Major Issue

Ok, here is the story. I have a surgery date set for July 10. The dilema is whether or not to postpone it and here is why. Recently I have been going through an awful lot. My husband has had an affair and we have put our house in MI up for sale and moved in with my parents in CT until we find a home there. We are working on our marriage and have decided to stay married, but I am stilll an emotional mess and in the midst of therapy and all that. I really would rather not cancel my surgery, since I have waited so long to be approved and I finally have a date. The problem is that I will have to go to Michigan alone to have the surgery. My husband just started a new job and cannot take time off and he doesn't want me to have the surgery without him being there. I would have to fly to MI, take a taxi from the airport to the hospital, then my husband would come and pick me up after my surgery and take me home to CT. The alternative is to have the surgery in CT and go through the whole approval process again, which would suck as you all know. What would you do if you were me. Oh, and also, my insurance that I got approved with ends at the end of July and then I will go on my husband's insurance and who knows if that insurance will cover the surgery. Ok, now tell me, what would you do? Postpone and have it in CT or go to MI as planned? Thanks, Mousie

Wow, this is a tough one. In my opinion (for what its worth) It is best to have surgery close to where you live because of after-care. Are you going to be able to keep returning to see your doctor for follow-up visits? Or are you going to be able to find snother Dr. in CT to do your follow-up? How far away from your Dr. do you want to be if you have an emergency? You may never have such a problem but we never know how our bodies will react. Whatever you decide, make sure its the right decision for YOU. Best wishes

I have no response, as your right.. I am going to Ypsilanti for my surgery on July 31. I am from Barrie Ontario Canada Would you please contact me and let me know how your doing since your surgery. thankyou Arlene

Please post the name of the place you are having the surgery as well as the doctor. There are many here who have taken the time to go and visit people who have had the surgery. One of them is Kevin. Don't postpone your surgery! You need to do this for you! You don't want to have to start all over again with a new insurance and in a new state!

Hi Mousie: I'm so sorry for all you've been through. I'd hate to see you have to wait to go through the entire approval process again, but some valid points are made about you being close to aftercare. On the other hand, I think after all you've been through - you need this surgery for YOU. Where are you having the surgery done? If it's in Detroit or Grand Rapids, perhaps there are enough of us out in these areas to help you. Do you still have family or friends here? Keep my good vibes up for you, Julie in Ludington

Hi Mousie, I am pre-op, but I live in Paw Paw, MI. I would say to have the surgery. I know it is a hard issue to deal with home and all. But I am afraid you could end waiting a really long time for another date, if your husband ins will even cover the procedure. There are alot of people of here who are will to help. I know family is alway better. But someone is better than no one. I would be willing to help if I can. Let us know where your surgery is going to be. I don't like that you have to deal with the issue have your husband having an affair. You have been battling to get the surgery. I think you put the surgery first let hubby help with this, if you believe he is committed enough to stay and work things out. Your relationship will be stronger with dealing with working together. What ever you choose, good luck...I am here if you need any help. Becky K.

It might be best to do this one thing for you. If you do not, then you will have regrets and possible animosity (sp) toward your husband for having a hand in stopping something that will be so beneficial to you and something for which you have worked so hard. I don't know...God help you with your decision. Take care of yourself. -m

Although I would not want to see you postpone your surgery, I would have to agree with Kim about pre and post care. I would not want to have problems where no one knew me or my doctor. What happens when the insurance you have now ends and the new insurance wont cover out of state procedures. I am not saying you will have problems but you need to make allowances just in case. Of course the final decision is up to you but....it's just my 2 cents.

This is a hard choice to make. But honestly remembering how bad I wanted to get it done. I think I would go ahead and have the surgery. What if your new insurance will not cover it???? I think this is too important. We are talking about your health too not just what you look like. Where are you having your surgery? Carey