First day back to work...
(deactivated member)
on 8/6/08 1:33 am - Millersville, MD
on 8/6/08 1:33 am - Millersville, MD
and I'm not liking it. People are happy to see me, but most have no idea why I was gone. Those that do keep coming into my cube to "check me out." Just really not liking the attention for some reason. I have lost over 30 pounds since I saw them last, but honestly... it's not showing that much. You know how it works with obesity... I'm feeling it in my shoes, my hands, my boobs. But almost 40 pounds down and I haven't dropped a size yet (which I knew would be the case). I feel like those that know have some sort of expectation. I also hope they don't ask me constantly how much I have lost. Maybe eventually I will like telling them, but right now, I just hate answering questions.
Am I just being a bytch?
Am I just being a bytch?
If you're being a bytch, all I can say is I'm the Queen and welcome to my kingdom!!!! LOL!!!!
I only told a select few pre-op, including my boss, who ran her mouth, and I talked about it less when I came back.
I don't feel the need to answer anyone's questions, and if they're rude enough to ask, you COULD say, "Why would you ask me that?" They'll probably mumble something and slink off.
Again, don't feel obligated to anyone - it's your business and for me, it was a very private thing. I completely understand about their expectations, though - you feel like you're under a microscope and they're jus****ching/waiting for you to fail - because, of course, you've done weight loss programs before. Imagine their surprise and your delight as you continue to shrink!!
Just focus on you and let the rest of the chips fall where they may.
Hugs,
Tia
I only told a select few pre-op, including my boss, who ran her mouth, and I talked about it less when I came back.
I don't feel the need to answer anyone's questions, and if they're rude enough to ask, you COULD say, "Why would you ask me that?" They'll probably mumble something and slink off.
Again, don't feel obligated to anyone - it's your business and for me, it was a very private thing. I completely understand about their expectations, though - you feel like you're under a microscope and they're jus****ching/waiting for you to fail - because, of course, you've done weight loss programs before. Imagine their surprise and your delight as you continue to shrink!!
Just focus on you and let the rest of the chips fall where they may.
Hugs,
Tia
Pam:
I'm right there with you. I really don't appreciate the people that just come to check you out and then I never know if they are telling me the truth or not. I can't really tell a big difference. I do feel it in my clothes and have had to start buying 22/24's (from 26/28/30), so I know I'm loosing, but I've still got a long way to go. I also have to go out to lunch with suppliers, often, and it is sometimes embarrassing that I have to tell them why I am ordering a small portion or not eating much. Then they all say, oh I can tell that you have lost weight, you look great. To me, if their mouths don't drop wide open as soon as they see me, it's not much of an improvement (LOL). I'm on the bytch train today also!!!!
I'm right there with you. I really don't appreciate the people that just come to check you out and then I never know if they are telling me the truth or not. I can't really tell a big difference. I do feel it in my clothes and have had to start buying 22/24's (from 26/28/30), so I know I'm loosing, but I've still got a long way to go. I also have to go out to lunch with suppliers, often, and it is sometimes embarrassing that I have to tell them why I am ordering a small portion or not eating much. Then they all say, oh I can tell that you have lost weight, you look great. To me, if their mouths don't drop wide open as soon as they see me, it's not much of an improvement (LOL). I'm on the bytch train today also!!!!
Lisa Z.
When we believe, all things are possible!
Hi Pam,
It is totally understandble how you feel.....I am a SAHM and so I didn't have to go to work. But I had the attention from my friends and family that kept calling me and asking me what it seemed like every 2 to 3 days how much more I had lost. It really annoyed me too because I was not feeling comfortable with all the attention. The one thing that really got to me was when one particular person would call me on the phone and say hey wassup skinny??? OMG that was like pulling the back of my hair. One day i got pissed and let it out and said well why is it that when I was fat you didn't call my house saying Wassup Fatty? That stopped that person right away...
Anyway, Like Tia said don't feel obligated to answer the questions....
I hope it gets easier for you soon.
It is totally understandble how you feel.....I am a SAHM and so I didn't have to go to work. But I had the attention from my friends and family that kept calling me and asking me what it seemed like every 2 to 3 days how much more I had lost. It really annoyed me too because I was not feeling comfortable with all the attention. The one thing that really got to me was when one particular person would call me on the phone and say hey wassup skinny??? OMG that was like pulling the back of my hair. One day i got pissed and let it out and said well why is it that when I was fat you didn't call my house saying Wassup Fatty? That stopped that person right away...
Anyway, Like Tia said don't feel obligated to answer the questions....
I hope it gets easier for you soon.
I am who I am and accept my feelings wholeheartedly.
Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
Cira 249/144.0 current/goal 154/ 5'3" 10 lbs below my Dr's goal
I am almost 2 years out and they still come up and make comment to me. Some ask how much weight I have lost. Most just make comment about how I look. I have lost 190 lbs give or take from day to day. I am not losing any more so I wish they would stop asking me that. Plus here's my kicker......... I have worked here 25 years all but the last two years I was HUGE. 90% of all the men here couldn't even raise their eyes to say Good Morning to me as a large girl and now they hang at my desk and make every effort to speak to me. I am so nasty to them it's awful. My thought is I am still Margie, you couldn't talk to me then please do not waste my time and talk to me now. Is that awful? Anyway I got into a babble there. The other day I was thinking geesh when will these people and all people stop commenting on how much weight I have lost and how good I look, blah blah blah. And then I thought what's going to happen when they stop noticing and stop saying something, how is that going to feel. So my advice is to be proud of yourself, your decision and every pound you lose, hold your head up and shout it to the world because we should be proud. We made a huge decision to take control of our life and we are doing a great job. I do get tired of stating a number of how much I have lost cause I know then people will do the math and say DAMN how big was she. So I don't give a number I just say "quite a bit and still dropping".
Margie
Margie
Margie B
Pam,
Your expectations of your co-workers are more than realistic, but they don't seem to understand that you are not a side show for Ringling Brothers. Your experience today is exactly what I am most concerned about. I am leader in my business area and leading a big project, so it will not be easy to hide the difference in weight.
Over time, I think the newness will wear off and there will be something new to gather around and talk about. (hopefully) I hope tomorrow is a better day! Kim : )
Your expectations of your co-workers are more than realistic, but they don't seem to understand that you are not a side show for Ringling Brothers. Your experience today is exactly what I am most concerned about. I am leader in my business area and leading a big project, so it will not be easy to hide the difference in weight.
Over time, I think the newness will wear off and there will be something new to gather around and talk about. (hopefully) I hope tomorrow is a better day! Kim : )
Hi Kim!
Good to see you here! How are things going? I agree that there are things we just do not have to explain when co-workers ask. I remember 20 years ago I had lost a lot of weight and I felt so exposed when people were complimenting me, and the men started leering at me as well. It was a very odd feeling that I hadn't expected. I wanted everyone to back off.
Good to see you here! How are things going? I agree that there are things we just do not have to explain when co-workers ask. I remember 20 years ago I had lost a lot of weight and I felt so exposed when people were complimenting me, and the men started leering at me as well. It was a very odd feeling that I hadn't expected. I wanted everyone to back off.
(deactivated member)
on 8/6/08 6:40 am - Millersville, MD
on 8/6/08 6:40 am - Millersville, MD
Kim, I think our jobs are similar. That's exactly why I'm feeling the way I felt today. I wasn't at work 15 minutes when I had to go to project wide meeting (we call them Scrums) and I was called out as having returned to work and immediately people started telling me that I looked great, etc. I KNOW these are compliments, but then as I return to my cube, they followed me en masse. Oh well, the day is done and I'm about to leave. I'm going to chalk today up as me simply being a novelty item and hope that by Friday, I'm no longer anyone's fascination.
You know, my therapist strongly suggested to me that I should try to return to work on a Wednesday, so that I only had a short week to deal with and let me tell you... GREAT ADVICE!!!
You know, my therapist strongly suggested to me that I should try to return to work on a Wednesday, so that I only had a short week to deal with and let me tell you... GREAT ADVICE!!!
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