Freaking out a little - I need your 2 cents

Hi, Everyone. I haven't posted in awhile, but the last time I did, all of you were awesome and gave me lots of good comments. Since then, I must admit, I've been guilty of "lurking", but all of your posts help so much that I read every day. I got cleared for surgery today and it happened much sooner than I thought it would. Yes, that's a good thing, and while I'm excited, I'm a little freaked out, too. My surgeon is going to be Dr. Kevin Krause out of Beaumont and I'm going to have the RNY. (I can't find one bad thing written about him, but if any of you had him and have any comments, I'd love to hear them.) I guess I just want to hear comments about how things are after surgery. Like, did many of you love to eat before you decided to have surgery? (I've dieted 90% of my life, but I have to say that I like to eat. I eat healthy now, except for the occasional splurge, but I don't lose weight.) Does it just not matter after surgery? Do you not care about eating anymore? When you're 2, 3, 4 years out, can you eat anything resembling a small portion or is it always one bite? For example, if you want salad, is it only one forkful? Does swallowing feel different? I guess I don't really have a great grasp of whether life returns to a relatively "normal" state. I read about people who take a pill and it gets stuck in their throat and I start to wonder whether putting anything in my mouth is going to be a major ordeal. And, I guess my last question is ... if your favorite food before was a Whopper, does it freak you out that you can NEVER eat a whole Whopper again? (I love Whoppers, but I can't tell you when the last time I had one was. However, not eating them is different than NEVER being able to eat one again - the rest of my life is, hopefully, a long time. And no, I wouldn't trade my health for a Whopper. Some of these questions might lead you to believe that I haven't made my decision or done my homework, etc. Both of those things are untrue. I guess I'm just having an emotional evening cause OMG - it's REALLY happening!!! Any advice, comments, or "stories" you have would be GREATLY appreciated. No one knows the before and after like all of you and I just need to hear more of the real deal. Thanks, Kim

I just wanted to send you a hug & tell you congratulations! I've not had my surgery yet. Today I met my surgeon, got labs, and now I just need a psych evaluation and wait for insurance approval. But I was informed that I could be having my surgery within 2 months. So, I can relate to your anxiety. It's really going to happen and your life will be changed forever. I too am going to have the RNY, open surgery. I was told today that with my pills, they can be crushed and mixed with your food to prevent blockage. You can also eat up to 3/4 of a cup of food at one time as long as you chew, chew, chew, and take your time. I can relate to your statement about being able to choose not to eat something and not being able to eat it. It's funny how the mind works, isn't it? I also think it's perfectly normal to have this sort of anxiety, and I wouldn't say you haven't truly made a decision or not done your homework. Once you know you're on your way, you want to know EVERYTHING about EVERYTHING. Again, it's a life changing event. I want to wish you the best of luck with your surgery AND all the things that come along afterwards. Know that you're not alone AND in good company here! Hugs, Shawn

Hi, Shawn! Thanks for the response and the hugs. I need them both. I read your profile and I can SO relate to just about everything you said. If I had a dollar for every diet I've ever tried, it would probably pay for my surgery. As you can tell, I'm a little scared, but I, too, am more scared of what life holds in store for me if I stay the way I am. I don't want to have a heart attack, stroke, high blood pressure, etc., etc., etc. The life style change is definitely going to be huge, but I'm hoping that the initial disinterest in eating that I hear comes after surgery will make that a little easier to transition in to. I am a fast eater, so that will be difficult, but I'm thinking that I'll be so scared that I'm going to throw up, that I'll be taking baby bites and sips. Again, thanks for the response - it just helps to know that the things I'm feeling are normal and that there are others out there in the same boat. Good luck to you and keep us posted on your progress. Hugs back, Kim

Good Luck to you...as many here know I will only sing praises of Dr Kevin Krause he is my hero ( even listed as such on my MySpace page LOL) Welcome to the family. I emailed you a little longer response any questions feel free to email anytime. Jill

I don't know about your surgeon but I can tell you how my eating experiences have been so far (just the first six weeks). Yes, I loved eating, both in quanity and quality I could make serious dents in buffets of any style. I eat things that taste good now, but off a shorter list. And, I can appreciate the smell of a Cinabon without wanting to eat it, which is still startling to me. I'm beginning to get a little appetite instead of eating by the clock and some things sound better than others. I got a Whopper Junior (with everything) about two weeks ago and ate half in the restaurant (left most of the bun, it seemed very gummy and uninteresting. It was truly all i wanted. I keep a little cooler in the car now and that's where I put the other half, which I had for lunch the next day. When i eat out I enjoy the company (book or person) and start out by mentally dividing the protein in half. i chew slowly and very thouroughly, stop when my pouch gurgles, nose sniffles or I lose interest (yes, it really happens). If I still have any interest i try a bite or two of the veggie, which has only happened once so far. Things taste just as good, but I'm not intrested in stuffing myself anymore, even emotionally. Some food sits like a rock for hours and then digests (roast beef last night), some just doesn't work at all (eggs, yucky). Some, like chicken, are sometime friends. You asked about portions. Right now the biggest I put on my plate is 4 ounces, and I haven't wanted to eat all of it. I ate more when it was soup, but that moves through quickly. I used to hate throwing up more than anything. I've only done it a few times but it isn't nearly as painful or miserable as it was before. Sounds odd, but the immediate relief that follows is a blessing. There are some days I wish I wern't balancing Drinking More Water with vitamins and protein and trying just one new food a day. Then I get on the scales, or bend over to pick up something on the floor or take a deep, comfortable breath and am willing to put up with anything! Except eggs.

Kim, First off CONGRATS! For me eating was totally different the things I loved before I can't eat now... like eggs, bread, chicken.. the things I didn't like before like cheese, red meat I love... everyone is different and in time you do eat more but you shouldn't eat in the quality of what you can eat prior to the surgery... I am over 1 1/2 years and I eat depending on the texture of the food but an average 6-8 ozs of food at one time. I always start with protein, vegs and fruit daily, I can't eat a plate full of rice, noodles that stuff just makes me too full too fast. I too was a slow eater and the hardest thing even to this day is to eat slowly but I always get a reminder to slow down if I eat too fast my heart feels like it's coming out of my chest I stop eating a few minutes then go back eating very slow... I've been lucky I don't dump but I can usually tell if I am going to agree with what I'm eating within the first few bites if my tongue says no then I stop, right after surgery I knew within the first bite now takes about three. Just remember everyone is different it's trial and error. Good luck and best of wishes! Take care, Renee