Happy with surgery VS Unhappy

Hi Everyone, I was speaking to someone today who was not happy with their decision to have the surgery..and it got me thinking. Does the amount of dissatisfaction you feel before surgery have anything to do with how you feel about it afterwards? I don't know if this is the case..that's why I'm asking. I am pre-approval right now (going to my grievance hearing tomorrow ). I guess if it wasn't for my faith you could classify me as suicidal. My weight has effected my life negatively that much..that sometimes I wish I could just check out..but I do have hope. I can have one incident (like the one last week with the seat belt on the plane not buckeling) and it's not just a nuisance to me.. it's humiliating beyond belief. It effects me for days afterwards when I have things like that happen.. and my health seems to be getting so much worse as my weight goes up that I am just miserable. I just want to crawl in a hole. This being said, I have to imagine that unless I have some very serious complications with this surgery, that I will be blessed and thankful for it... but maybe that's not the case. I wonder if those of you out there who are NOT satisfied with your decision... how effected was your life before the surgery? Was your weight just a nuisance.. or was it all-encompassing and ruled every move you made. I'm not trying to start anything.. I would just like opinions... I think it could be interesting.. or I could just be very very strange to think this may be the case.

even though i'm not dissatisfied i'm gonna answer you in that i was as miserable as you could be pre-surgery. My life was much as you describe only complicated even further with deaths and betrayals in the family. Yet i am so ecstatically happy about my surgery that words cannot describe it. It was the best present i ever gave myself and i have ZERO regret. Good luck with your grievance.

Hi Kim Did you get my emails i sent to you yesterday? I hope they can help you out some tomorrow. Let me tell you this, every single decision i made when i was big was based on my weight. i didn't go anywhere, cause i would have to walk and the way ppl looked at me. i didn't work, for the same reasons. Yes, i had very bad complications, but i was never unhappy about making this decision. I , like you now, was plain miserable. I hated my life and was going nowhere. My life now is all about having fun and enjoying my kids and everyone around me. I hate staying home and go crazy if i have to. I love what my life is now, Thank God for giving me this chance. Hugs Linda

Thanks for the input so far.. in some sick twisted way I am getting consoled by our pre-surgery misery. I just know that there has to be something better... Linda, I sure did get your e-mails. Thank you SO Much!!!! I really was helpful and it calmed be a great deal! I am still very nervous about tomorrow, but whatever will be will be, right? (kay-sa-rah-sa-rah) Just keep me in your prayers.... My hearing is at 4 p.m.

kim hi i had my surgery in may of 2001 and i am happy i made the decision to have this surgery. i am a healthier person cuz of it and would do it over again if i needed too.i had a good surgery and easy recovery time. hope this helps you. a group of us post-op people meet every week if ya ever want to meet with us. tomorrow we are meeting at bob evans in birch run at 11:00 if ya wanna join us we would be happy to have you come. we are a great support group . keep in touch

Do you meet in Birch Run every week? Just wondering because that would be a close meeting for me to come to since I'm not too far off in the Bridgeport area. I will try to make tomorrows meeting but not totally sure if I will be able to, but would love to know about any future support group mtgs planned. =) thanks!

Hi Diane, We haven't "seen" you here in quite a while. How are you? God bless you, Annette

Hi Kim, I am another one happy to have had the surgery, but I do remember right after surgery (when your healing and the hormones are rushing) thinking "what the heck did I do this for". One of my doctors partners asked me when removing my staples if I would do it again and I told him not to ask me yet. He asked me why and I told him that I applied for surgery and had surgery within 3 weeks (very surreal) after not having any real side affects from my weight (that I thought at the time). I told him I was sore, sad and couldn't eat and was very much not seeing the good side of all of this yet. He told me that I must have given it some thought to have even answered him that way. I told him that once I wrapped my head around all of the things that I had to now change I would be fine and I was. This surgery is exactly what you make of it. It changes your body not your head so if you have issues that make you want to eat and you can't you are not going to be happy. But the good news is that you have time (since you are still fighting for it) to find other ways of dealing with mood swings or stress. I always worked and quite honestly never realized how large I was... I had convinced myself I just took bad pictures, lol. I got terrible migraines and had arthritis in my ankles and back and had changed the way I did things "because of my arthritis". Go into this knowing that there will be pain, discomfort and a lot of re-learning to do and do it. Convince yourself not to test the waters with the forbidden fruits and not to become dependant on a scale to figure out that you are "normal". I can't imagine you going into this with your eyes wide open and not being glad you did it afterward! Good Luck, Mary

I know what you mean about things sitting with you for a long time. I remember once going to the Big E with my hubby for a fun day. I was excited to take a romantic ferris wheel ride, which I hadn't done in forever. When we got to the front of the line the guy said oh, we need a seat for three, huh? You, your husband and the baby to be. I was so mortified! I cried the entire ferris wheel ride and the rest of the day was ruined. I have been asked more times than I care to admit if I was pregnant. Those things don't just go away and they are not just a passing nuissance. I can tell you that. I am pre op and waiting for my approval. I am so hesitant about this surgery and really scared. But my life up until now has been so difficult due to my weight, just one situation like the ferris wheel after another. I have been doing a lot of research and I have not found one person who has regretted having the surgery, not one! Even the people who have had complications still would do it again in a second. That says a lot to me. Most say how unbleiveable their lives have become and how it was like a rebirth for them. They are finally "normal" and enjoying their lives without weight comments and nuissances. Hope that helps a little with your feelings. Good luck to you. Janet Hadden

Hi Kim, I was dead if I didn't do it. I was very happy with my decision and would do it again. I have heard and have spoken to people who were not happy and wished they had not done it. Not short term either - like me I had a few nights of doubt but I got through it. I am fine with it and have had a lot of luck along the way in spite of the mess the company was in during my process. The only thing I would have changed was the company that ran my procedure. Dr. Schuhknecht was great and the med staff/support was great but I never knew who was going to handle my papers next at CORI. I guess I'm lucky I got through when I did. No telling what would have happened to my stuff now. But, it was a good decision and I am glad I did it. My weight ruled my life and made everybody miserable. As Theresa put it - it is freeing to be this way now. As far as aftercare goes I have transfered all my stuff and followed my surgeon to Real Weight Loss Solutions and things are great now. Good luck and take care. Positive vibes for you. kp @ goal