Cold feet

Very nervous about meeting with my surgeon tomorrow afternoon. It is a pivotal point in this process.. I re-read the risks involved with the surgery... am I doing the right thing? Do these risks out weigh the risks associated with morvid obesity? I just dont know. I am so afraid of dying either way.... I wonder if anyone else out there has this fear... ? Fear of dying. I noticed that I am highly afraid of dying. I guess this is something that I should face. I am so sure that if I DONT do this surgery.. I am going to die of a heart attack from something simple as trying to tie my shoes or put my underwear on. I guess that you need to be aware of all the risks....but should that scare the hell out of me? I guess that it should. This is a major decision.. life altering right? I just am curious if these aprehensions are normal. Well I am off to complile my list of questions for my surgeon.

Hi Joel. Cold feet are normal for some people... For me - I was more than ready to get to the "losing side"... get the surgery over with and get on with my life. I couldn't stand being MO anymore - it was not only unhealthy but very inconvenient (I was 25 when I had it done. I'm now 36). While it's a very personal choice, I say: Go For It! Co-morbidities will only get worse with age and you will die prematurely. Chances of you dying from the surgery are very, very slim... but I do understand your fear. Go forward with confidence! Hugs, Susan

Joel, It's VERY normal to voice the apprehension and hesitation you've so bravely shared with us. Prior to the RNY surgery, I had never had any major surgery. I was doing great until the morning of the surgery just over two years ago; I was great even driving to the hospital, just up until I went back into the pre-surgery area and was getting prepped (hospital gown, IV-fluid, etc.). Then, I began shaking like a leaf, thinking how easy it would have been just to get dressed, go to McDonald's for breakfast, and just go into work -- which I didn't do. While I still have about 25-30#s to go to my goal, today, I'm down about 180-190#s from when I started (whi*****ludes about 33#s lost in the 6 months before surgery). Within about 3 weeks of the surgery, I had to stop taking my Avandia and Glucophage medication for Type II diabetes (everyone is different on this), and my blood pressure medication. I can tie my sneakers by merely bending over at the waist. My life has been altered, all for the better. The best thing that you're doing is asking all of these questions, and more. You need to be the best educated and most informed patient you can be. People who ask a lot of questions like the ones you're asking often are the most successful ones in this journey. Most important, however, make certain that this is what you want, and not what others want for you. Good luck, Leesa

Joel, It is very common to have doubts. Honestly I actually prepared my life in case something happened. I made sure my wonderful husband new where all the life insurance policys were and what bills were coming in. I wrote out my living will, and my advanced directives. There is always the chance that something could go wrong even in a surgery that the physician does all the time. I knew that if I didn't have the surgery that I would die from my complications with the obesity. They thought last July that I had Congestive Heart Failure. That was my turning point and I never looked back, before then you could not convince me that gastric bypass was the answer for me. What you are feeling is very normal with any type of surgery. There is no easy surgery they all have risk and complications. I made a pact with myself that if I made it through the surgery that I would get up and walk as soon as they would let me and seriously attempt to avoid any other complications after surgery ie. DVT and Pneumonia. You have every right to have doubts and if you didn't you would be in the minority. There are lots of people who opt to not have it and try dieting one more time. Either way you choose the path and make sure it's for you not for someone else. Up until I had the surgery I really tried to live for what everyone else wanted from me now I live for what I want from me. Good luck at whatever your choice will be. Denise

Good Morning Joel. Just wanted to give you my two sense on how you are feeling towards surgery. For me, the only fear I did have was would I survive the operation and any complications that might follow post op. Other then that I felt that all side effects out weighed the feeling I had towards my own personal obesity. The night before surgery I wrote each of my boys a letter, told them how much I loved them and that I couldn't wait to complete my journey to a much healthier me so that I could enjoy life with them much more. I think it is only natural that you have reservations about surgery. Gastric Bypass is a life changing procedure. If you weren't worried or at least concerned about the outcome I would question whether or not you thought the process through thoroughly. On the up side of it all Joel, I felt exactly what you are going through now. I am now 13 months out. I had my surgery with Dr Schweitzer July 9th of 04, weighing then 279! After a successful surgery, continuing to follow the guidleines of my new pouchey poo I have lost 137 pounds, now weghing 142. I have gone from a 26/28 pant size to an 8/10. Appearence is just half of the fun ~ I love that I can now chase my boys and not feel like death warned me over when I finally catch them I love that I can shop in any store now and not have to stick only to "plus size" I love that I was able to ride every roller coaster that I wanted to this year with my boys and not be afraid that I wouldn't fit, but mostly I love that my life no longer is controlled by FOOD. I eat, heck some days I feel like I eat ALL DAY ~ as I sit here typing I am enjoying a piece of CHEESECAKE with my morning coffee. This of course being a treat for me, it is not my normal breakfast :Wink: Normally I eat an average of 4 to 6 ounces of food, about the size of my palm. WHen I am done, I am done...no more "just another bite" I know if I have that extra bite that I am going to suffer for at least 45 minutes with a nausious feeling and for me I would much prefer using that 45 minutes doing something productive than once again letting food control my life. I am THANKFUL for my decision to have gastric bypass, I love it. If I had to do it all over again I would, in a heartbeat! This pouch of mine, which I love so very much has given me another chance in life and I promise you it has been nothing but pleasure for me. I have been blessed to have ZERO complications, sagging skin is a given so naked is not such a pretty picture I just say thank God for Capri Pants and the light switch For me the PRO's definitley outweighed the CON's. Bottom line, feeling nervous is natural. Dot your I's, cross your T's and leave it in your surgeons hands. My thought is when the man above picks your number ~ your going ~ obese or not! Best of luck to you with your decision. I would be happy to talk to you more if you would like. I also have a list of many questions for the surgeon if you would like me to email them to you? Keep in touch, Patty

Hi Joel I have one wee****il my surgery and I am working very hard on keeping the cold feet away. I too have thought about the dying aspect of this surgery but I feel very confident in my surgeon and the fact that I have made this decision before all the co-morbid conditions kicked in. I dont have diabetes yet even though my mother does. I have no blood pressure problems or heart problems so now is the time to do this. I am keeping the thought of a healthier lifestyle in mind rather then the down side. Just make sure you get all your questions answered and keep in touch with the people on this site for support and guidance. I dont post much but I have learned so much from all these wonderful people. I could have never made this decision if it hadnt been for this site and the people connected with it. Good luck and get and extra pair of socks for them "cold feet" . Hope to see you on the other side. Kim

Joel I too had cold feet but wanted to live more. I was afraid to voice it though, You know bad luck. I am glad you can do that. I seems helpful to discuss it with others. I had my RNY July 28th and am doing fine. Go on and have the surgery just make sure you are confident in your surgeon and you will feel better. It feels better to lose and be able to do things that I had lost the ability to do. Like tie my shoes and pick things up off the floor. Good Luck and Hang in There. We here are cheering you on.

Joel, I think if you didn't have the concerns mentioned and the fear of dying then you would be different. I'm 4 weeks post surgery and had the same fears. I'm 47, had a heart attack at 45, was insulin dependent, and was definately on the road to another heart attack. So, yes, I had the same fears and definately they are normal. Even during the 5 days in the hospital I was wondering if I did the right thing. My blood pressure was fluctuating up and down so they kept me in ICU for 3 days which really made me think that I was being selfish and that I shouldn't have had the surgery and should have just tried to diet harder. Once the first week past, so did that attitude. This is truly teaching me to eat all over again from scratch. I too had sleep apnea with a CPAP machine, coronary trouble, insulin dependent and I made it! Look at the statistics and decide. Whichever way, I wish you luck! vr, mary

I had a nightmare the monday before my surgery, which was on Friday. I had dreamed that I went into respiratory arrest and they called the code and no one came. I think it stemmed from having sleep apnea and during my 2nd sleep study test, I never went into sleep apnea, so they couldnt get me on to cpap. I'm a nurse - and when I "woke up" from the respiratory arrest, I really yelled at everyone that they didnt respond timely to me!! What a dream!! I didnt think I was nervous, but that last week I found myself very very tense. It's normal. Hang in there.