them that my appts were rescheduled for Sept 5.  Huh?  that's not right, they would hae called....  no?  Yup - says they left a message yesterday.  Huh?  no they didn't.  I get the scheduler/admin asst phone number. 

I leave the room, the clinic, the building - fuming.  I call the admin person and could barely control myself.  She said there was an emergency (i.e., one of the folks I was to meet with today couldn't do it, so she cancelled and rescheduled both of them for 9/5).  She also said she left me a msg.  NO, you didn't.  She pulls up the phone number she called and reads it to me.  WRONG NUMBER.  ARGH!!  They had mistyped in my home phone number.

Ok - I can get how that can happen so I try to calm down.  Then I asked that she make my primary contact number my work number and get ready to read that to her.  "Oh, you mean the 764-XXXX number?"  WTF!!!  If you had more than one number for a person and couldn't reach them at the first number (and had to make a last minute schedule change) wouldn't you TRY the other number????

ok (taking deep calming breaths)...  I keep hearing how the surgeon's and program are really good....  But if they are, how can they tolerate this type of support for their patients?? 

Back to deep calming breaths and building back my excitment for Sept 5....  

It's so hard when your entire life feels as if someone else is controlling things.  You are in the hardest stage of the surgery in my opinion. 

I know it's hard to believe right now, but everything happens for a reason.  I hated hearing that, but it was true. 

Try and keep your head up.  You will get through this.

Jenn

Keep taking those deep breaths.... I know how frustrating this can be.... I am sure it has been a long process and you are almost there.. Just remember that... It will all be done and over before you know it... I had somewhat of the same situation happen to be, but then at the end when it came to my surgery day, they called me and moved it up 2 weeks... I was so unprepared, but got things ready and it was my time for my surgery.... It really came up faster then I had expected... 

 

I know you are frustrated now, but just remember that it will all be worth it in the end.... Hope your next appointment goes much better for you.... Keep us posted.... You will be on the losers bench before you know it....

 

HUGS,

 

Hang in there!!  I tell most people that I think the pre-op part of this journey was the worse!!  You wait for appointments and then you have to wait on pins and needles for insurance.  I heard rumors that my surgeon was going to the other side of the state but the first I heard from him or the office was the morning of the surgery!  Like I said, I'd been hearing rumors and the office was not a pleasant place to be -- lot's of chaos and you could tell there was lots of tension.  I wouldn't do anything different though, surgeon was incredible and I've made the jouney across the state to do a check-up with him.  His partner is still in the office and is also great!  The office has seen probably 3-4 people leave and is running much smoother, I don't dread going there anymore.  Oh yeah, can't believe I forgot this one:  they tried to reschedule my surgery 5 days before I had it!  That was a hell of a message on my voicemail, lol.
With that said, rest assure that when it comes time to get cut you want the doctor that you feel the most comfortable with.  I can pretty much promise that you'll hear MOST surgeons and their staff are very available after surgery.  I know I called my doc on his cell on a Sunday at 7:30 p.m.!!  Hang in there through this!  I feel your pain and frustration, remember mine and I actually got a couple of laughs remembering all the b.s. of the hoops you have to jump through.  It's so very worth it!!!
--Sax

Thanks for all of your comments.  I know that this process is going to be difficult, but coming here to be able to vent is very helpful (as is hearing your similar stories).  Thx!


lara

Lara,  I truly can understand your anger and frustration.  I truly feel that the U of M program acts like it is doing all of us a major favor by letting us "regular" people in there.  They simply have very poor communication methods and act amazed when you are upset that "they forgot to call you"  or "lost the paperwork--again."

I feel that Dr. Finks and Dr. Birchmeier are good and Patti K the nutritionist is great.  The rest of their clinical staff has very poor customer service skills.

And the amazing thing about this is:  we can take our buisiness elsewhere!  I just don't think that U om M cares if we do or not.

Make sure you document all of this.  Wasn't it you that had contact with a patient advocate recently?  If it was, I could call them again with this latest issue.

It sucks that the program has gone down hill like this.  I loved the docs at the U, but the whole program needs to be good or it isn't worth it.

I know you're already invested in the program and don't want to go somewhere else and start over....and I don't blame you.  I just hope this is the last setback you have. 

The probelm is that so many people are desperate to have this surgery that if some are not satisfied and walk away they have plenty more to take their place.  I hope they get it together or enough people walk away to send them a message.

Brenda,  I really agree with you.  I think U of m has enough patients that if a few walk away-- so what?  I am the one that kept after them on a daily  basis about my appoinments and such.  I am also the one that called the patient advocate to try to get them to simply do their jobs.  What that earned me is a call from the U of m physchologist to my own psychologist.  U oM asked my pschologist if I had "anger managment issues"  and was I difficult to please. 

I simply don't know what it will take to get the program working in a manner that shows respect for us as people.  I also don't know who to complain to.  The people that are really in charge of the clinic are Dr. Finks and Dr. Birkmeir.  I wonder if they know how the clinic is run?

I used to be the bariatric coordinator there for 2 years till I found another job.  It truely breaks my heart knowing the program is acting like this.  Stay positive and on top of things...

"anger management issues" ??  I'd have had a fit! 


lara