too ashamed

So I had an appt with my PCP to talk to him about the WLS. It didn't go so well. I was talking to him about some of my minor health issues. And he said he wants me to stop my metformin and he thinks that this is the cause. I asked him about my weight, and he said that I had lost 11 lbs since last year. OK 11 lbs is 11 lbs, but I have been on a 1500 cal a day diet and working my backside off at the gym. In this same my friend who is doing the same diet and exercising with me has lost over 50 lbs.  He said he wanted to draw some blood and see if there was anything endocrin (?) going on. If so we would treat it, if not then I needed to go to a 1200 cal a day diet. Ok for real I am starving now at 1500, I can't imagine 1200. Now I know after surgery that it will be really low calories, but my stomach won't be screaming FEED ME. (right?)  SO I was too ashamed to tell him I wanted to do the WLS. I just couldn't do it. I love my DR, and can normally tell him anything. REALLY. But today it was like, I could hear everyone who had every called me fat right there in my head, and I just couldn't say it to him.  I need to tell him because I signed up to go to DR. Roe's next information session.  So now I don't know what to do. I need to talk to him.

Why not write him a letter.... Sometimes it is easier to express yourself in that manner. I have done that before, and it got my doctor's attention.

Dee, I agree with Aime.  Tell him how you feel about everything.  It will let him know how you feel and it'll make you feel better.   Chin up...just remember you're doing this for you/your health.

 

BEST OF LUCK. IT IS HAR. BUT MY MIND WAS MADE UP, THIS IS WHAT I WANT! DR ROE IS GREAT. I HAD SURGERY 3 WEEKS AGO AND I FEEL GREAT. AND 17LBS GONE!!! THAT IS A PLUS 

Write a letter or send a fax (or email, if you have it).  There've been a couple of times when I didn't think a doctor was "getting" what I was trying to say.  I'm a much better writer than I am a talker, so I just laid out my case in writing, then followed up a few days later.  Most doctors appreciate an informed, articulate patient.  They really do!!  You make their job so much easier.  I did this with my surgeon re band v. RNY because we'd left things hanging after the appointment, and from what I understand, they're asking for the insurance approval on the band, which is what I want.  Good luck.

You are the issue, NOT Him. Tell him!! Maybe he will understand and maybe he wont but its your choice either way. There are always going to be those you dont want to talk to about it because you dont want to disappoint them or have them make you feel silly for wanting it.  & I dont believe you told us your startign weight (I understand that is no ones businessBUT) maybe you arnt being realstic about needing RNY and he could help with the decision, I just cant imagine if you aer truly in need he wouldnt want what is best for you!!! Good luck Diana RNY 9/17/03 Dr. Roe 260/196/still aiming for 180

Thank you all for your advice. I have to call Monday to make a follow up once my bloodwork is back.  My weight fluctuates (sp?) greatly. I tend to stay put at around 270lbs. But in any given week I can be as low as 260 or as high as 290. Yesterday I was 267 down from his last weight for me which was 278.  Ironically today I weighed 275. BTW I am 5 ft 8 inches. My bmi is at 40.

Dee, Either in writing or in person you need to step and let him know what you are thinking.   He might disagree or he might agree, but either way, he needs to know or he won't take any action at all. In this process you are going to need to fight for what you want.   Your insurance company is going to fight you, your PCP might fight you, your family and/or friends might fight you...heck your own body might fight you in this process.   You need to get yourself to the point where you don't really care what others say because you know this is the correct thing for you to do. Really, until you get to that point, everything else is academic.   When you have your appointment with Dr. Roe, you are also going to meet his office staff.   They will help you in the process but in the end it will be up to you to make sure things keep moving along.  So get used to speaking up and asking for what you want.   Also get comfortable with the idea that if someone tells you no, you may need to find another person to deal with.   I have seen people change PCP's and even surgeons because of negative repsonses or an unwillingness to help. This is a serious step.   If you are serious, pull your sleeves up, steel yourself for a little rejection, and go for it.   If not...then wait until you are serious! 

Best of luck with your PCP and with your appointment with Dr. Roe.

 

Thank you! Wow that last post really helped me a lot! I do need to put my hard hat on and make my buisness known!  Then today I got a call and a message on  my machine, that all my bloodwork was normal, and he still wants me to follow up with an endocrinologist to see if they can determine if there is a reason as to why I am eating so little and still not loosing.  So should I call and say no- and just tell him I want to do the WLS, or do you think that the endocrinologist is a good step anyway? I mean if all my bloodwork is normal then why go, but if they can't find a reason, then maybe that would be a positive thing for the insurance when we submit for approval right?  I really do appreciate all the help I have gotten here, It means so much coming from those who have been or are on this journey .