Need Support...

Alright I am nearly 9 weeks post op and feeling like a failure. I don't think my weight loss has been as much as it should and need some advice. I exercise...I get my protein in but have lost only 40 pounds. I'm scared to get on the scale anymore. I wonder if I'm eating too much, too little, still can't get in 64 oz of fluid, I have vitamin deficiencies (sp?)...just need some help. Any advice would be very greatly appreciated. Maybe I need to have a get together so I can meet some of the success stories that I read about on here. Do people do that anymore? I know they used to. I just want this to work for me and maybe I need to be more involved in the support aspect to keep the faith and get some tips. Sorry...just feeling overwhelmed and unsuccessful. Any thoughts out there? Jen

jen 40 pounds is awesome!    We all lose at different rates, but what is important is that we all lose.   I think it's pretty much impossible for you not to lose.    Getting in your water and protein is key, no way out of it.   What i did was first of all i always had a bottle of water in my hand.    Then i set goals, like i would drink one bottle by noon, one by 6pm and then another one by bedtime.    It's easy to get overwhelmed, just stay focused and be determined.    Linda

What Linda said,,,, You'll be fine. Stay on track and keep the water and protein going. kp

You are doing great. I was at 42 lbs at 9 weeks out. I am still losing. The more you have to lose the faster you lose. When is the last time you lost 40 lbsin 9 weeks??? Measure yourself every couple weeks. The inches you are losing will amaze you.

Thanks to those of you that replied. I just I just have to deal with my weight loss as it is. Thanks anyways.

Hi Jen, We all know how anxious you are to see those results.  But you are doing great.  Don't worry, it will kick in.  I remember feeling like I would be the person that this surgery did not work for.  What I did was make sure to take my measurements.  Because if I did not see progress on the scale - I would see it on the measuring tape.  You will be amazed with the inches you are losing. Take care, Carey

Here are my thoughts: You've lost an average of 4.44 lbs. a week since surgery.  Did your surgeon promise you something higher?  I always wonder what people's surgeons told them when they feel like they aren't losing enough.  This isn't a race, and you need to set realistic goals for yourself.  How much do you think it would take for you to feel sucessful?  If you had lost 5.5 lbs. a week would that mean you didn't fail? As long as you are following very carefully the plan your nut and surgeon set for you, then you have no worries.  You will gain and lose at your own rate, and can't measure yourself against anyone else.  You can meet and read about 100 people on this site and each one will have lost at a different rate than you.  Please give yourself some realistic expectations and maybe re-read the material given to you.  There are most of the answers.  Go through past posts.  Most post-ops post here that they are not losing fast enough.  Then we all chime in and tell them it will happen as long as you do what you are supposed to do. You've got to build up some confidence in yourself and your ability to make this change in your life.  You are the source of that confidence, not us.  Believe that you can do it, that your body will respond, and set your sights for a year from now....not a few weeks. 

If I could figure out a way to delete this post - I would. I am sorry to have posted looking for support. My surgeon gave me no # of pounds per week I am gauranteed to lose. No surgeon would EVER do that. The ideas I have are all my own. After reading numerous stories I do and did have expectations in  my head. That's natural to have. What I do agree with is I need to find confidence in myself. But there are some of us out there no oozing wth self condfience. It takes time and so I do rely on others for support. Apparently this just isn't the place for advice and ideas and support.

I think we all go through this to one extent or another.  Everyone thinks they are going to be the only one that is unsuccessful.  But, like Brenda said, if you are doing what your surgeon and dietician have instructed you to do, you are on the right path. I can remember being so frustrated because it took me losing over 100 pounds before anyone could even tell I had lost weight.  I struggled with that for months after surgery.  As far as vitamin deficiencies go, your surgeon will check your blood work for any abnormalities.  If you are feeling that something's not right, you need to call your surgeon and have them check things out before your next appointment. Try to remember that weight loss is not a race.  (Even if it were, you would still be winning at the rate you are losing.)  I'm really sorry that you feel the comments you have received here are unhelpful.  Maybe you could go to a local support group and speak with others who have had the same issues. Best of luck to you, Jenn

Click on "My OH" at the top of the screen.   Then click on "My Posts".  Find the post you made and there will be a "Delete" button under it.  Not sure if it deletes everyone's replies, though.

I'm not sure if you are upset by my reply.  I don't like to sugar coat things, and I was a little surprised that you thought you might have failed after losing 40 lbs.  I  apologize if you found my "tough love" offensive.  I did not intend for it to be so.  There are people out there that get numbers from friends or even someone in the doc's office.  I always discourage that whenever I hear of such a thing.  We are all individuals and you have to realize that from day one.

As for self-confidence......you don't have to ooze it, but you HAVE to have it.  You changed your body and you have to now stand up for yourself......to family, friends, other medical professionals, and your own demons.  As I said before, I didn't mean to upset you by talking about that either. I don't apologize for what I posted, but if it was my post that made you so mad, then I hope you'll re-read with a positive attitude and see that I didn't mean to upset you.  I spent a lot of time watching people scrutinize every ounce of weight they lose or didn't and I don't believe that is a good way to start this new life you've given yourself.