Why did I say that??

Hi Everyone!  I posted several weeks go, right before my surgery, w/all sorts of questions-mostly b/c of my anxiety for the surgery.  Everyone was so helpful then, I'm hoping you'll give me some good advice for my current issue.

Ok, so I'm about 9 weeks out and 49 lbs down!!  Yeah!!  2 weeks ago I started this training course at the gym.  I hated it the first few days, but now I look forward to going!  So, since I've started, I've lost 13 lbs!!  So why is it, when somoneone congragulated me the first thing I said was "thanks, but I had gastric bypass in Jan".  Almost like I didn't really earn those pounds.  Another woman in the class has lost 8 and my initial thought was that she had earned it.   Why couldn't I have just said "Thanks, I feel great and I'm super excited"???? 

I wanted to see if anyone else had experienced this or had any feedback on how to get my head on straight.

Thanks,
Kelly

Hello I am sorry you had to deal with that. People are so cruel sometimes. I dont know how I would have reacted. I might have told her to MYOB. You have earned evry damn pound and more. Keep your head up and dont let anyone stand in your way..Roll On!!!!!! Some iggnorant people think wls is the lazy way to lose weight but I think it is a tool and you stillhave to work it and sometimes it seems harder.. Good Luck keep up the good work..

 

                                                       Julie

Hi Kelly,

I have done that too, discounted my accomplishments. However, it takes time to really get our heads around it all. Making the decision to have WLS is a courageous thing to do. But this tool does not work without a lot of hard work. We still need to monitor what we eat. We still need to work out like anyone else. It will take practice and time to simply say, Thank you and smile, when we get compliments. But you can do it! After all look how much you have done already getting to this point!

Congratulations on your accomplishments!

Debbie

Hi Kelly -

WOO-HOO!!!  49 pounds is AWESOME!!!!!!!  Now say, "Thanks, Tia, it's been a lot of hard work, but sooooo worth it!"  Because that IS the truth!

A lot of people have a hard time accepting compliments.  I think, in part, or my part anyway, we're so USED to failing at diets, weight loss programs, etc., that we're almost expecting to fail again.

Without expounding on anything, the next time someone compliments you, practice saying what I told you!!

It takes a long, long time for our heads to wrap around the reality of our weight loss.  Sometimes, therapy can be extremely helpful.  Often, it just takes time.

Hang in there, you're doing GREAT!

Hugs,

Tia

Remember feeling the anxiety before you had the surgery? It took alot of courage and love for yourself to do this. Just because you had gastric bypass does not mean that YOU are not losing the weight. It is helping of course, otherwise you wouldn't have gotten it, but it is done so that you will be successful completely, not just for a short period of time, which is how it usually goes. Just be happy that you did the right thing for yourself and enjoy the fruits of your labor. Good luck and you are doing awesome with your weight loss.

I don't know why we do that but we do.  I do the same thing with just about everything.  If someone compliments my blouse I have to tell them it was on sale at Kohls or whatever.  Can't just shut my mouth and say thank you.  I don't tell anyone about my surgery so when I get any kind of WL comments I do just say thank you and leave it at that.  This has worked out well for me.  But don't you ever forget you ARE earning every pound. 

I so get this.  I have not had surgery yet and I KNOW it's a tool and i know I have to WORK to make it work for me, and I KNOW IT"S NOT THE EASY WAY OUT  and yet, I still think that my loss will mean less because of the surgery than it would if i did it without.


I can't wrap my head around it.

Kelly,

I do exactly the same thing and then I kick myself because our weight loss is not an easy thing to do, we just have a really strong tool to help us out.

I have a really hard time accepting compliments, always have, but I'm practicing on just saying 'thank you" and leaving it at that.  Normally I argue that they are wrong.  *sigh*  Needed that brain surgery along with the RNY!! 

Heather

WOOT WOOT!  You rock Kelly!   Repeat after me "thanks Angie!" and smile!

You OWN each and every one of those 49 lbs that you lost. YOU did it, period.  So you had the HELP of a tool, that's up to you to disclose or not, but dont diminish what YOU have done.  Be PROUD of yourself gf!!!  We are proud of you!!!

Thank you everyone for your responses!!  You all have been very helpful.  I"m def going to work on saying just "thank you" and leaving it at that.