Just a quick poll

After reading Tricia's post about depression, I am curious as to how many others feel the same way. You dont have to neccessarily reply to my post here but if you could email me personally that would be great. The reason why I am asking is that I am (have been) suffering some MAJOR medical issues, and after thousands of dollars in testing........still no answers.......all i get is some looks like I am crazy. Which is making me more and more depressed. Some days I dont even want to go out of the house. I know that I am not alone, and even at 300 pounds I never felt so much pain within my body, or mental anguish. The answer I keep getting is there just isnt enough research on WLS, so I am going to start my own. If you could and are willing to share your story, please do so. Thank You. PS you can email me directly at [email protected] Thank You in Advance!

I'd be curious. I hope people will post here. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of. I believe there are many unanswered questions about WLS and it's long term effects. I've heard that depression can certainly be one side effect, whether it's because you can't eat the same as others, or you grieve food, or all the changes are a lot to take in (even tho' many are great changes), or body chemistry changes, etc. I suffer from mild depression, I think, now. I'm pre-op, and my problems are less from weight issues as some other things going on right now. Anyway, just my two cents, and like I said, I hope people will post here....it's all part of it. And it helps others.

Oh Patty, I agree! I hope that they will post here too, but some people just dont like to air their laundry for all, so I will keep note, and without using names report my findings to all.

I have battled depression & anxiety my entire life. I thought that with the weight loss that it would be one of those things that got cured too. Unfortunately, it did not. I still take anti-depressants but I don't have the anxiety as much as I used to. I do keep a script of xanax for when I get really bad attacks but that is usually only about once a month now. I still see a therapist once a month (that's all my insurance will cover). But on the flip side, I went through a lot this past year with the near death of my son so I don't know if that is what is keeping the depression around or not. I am sure that it contributed to it. I still fight so many head demons and I still have trouble grappling with what size I am now. I also know that I have been having a lot of depression about how I still look with the excess skin issue. Sometimes the thought of or looking at all the excess skin makes me more depressed than the excess weight did. Well, there's my 2 cents. And I am happy to post it here because maybe someone will have an idea of how to help pull me out of this funk! Tracy

Tracy, I have a long ways to go, but I do worry about all the excess skin. And I think it will really be a physical and a very emotional problem for me. I know you can have tummy tucks and hopefully, at least, that will be paid for....but the thought of that really scares me, as much as the WLS. But I know my arms will be horrible, because they already are! Anyway, just wanted to say that I understand. Of course, I still think it will be better to deal with excess skin than all the extra weight......I hope......

Sandy I still suffer from depression. Lots of things have changed but still they stay the same. Figure that one out. I've been on Wellbutrin for a long time now and my shrink told me I will be on it for the rest of my life, which is fine with me. The wellbutrin keeps me on an even keel most days. I know and can feel the days I'm out of sorts and I'm allowed to take an extra 100mg of Wellbutrin on those days, that's because I'm not on the timed released ones. I don't feel any more that anything medical is caused from the depression like it was when I was at 350 pounds. I know though that depression can cause medical issues. Hang tough and I hope you get things worked out for you to be your best. Huggssssssssss, Frankie

Sandy, I did not know you were ill. I hope they cam find out what the issue is. It must be tough with having a new baby and everything. I have had some extreme pains at times and I was told it could be an internal hernia which is only seen by surgery. There is no test for this. I am planning to have slight revision on my TT next year and will have them look then. Until then, I suffer on occassion and it does pass eventually. I used to suffer from severe depression. I suffered even before I was super obese. I suffered as a teenager as well. On rare occassions I will have bouts, but I see the related the causes as well. Since surgery, I have had almost no depression issues. I feel like I was freed. My attitude and outlook on life has changed 100%. I am not the same person I used to be. Today I am happy and when I do get down, it asses relatively quickly and I force myslef to work out like a maniac during any rough patch. I know you asked for responses from those who suffer, but I have to stand up for those pre ops that are scared they will not get better. It can get better. Anti- depressants scare me. My aunt went on some and she is no longer depressed, but she is not the same woman we used to know. It is like all of her humor and good nature was removed. She does not even cry anyomore. That is just not normal. I worry about her, but she said she feels fine. I wonder if they do that to everyone. I hope you feel better and I hope everyone who is suffering from depression can get the help they need. Terri

Hi Sandy ... I am really quite the lurker these days and maybe only once a week I sign on .. vs the 25 times a day I used to .. so how appropriate it is for me to see your post. Sorry to hear that you are having a lot of medical issues. I can relate ... I used to suffer from depression adn was on celexa for 3 years .. I went off it 8 months prior to WLS .. although, I am happy - it helped me out (YEA) .. I am not depressed now .. like I was in prior years .. Although, let me tell you - after the year I have had .. I have ALOT that I could be depressed about ... My gallbladder came out, I suffered from severe blood loss (hemoglobin was 3.5 which is terrrrrrrrible - the normal is 12-18) .. with thousands of dollars of tests -done .. all to come up negative .. 59 units of blood transfused, 12 hospital stays in the past 5 months .. ICU for weeks .many surgeries... finally exploratory surgery (which wrecked my beautiful tummy tuck) - and left a 12 inch scar .. but, they found several stomach ulcers and an internal hernia that had perforated the bowel .. (not good) .. March 5th I died. Yep .. I died. I was in an airplane - dead. So .. I have a lot to be thankful for. Even with all that the past months dealt me .. I am totally here to tell you - you will get through this rough time you are facing .. and you will feel peace .. I PROMISE .. because I was totally where you are .. (or sound slike where you are) I struggle with the excess skin .. and I am having my final plastic surg in 2 weeks ... all my friends think I am crazy - that I have to let my body heal .. well, it's healing and I need to do this surgery for me, my mental sanity. It's funny - when having the WLS .. I never thought about the hanging skin and what that would "mean" to me ... Losing almost 200 lbs is hard to deal with .. let alone the skin, the sickness that I have encountered, the body image .. etc .. Well, thank god for Dr. Ellen .. she is amazing. Last December she did a butt lift, arms and tt. She did an amazing job. HOWEVER, LET ME BE CLEAR ... I am often asked .. would I do this again .. absolutely in a heart beat .. I have a chance to live a longer life now .. I am doing t hings I would have never been able to do .. so there is much to be thankful for. However, this journey hasn't been easy .. and it's been hard financially and mentally - but, but, but ... find a good dr. (shrink) .. don't worry if you are prescribed antidepressants .. it WILL h elp you ... and as far as all the medical issues ... Stay strong ... you are in much better health now .. despite what you are dealing with now. August 25th ... I am having my inner thighs done, breast lift, all that skin on the side of your ribs from the once huge boobs taken off and then she is going to fix my tummy - the scar from where they had to go in and emergently open me up - (not her work) - so a revised tt if you will. SO .. sheshhhh ... do I want to go back to "recovery" mode .. no way - but, I need to put this part of my journey behind me .. and move forward. I never really thought about all this hanging skin .. but, I will say for me .. it's an issue .. I can't handle looking at it .. so I am thankful to be in Dr. Ellen's hands. She is incredible. Anyone else struggle with seeing themselves for the size they really are now? I do. BUT, I hear it will take a few years for the head to catch up with the brain. I also worry about gaining weight .. I have gained 4-8 lbs over the past 5 months .. when I was discharged from the hospital end of March I was told I was tooo thin and needed to gain weight (wow - imagine that! .. ) - so I added carbs in to help with that .. but, now .. I worry that I will go back up and it's a valid concern of mine .. it's the snick snacking .. that I did to try and gain a few lbs .. so to help my body heal and recover ... UGH .. now, I need to stop that!!!! It's such a slippery slope! Anyway. My blood has stabilized .. I am on daily meds .. and will be for the next few years .. my other health issues are at bay now .. My medical bills for the 2 months I was in the hospital - er surgeries, all the tests, etc .. was over 500K (ICU adds up quickly) - so know that I understand about all the testing you are going through .. and the financial drain .. just hang in there ... try to keep a positive spin inside you somewhere .. that precious baby should be a great incentive. Wow ... I guess I just got on a typing frenzy .. I will stop now. If you need to talk or want to know more - in case it mirrors anything you are going through ... my email is [email protected] .... don't hesitate to contact me!!! Happy day to all!!!!!! Really ... happy day ... Enjoy the moment you are in right now .. Hi to everyone that I haven't seen in so long! Karryn

I don't mind sharing the truth if it might help others. I believe that is what we are all here for. It's important to me to gain knowledge from others. I had cancer at age 31, went through triple reproductive cancers- meaning my ovaries, uterus and cervix had cancer, and had to be removed. I weighed close to 300 lbs then. I went through menopause at age 32. I was not married, and never have been married. (tho I am waiting for prince charming!) My family was severely hard on me because of my weight. I grew up being told "you'll never amount to anything because of your weight" or...."you have such a pretty face if you'd only lose that weight". I fought all my life with my parents. Until last year. I have been on several depression meds but they cause side effects for me I cannot tolerate. Nightmares are the most common. And as it is, I don't sleep good anyway. Before WLS I had sleep apnea and was awake half the night anyway. What worked for me, may not work for others. But I take .5 mg of Alprazolam, more commonly knowns as Xanax, It is the ONLY med out there that controls my panic attacks when they hit me. Which could be any time for any thing from crowds to stress. I have learned over the past decade with my battle of panic - anxiety disorder, to allow other things to fill my spirit when this happens if at all possible. For instance, my escape is to get in my truck and drive, and listen to my favorite music. I also enjoy going to the lake, and watching the sun dance on the water. That to me, is stress relief. Though not lasting a long time, it does seem to help. I also sought counseling once, through a program offered at work, which was free. However the incident surrounding my appointment was a waste of my time as the man whom with I was going to talk to, was highly rude to me so I left. They are not all that way, but I was upset and made it clear what happened was rude. I try to avoid stressful situations, but it isn't always possible. And now, food does not satisfy me anymore like it use to. HOWEVER--------WALKING AND JOGGING. DOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've taken up jogging and it is intermittent with my walking. But, it does wonders on my spirit and soul. Find something you are interested in -- be it a craft, or animals, or yoga or music or whatever, and increase your time in it somehow. We all need time for just us, ourselves, "ME". Email me anytime if you want to discuss the issue further!!!

Sandy, This is my opinion on the whole subject. I think a lot of people who have had wls have depression issues. I think part of the reason they were obese was because they ate to help with their depression. I also think that they felt wls would "cure" their depression. A lot of people think that just looking good will solve all of their problems. But then they find out that life sucks just as much thin as it does fat. Unless life was already pretty good. But if you had a crappy job and or a crappy marraige to begin with then it is still there. I also think that it is possible in your case that you could have some post partum depression and should definitely keep that in mind and talk with your ob about it. Post partum depression can be horrible without medication and can lead to psychosis. Please don't wait to talk to someone if you haven't already about the depression. I hope you feel better and I will pray for you. I do know that this surgery does change our bodies and I am fighting issues now too after a bout of flu. It makes things different and harder to deal with physically. I have spent 3 weeks with constant chronic nausea and chronic fatigue. I will deal with this and get through it and so will you. Wendy