Sugar Addict Worries

Hello Friends, I am waiting for approval and thinking about life after wls while reading all your posts. One of my biggest concerns is not being able to eat sugar post op. I know it is a no no but I am so addicted to it now. Sometimes I even eat cake or cookies for breakfast. I have been on Atkins before and have done well. I know I can stick to it for awhile, but the reason I can't seem to lose weight now is because I cannot do it long term. Why will this be different after surgery. If I can't do it now why will I be ablel to do it then? And I often think about just living normally and how much that is going to change. Will I become miserable knowing I can never have what I like ever again? My husband and I were thinking about taking up camping this summer. I was like "oh how fun, we can make a fire and roast marshmellows". Then I thought, oh no, I can't have marshmellows . Just little things like that creep into my mind. My husband, too, fears I will be miserable and we won't be able to do normal things and live a normal life. Anytime I bring this up to other wls people, they get angry with me and say you don't need that stuff and you have to give it up. I thought this was a place to be honest and admit your eating issues and solicit help. I am just being honest. I love sugar; there is no way around it. Will I be miserable after surgery? What are your thoughts? Is there anyone on here who loved goodies and sugar as much as I do? That also includes the carbs. Pasta, pizza, potatoes, etc. I feel like I have to give everything up, forever. Maybe I am just not as strong as you all are. How do you know if you are going to be able to do it? And like I said, if I can't stick to it now for more than a few months, what makes me think I will be able to do it post op? I'm very scared. Do you think this means I am not ready? I am 240 and very miserable at this weight. Losing the weight is everything to me. But I just wish I didnt have to give up all my favorites FOREVER.

Janet, You have to make a choice. What means more to you? Sugar,Carbs,Pizza or being healthy & feeling great. I do admit it is very very difficult the first few months, but, what do you consider normal? Cakes & cookies for breakfast? I did the same. The reason we have wls is to have a new beginning, our tool will only work as good as we make it work. This is not an easy weigh out When you were a newborn baby I doubt if your mother gave you cookies,cakes,pasta or even pizza. One day we will be able to have these things in moderation. I stay away from these because I know I am a food addict & 1 hit could send me over the edge. I enjoy my new life & I thank GOD everyday for the second chance he has given me to do what he intended w/ my body. I am not mad I am just giving you my opinion. Their are GREAT sugar free products out there. I even think Tooter has mentioned sugarfree marshmellows. Keep the faith. Linda 309/194/140

Hi. Just my opinion, but I believe you are not ready. If you can't bear the thought of living without sugar and carbs, then you can't bear the life of healthy eating. You say, "losing weight is everything to me", but it is not if you are not ready to make a lifestyle change. You say you want to be normal...eating cake and cookies for breakfast is not normal...for a healthy person. If and when you choose to be healthy, you will make the decision that is right for you, be it WLS or diet. This is not mad nor is it meant to be judgemental of you. I had the WLS and experimented with sugar and carbs and a "normal" life and all it did was slow me down and add back some of the precious weight I lost. I am now back to the losing side and feeling a whole lot better. Be ready. It is forever...and it is wonderful!! Good Luck, Diane

I dont think you are not ready, I just think you are uncertain based on what you presently live for. A life filled with sugar is only sugar coated and is meaningless. More than anything, do you want to be with your husband for 30 or more years? Then what is more important to you? You need to look at the options in front of you and choose how you want to live your life before you make the switch because I will tell you now, that once I had surgery, I would not stand for sweets, and I still find them horrible. Life after WLS is different for everyone, I just highly recommend that you do some serious soul searching and consider approaching people who can give you solid advise like here. I wish you the best, and am here for you anytime.

This is exactly what I feared would be the response to my post. People telling me that eating cookies for breakfast isn't normal and that losing the weight is not that important to me if I can't give up the sugar. It is almost like everyone reads between the lines and only sees the parts they want to. All I said was that I love sugar and I think I will have a hard time giving it up. Wasn't it difficult for all of you? I mean how did we get in this situation to begin with. I am assuming you didnt all eat fruits and veggies and no goodies. What I was trying to say was that I know I have to give the goodies up post op and I can do it when I set my mind to it. My worry was how much my normal lifestyle will be affected and if I will be totally miserable. Many things in life revolve around food: parties, picnics, holidays, social situations and other gatherings. The marshmellow roasting while camping was just an example. I wasn't saying I can't live without marshmellows or cookies for breakfast. I was asking if the changes you had to make in your life made you feel depressed to a point where you wish you didnt have the surgery. I like doing fun things that involve food sometimes and I like to have the occasional goody. It that out of the realm of possiblity post op? That is my real question. It just seems that whenever I am brutally honest about my issue with goodies, people get offended or act all high and mighty like I am not ready or able to give them up. I am hurt by this and very confused. I thought this was supposed to be a sort of support group. Instead I feel like I'm the only one who eats food that is bad for me, when I'm sure we all did pre op or we wouldnt have gotten out of control. I want to be able to be honest and get honest feedback without offending people or being judged. I appreciate all your responses, but I am confused about the insensitivity to my eating issues. If anywhere, I thought I would be understood here.

Jennifer, Just wanted to thank you for making me feel human ;)

You see, the problem with this board is that there are many afraid to post what their reality is, because it brings the militants out in full force who will attempt to bash the hell out of them for being human. Don't bother trying to post that you even want a soda around here these days. I hate to be so negative, but that is the absolute reality of it. I am not afraid to speak what is real for many to help ease your mind. The truth is that you really will not want it in the beginning. I welcomed the built in mechanism that would keep me away from sugar though. You must not be miserable enough yet. Anyway, for the most part you will get so horribly sick from sugar and overeating carbs that you lose your taste for it. It is kind of like getting sick on tequilla or Jack Daniels. The very smell does you in after that. Heavily fried foods and the smell of them make me sick these days. You adjust and you learn to substitute or eat in moderation. Your body will compensate over time and your tolerance will increase. I can still eat sugar. I eat a few marshmallows when camping. I even eat 1/2 a smore as long as I am not drinking alcohol(Booze+sugar=nightmare sickness). I can eat a small piece of cake, but sugary frosting gets scraped off. I can never drink regular juice or pop, but low sugar and diet is just fine. I still have my 8 ounces of OJ every morning with my vites. The thing is, you will not have to stop living and enjoying life. Your life will be so much richer. I enjoy food so much more now as I get to focus on quality over quantity. I used to worry they would not give me enough food. I NEVER worry about that now. Freshness and taste are more important. I can tell you that I have 8 people in my immediate family who have had WLS. No one follows a particular diet and not one has gained back the weight. My husband gained back like 10 pounds, but he needed to. The first year is tough becasue you really have to watch everything you eat and stay strict to stay healthy. Some people keep that way of life, but I can tell you they are the minority whether they want to believe that or not. Today I make smarter choices because it is really no big deal. I do just fine with soup and a salad over a cheeseburger. But make no mistake, every great while I order that cheeseburger. I also run 2.5 miles three times a week. Your current focus is on the wrong aspect of this journey. I was suicidal and depressed when I was obese. I said that dying on that table was preferable to how I was living. Sugar was the farthest thing from my mind. You will not miss a thing I promise. Change your focus from excuses to action. Using this as an excuse to be afraid is not going to work. Being afraid is normal and justified for many other, more justified reasons. Sorry this was so long. I do not know what got into me. God thing I am a fast typist. Take care, Terri

Terri, I thank you for being so honest with me. I was beginning to feel like I was the only one with a problem with food in a roomful of people who were severely overweight. I felt like I was in the twilight zone, like "how can these people not understand?" "They must have been where I am at some point!" I think you are correct in saying that no one wants to admit it or talk about it once they have had the surgery. I guess I thought that was what this board was for. But, believe it or not, my angel decided not to be my angel anymore because of my post. Something about us not being in the same place in life. Hows that for support??? Well there are many places to go online that discuss the surgery. Maybe I am just in the wrong place. I do want to thank you and all of the others *****sponded to my post in an understanding and honest manner. Thanks for not bashing me about my sugar woes. I'm sure we have all been there! From now on, I will not post about eating issues here. I'll just read other posts and take in information. The problem is that I am counting on those posts to be honest. Now I am worried that people are "sugar coating" post op life. I haven't read any posts at all that say they wish they hadn't had the surgery and they miss the goodies. It that just how it is or are they lying? Hmmmmmmmm something to consider I guess. An alcoholics craving for drink doesn't just go away. Why would a food addicts? I know a lot of people on here are mad at me, but there are also a lot who are honest and supportive. Thanks to those people. I wish everyone luck on their journey. Truly, I do.

Hello Janet, Sorry you feel so scard about sugar ,I know your feeling because I live 3 houses from our friends bakery & my hubby brings it home all the time plus he loves to cook .I'll tell you their is alot of head games with WLS I have not had to deal with wanting them to much I think I want something easy to eat .But not like I have a taste for sugar goodies. The smell alone makes me But do try to get into a good support group through you doctor or hospital that will help you as well. But were all different you have to do what works for you but remember WLS IS JUST A TOOL AND IF YOUR NOT WANTING TO CHANGE TO BETTER YOUR HEALTH YOU'LL NOT BE ABLE TO KEEP THE WEIGHT OFF. So for me I don't want to ever go back to raw sugar I know for myself if I do I'll gain all my weight plus some back! hang in there *hugs Sue*

Hi Janet, Of course you are worried about giving up sugar - it has been a lifelong comfort and your taste buds smile with glee when they smell it coming! I think your concerns are normal ones. You know your demons now, you haven't experienced what they might be in the future. I am 6.5 years post-op and love sweets. I definitely have a sweet tooth. I won't lie and say I never eat refined sugar. I do. BUT very infrequently. I DO have sweets everyday, however. I have learned to bake scrumptious deserts that the uninitiated would not believe are sugar-free and low fat. Whatever I am hungry for, I convert a recipe and enjoy. Also, there are so many sugar-free commercially prepared items these days, there is a big selection out there. At first, you probably won't want anything sweet. Our tastes change after surgery. Sweet (even artificially sweetened) tastes yucky sweet. If you had told me that before, I wouldnt have believed it. It was over a year before I even had a piece of sugar-free chocolate(and I love chocolate). Now, I enjoy a piece everyday. Before surgery, I was afraid of what I wouldn't be able to eat and what I would have to eat. I really didnt' know if I would be eating cardboard and water for the rest of my life, but wanted to lose the weight and get healthy and gain a better life. I honestly don't miss anything. Like I said, you find just as delicious substitutes or find that eating 1 piece of pizza is so filling and satisfying. I live in the country. We have a bon-fire pit. I make my smores with sf chocolate, I can eat 2 marshmellows, and low-fat grahm crackers. What's to miss. I am going on 7 years and the only regret I have had in all these years is that I didn't have the surgery earlier than I did. I waited until I was 46 yrs. old. I cannot regain those wasted years where I couldn't or wouldn't do what I wanted because of my weight issues. NOW, we have 6 grandchildren and I do with them what I always wanted to do with their mothers but couldn't. NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS THIN FEELS. Your concerns are valid. Ask your questions and get involved with a face to face support group if your surgeon's office has one. That way, you will develop friendships "close up and personal" with people who will help you face your fears and find out which fears may or maynot be valid. Ask yourself the hard questions. Having questions does not necessarily mean you are not ready for surgery. But to me, it means you just haven't gotten all your questions answered yet. Keep asking them, then make your decision based on fact, not pressure or fear. I will be sending you thoughts of peace as you make your important decisions. Together in the Journey, Sharna