I Need To Vent

I am so disgusted with myself.  In the past 4 months, I have gained back 10 pounds and can't seem to stop.  I haven't even reached goal yet.  The carb monster reared its ugly head and I feel I've lost the ability to fight it.  I also made the unfortunate discovery that I DON'T dump, and now I crave sugar uncontrollably and I think I've lost that fight too.  I know I've stretched my pouch-I can eat twice as much as 6-8 months ago, and even when I feel full, I keep looking for something sweet.  God how I wish I would get vialently ill, then maybe the switch would go off in my brain.  I'm not expecting any quick fixes, I just don't know what to do.  I go for my 2 year check up next month, and the last thing I want is to get a "look" from Dr Mo when he reads my chart.  I know I'm not on here much, but you are all like family to me, and I appreciate having so many ears to talk to.  Thanks everyone.

I'm not that far out so I don't have a lot of advice that is helpful but I can tell you I've been told that our pouches do stretch.

are you recording your food and fluid intake?
following pouch rules?
are you exercising?
taking your supplements?

do you want to go cold turkey back to what you should be doing or are you more of a give up one thing at a time kind of girl?

The only thing I am still doing is my supplements every day and exercising, but not regularly.  I do need to get back to that, and I am more of a one thing at a time girl.  When I first leanred about the things I would have to change after surgery, I started making the changes slowly months before I even knew if I'd be approved just because I knew I wouldn't be able to do everything at once.  Right now, I just don't know which change to start with.

 Oh honey it is never too late to get back on track!!! My friend was a lot like Carnie Wilson she lost a ton of weight and in less then two years gained 80% of it all back because she too didnt dump etc. But she, like Carnie, regained control of her pouch. She did the 5 day pouch test and I think that reshrinks your pouch and allows you to eat less. I am not sure I have never done it but a bunch of people on here have and I heard IT WORKS!!! It should be a start for you. Then do you attend any support groups? You should often honey it is ESSENTIAL!!! My Doc told me 10-20 pounds gained back after 18 months was normal. So dont beat yourself up just dont let it get beyond that. You CAN SUCCEED!!! YOU CAN OVERCOME THIS!!! Take control of it...............walk for atleast 30 minutes a day 3-4 days a week. I know its easier said then done but your heart rate going up will help you burn off those calories/carbs. Avoid the high sugar foods honey. I dont bring them in the house so I am not tempted. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!

And it doesnt matter how often you are or are not on here we are ALWAYS HERE TO HELP!!
(((((Hugs)))))) Keep your chin up and tomorrow is a NEW DAY....a FRESH NEW START!!!!

Thanks Jilly, you are always so encouraging!  I have heard about the pouch test, I will have to look it up.  I haven't been attending support group because of the distance, but Debbie just told me there is one right around the corner from me that I am going to look into.

 Your so welcome honey. We all have bad days and bad weeks and get the guilt etc. Your beautiful and you can turn things around. We are all here to help yah. (((Hugs))) Let me know how the 5 day pouch test works out. I heard it can really help and re shrinks your pouch. It may be mentally hard but WORTH IT in the end. I am glad there is a support group near you too. 

So sorry you have had to endure this pain. I know we all fall and at times it is hard to get back on track. I am sure you can do this. You have slipped and it is ok. Just start back slowly and with support and encouragement you will beat this carb monster. Good luck.

                                                                                                                      Julie

Thanks Julie

Sandi,

I am a person who needs as much support as I can get.  Once a month at York Vo Tech there is a support group meeting.  I try and attend every month.  I drove two hours to go to a support group at Barix two weeks ago and it was well worth the trip.  The meeting was 4 hours.  If you ever want to ride up with me, please let me know...I'd love the company.  I live in Red Lion, not too far from York.  There is a Pouch Party this Sunday at Nessa's house in Maryland.  If you would like to attend, please let me know and we can drive in together.  They're a lot of fun and it's an awesome group of people. 

Since I'm only five months out, I don't have a lot of advice to give to you, except that I've read going back to basics, starting with your meal replacement protein 3-4 times a day like we did preop helps to "detox" you from the sugar and hopefully get your pouch back on track.  You can do this!!!!!  We're all here to help support you in whatever way we can.

Blessings,

Debbie

Debbie,  I didn't know there was a support group at York Vo Tech-your talking about on Queen St?  When are the meetings.  That would be great for me because I had my surgery in MD, and it can be hard to get there.  What time is the party?  If hubby doesn't have to work I'd love to go.