Vent...soda and family issues...long (cross-post)

So I'm down about 50 lbs and my sister has been verbally supportive over the past three months.  She helped me shop for new clothes etc. 

She has been a chronic dieter FOREVER, has done weigh****chers and gained and lost the same 40 lbs many times over the past 5 years.  She lost a bunch of weight last summer while going through a divorce and has always been thinner than me even at her heaviest.  Since last summer she put about 25 lbs back on and is again dieting (sort of). 

Another piece of this story is that I have been a die hard diet coke addict for at least 20 years, obviously I had to give it up for the surgery and I miss it terribly.  My sister is just as addicted and as soon as she comes to my house she puts diet coke (that was in my garage left over from when I quit) into my fridge and proceeds to drink it in front of me which is TORTURE.  She knows how much I miss it but I guess I never point blank asked her not to do it in front of me at my house (I don't think I have a right to tell her she can't have it but I do think she could go away from me in my own house at least right now while it's so hard for me).  So I said (perhaps a bit *****ily) that after this was gone there would be no more.  She replied (*****ily) that she didn't live here and it went downhill from there.  She went on to tell me that I've become "mean and nasty" since my surgery.  I didn't really know what to say to that because I honestly don't think it's an accurate statement, sure I've had my moments (and she lives 2 hours away from me so it's not like we're together much) as has she.  I talked to my dh about it (he had RNY about 5 years ago) and he didn't think I'd become mean and nasty (he said maybe bossy, LOL but I'm always that way) and wondered if it was more her issue and maybe her feeling threatened that she may not be the thinner sister for long.  She also has made snide comments about my eating two bites of things (like I can help that!).  I tried to talk to her about it this a.m. before she left to go back home but she was so surly and defensive that nothing productive came out of it.  I told her she hurt my feelings and I got a sarcastic "I'm sorry" so I gave up.  I know we'll work it out eventually but I'm going to take a break from her for awhile I guess and surely stop talking about my weight loss journey.  We are set to go to the beach together (both families) in early August so I hope we work it out by then.  I guess I just wanted to vent and maybe see if anyone has any thoughts on the matter or how I should go from here.  Anyone else had family members give you flak?

Thanks for listening!!

Tami

I have a similar problem but with beer. My friends and family know how much I miss it and last weekend I broke down and had one. Then they were all upset with me for drinking it! Well, then don't bring it to my house and drink it in front of me. Silly families! I think your DH is probably right, but this too shall pass.

Well  the diet coke in your garage wont be anygood in a few more months and they you can happily throw it away lol.   Get rid of it now.   is my advice.   Soda  is just not good for us when we  dont eat very much.   My dad says splenda gets him fat.  I wonder if there is any truth to that  and when he gives up diet coke he loses his belly.  lol.

I found that  when i lost the weight i wasnt as mean or *****y.   You are lucky to have your  hubby for support.  He understands.   You  do not live with your sister so i am sure it will pass.  but dont go  crawling back.   You did nothing wrong.   

Since my  hernia surgery i cant eat more than a couple bites  so my tool is working again.   maybe the scale will move a little more.  

Take care and you are doing great!!!!



Patty