Happy Monday.....Tuesday.....???

Okay, well, it's Tuesday, but it feels like a Monday, but since I'm trying to take off on Friday, not really sure what day it is!!!! Looks like everyone had a good couple of days! Let's see, I was off on Friday, should've cleaned, went shopping and to lunch with Mom. Saturday, we had the kids, went to Friday's for lunch to the movies to see Open Season - it was okay, but I did sneak in a 15 minute nap!!! and then went to the mall, which was horrendously crowded, to get haircuts for the kids. There was an hour wait, which, when I'm with the kids, could be REALLY expensive, so we left. Went back to Gary's, did a couple of things, laundry, dinner, etc., and got home around 8. Drank some pumpkin spice hot tea (my new fave addiction), and hit the hay. Sunday, had the baseball bat feeling to my ovaries - AGAIN!, so I didn't go to the zoo. But it was okay, Gary took KB and K's friend, and they had a blast!!! Since I felt better later in the day, met them over the mall, got their haircuts, and tried, unsuccessfully, to find K pants. Since she's heavy but not tall, 4'11", I have to buy her capris to fit like pants. Kind of hard to find capris this time of year. Did find some in the Lane Bryant catalog, so that might work. It doesn't help that she hates anything at her waist and REFUSES to wear jeans. Went to Five Guys Burgers & Fries, ate half a burger, which was sooooo good. I laugh now, because before, I probably could've eaten 2 doubles!!!! What a nice change!! Monday, up early, rode with Gary to Westminster to pick up Kaity's flute. Gary submitted the paperwork, but forgot to sign it. Ugh! He is sooo unorganized, partly from being overwhelmed, but partly from being unorganized. It makes me nuts!! So we had to drive all the way to Westminster so Kaity could have her flute today. We did have lunch, Mom's treat, at Lonestar Steakhouse - OMG! It was sooooo good, I got the garlic medallions, which were 3 really tender nuggets and 3 garlic shrimp, w/salad and garlic mashed potates. I only had about 2 bites of the potatoes, they were good. And the steak was sooo tender, I had no problem eating there. If you've never been there, it's just like Outback. Then, and I'm so happy about this - we went to Macy's, where I bought what I like to call "L'il Red," my new 325 watt Kitchenaid Artisan mixer. Terry and I talked about it and I really wanted the Holy Grail of Mixers, the 575 watt, but I only use the big stand mixer during the holidays, so I didn't want to pay in excess of $350!! But I love it - Mom said I should get silver, so it would match everything, but I liked the festiveness of the red. Plus, in my dream world and in my dream kitchen, NOTHING will be on the counters, including appliances, so it won't have to match. Right, Tia, keep dreaming!!! Okay, well, I guess I'd better earn my pay - a little. Hope everyone has a great day! Terry, take the comforter to a good tailor, they may be able to fix/hide the damage. Sorry that happened to you! Purple - it does a body/mind good!!! Tia

Good Morning!!! It's my last day at work!! I do the prep tomorrow afternoon, but the morning will be spent doing laundry and some last minute cleaning and shopping. My parents are taking my children to Connecticut for the weekend, but they'll be spending the nights with them starting tomorrow so I have to make sure they have enough clean clothes!! I am seriously stressed out at work and trying to get so much done! My manager has been wonderful and keeps telling me to do what I can and she can do the rest while I'm gone! It's so nice to have that kind of support! I told I would like to have weekly conference calls to keep up with what's going on and she refused!! She said I could call her to say hi, but she will not answer any of my work questions. She's so wonderful. Tia - sounds like you had a busy weekend!! Glad you enjoyed it and hopefully you'll get to take Friday off! Terry - I second the idea of a tailor! They should be able to fix it up no problem. Purple is also my favorite color!!! Ok - gotta go get back to work. See you all later. Yvette

Hey Yvette - Wow! It's coming up quick, isn't it??? The prep truly wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I wouldn't want to do it every day, but.... That's great that your parents are taking the kids. I'm sure you'll miss them, but you'll need to focus on you for a little while. IMHO, family support makes ALL the difference. Try not to stress about work too much, it'll all be there when you get back. It's nice that your supervisor is so understanding. I really can't say I like my job, but I'm just hanging in there - I can retire in 9 years. Not sure I'll be able to afford to do so, but it's nice knowing I can if I want!!! So, do what you can, and leave the rest. You're going to need your mental energy, too, since wls affects all aspects of our lives. Be kind to yourself!!! Yep, just found out I can take off Friday AND Monday!!! WOO-HOO!! Glad to see we've met another Purple Princess!!! Take care and we'll talk before 10/12, I'm sure!!! Tia

Yvette, I just wanted to let you know that you'll be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow. Take Care & See You on the Losing Side! Terry

Good morning Tia. I am off to a great start today. Been busy. Some days it can really be a juggling act to keep up with all the conference calls, meetings, trips and emails flying my way. But I love it! I got up again this morning to do my strength training. I really did NOT want to get up. I wanted to sleep. But I would not allow myself to take off the day since I know I would have felt terrible about it. I worked on my arms this morning. I think I have torn a muscle in my left arm. It has been hurting for about three months now and when I did my overhead exercises it was really quite painful. But I worked through it. I may have to try to go see the doc if it doesn't improve soon. I expect my arms to be a bit sore later today. I forgot my walking shoes. I still have to walk to the bank and post office at lunch so I'll still get in about a mile walk. Did 2.5 miles yesterday! It felt sooo good. I really have to vent for a minute. I hope y'all don't mind. I am going to spill some ugly truth here but oh well. I don't really have a place I can go to get this off my chest. I hate money! Or the lack of. It is quite frustrating to be living paycheck to paycheck. I went last night to get my daughter some new glasses. She has really bad eyesight, meaning thick lenses. We went to dr.s visionworks to get their 2 pair for $99 since we really need to do this cheaply right now. We had a hard time finding frames for $69.95 or less which is the requirement for the sale. They said I could just pay the difference if the frames were over that price. Okay, so we settled on two pair that were nice. One pair were regular full frames, the other were rimless on the bottom. The lady told us that her lenses would be really think with those and we would have to go with the polycarbonate. Well, that's an additional $30. I didn't want to go there so we chose another frame. Then the next sales person said that we really should go with the polycarbonate because the plastic are going to be really thick. The first person didn't say that, she just commented about the rimless ones. Again he offered polycarbonate at $30 extra each. So her glasses would come to $210 with tax. We have to get the glasses and I don't think that another place would be any cheaper even with my insurance. I might try to call today to ask but I just don't think it'll happen. Here's is my frustration...we are going to be so broke after all of this and payday won't come until the 31st, a very long 18 days between checks this time. I am so tired of this. We can never seem to get out of this ugly cycle. I don't mean to air our dirty laundry here, especially since this is totally off topic. But we have debt up to our ears and are not getting anywhere with it. My husband seems to think that by the middle of November he can adjust when we pay some of the bills and hopefully balance things out so that from the middle of the month to the end we aren't so strapped. I have to cancel my hair appt because we are going to be so tight until the first of November. I spent money this past weekend that I really should not have spent. I am just tired of this merry-go-round that we are stuck on. Help I can't get off!! My husband has come up with a plan to begin paying off the bills, one at a time starting in November. It will take a lot of time and a really strict budget. Then we have Meghan's b-day coming up and Christmas too. Just very frustrating. Thanks for listening to me vent. I hope I haven't offended anyone by being so completely off topic here. I just needed to "talk" about this to someone. I just pray that very soon we will break this cycle and get things under control. Have a wonderful day y'all. Hugs, Robin

Robin - I truly feel your pain! We were there a few years ago and it took a long to get out of debt! The biggest thing we did was come up with a plan and then put it in God's hands. He got us through it somehow. It always seemed when we were about out of our problems the car broke down or something else came up that cost what we had saved, but we always got through and I truly say that God helped us so much through that rough time. There are some tax free options availalbe for medical expenses not covered by insurance if you or your husband's companies offer them. It's called Flexible Savings. It allows you to put up to $5000 (annually) pre-tax money into an account and when you have an expense you can request the money be sent to you for you to pay the bill or as a "refund". It helps in a couple of different ways, 1. the amount you opt to put into the account reduces your taxable income so you pay less in taxes; 2. You have a fund of money set aside just for medical purposes. You can use it to pay for eye glasses or contacts, eye exams, dr. co-pays, over the counter medicines, prescriptions, cost of durable medical equipment, etc. I have been using this for about 8 years and it has been a life saver! The trick is to not put too much in because you will lose the money if it's not used. Ok, the other option is to really buckle down and stick to your budget, but be sure your budget allows for an occassional treat (dinner out, clothes, etc.) and do not feel the need to spend a lot of extra on your daughter at her birthday and at Christmas. We set a specific budget for each kid and they get what we can get for them for that amount. Right now it's $100 for Christmas and $50 for birthdays. Occassionally we go over a little, but not much and try not to do it often. Ok, the "sermon" is over.....I just wanted to share my experiences with the same problem! Both my DH and I now make enough money that we don't have those worries anymore and it's really nice and I know you will get there as well.....it just takes time! See you later..... Yvette

Yvette, Thank you so much. It is encouraging to know that someone else has made it through this type of thing. I know we need to be more careful about how we spend our money. I (obviously) have not been good at sticking to a budget. We will really have to plan for this Christmas and really stick to our guns. I know my kids will be appreciative no matter what, they are really understand. Since they are older (teens) we have explained to them that we have to stick to a budget. They are really great about it. Thanks again Robin

Hey Robin - Glad it's busy for you - it can help keep your mind off of other things....somewhat. Good for you for working out - I know from experience that it's a great stress reliever, but don't overdo it on the arm, you don't want to cause permanent damage. As far as venting, please don't apologize. I feel so blessed to have met all of you - besides my wonderful (sometimes) family and my bgf, Lisa, I feel closer to all of you than anyone else. I guess because, first of all, I've met most of you and know personally how wonderful you are, and secondly, because we're all in this boat together. So please, don't feel like you have to apologize for talking to your friends. Having said that, I feel your money, or lack thereof, pain, and have posted my frustrations before. Whoever said money can't buy happiness lied! Well, maybe it SHOULDN'T buy happiness, but I for one am much happier knowing my bills are paid, my family's taken care of, and there's some money left over for emergencies or just 'cause. I really wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but coupled with some bad monetary decisions in the past, my propensity to want to spend, and trying to help my brother with the kids' expenses, I, too, live paycheck to paycheck, trust me, even though I've worked for the State for 20+ years, it's NOT a big paycheck. It's not a pretty feeling, and I know you're frustrated because as I see it, you're not complaining that you don't have money to party, you need the money to LIVE!!! As far as your daughter's glasses, give Wal-Mart a try, that's where I get my contacts from. Or, maybe United Optical, my Mom gets hers there. Vision plans are hard to understand sometimes, but maybe either of those would be better choices. Actually, and I'm not sure which daughter it is, but is she old/responsible enough to wear contacts? I've worn glasses since I was 12 (ICK - fat and glasses!), and contacts since I was 18. I have incredibly bad eyesight, too, but the contacts have helped my self-esteem sooo much. I get the Acuvue disposables from Wal-Mart, and I love them. I buy a six month supply at a time, and they're wonderful! I just throw them away every 30 days or so, and pop in a fresh pair. That may be an option for her, too. I know your hubby was out of work for a while, which I know from personal experience, can quickly deplete you, financially and emotionally. Christmas makes it that much harder!!! It's bad enough having to scrimp during the year, but at Christmas, it makes it even worse. I know, I know, it's not what Christmas is supposed to be about, but it's so hard, especially when Christmas is rammed down our throats from July on. I LOVE (not) all those magazine articles that say you don't have to spend a lot on Christmas! What planet are they on? As the kids get older, their presents get smaller and more expensive!!!! I don't know about you, but I am horribly guilty of spending money I don't have at Christmas. Every year, we say we're not going to spend as much, but I have to confess, and I feel selfish, but I LOVE to give presents, and I like getting them, too! I know, I sound like I'm 5, but I do. I like knowing someone thought enough of me to buy me something I'd like - not that they have to spend a lot, but the thought, you know? Trust me, even if you think your girls don't realize that money's tight, they do know. I remember my father being laid off so many times at Christmas, but somehow, it all worked out. If it helps a little, try to focus on the non-money part - baking cookies together - yeah, that can be expensive, but you can't eat a lot, so you don't need to bake a lot!!! If you've never made molded chocolates, it can be a lot of fun - messy, but fun!!! And that doesn't have to be expensive, a little goes a long way!!! Every year, since we have a fake tree, we go to a Christmas tree lot and my Mom "steals!" tree parts off the ground. She's a little insane, so I let her go - and then she comes home and plops the parts into a vase! Instant Christmas smell! I'm sure your church will be celebrating Christmas the way it's supposed to be celebrated, and I know all of you will be participating in that, too! It can be fun and while it doesn't have to be expensive, somehow Christmas always is. Again, I wish I had some words of wisdom, but I trust that you'll do the best that you can for your girls. I know you have strong faith, too, which, hopefully, will help sustain you. And you have us, your LOSER friends, too!!!! It sounds like you have a plan to get back on track, and while it might be painful, I know you're committed to making it work. I'll keep all of you in my thoughts, which is what I know you want. And I promise, if I win the lottery, I'll help you!!! So say a prayer, too, for me - maybe we'll hit it big!!! Yeah, right!!! Anyway, don't worry about it, just come to us whenever you need to! We love ya!! Tia

Thank you so much Tia. I just love you all too. I feel the same way about this group. I have made a few friends since moving to MD but I feel so close to y'all. Our church is doing some great things for Christmas and the holidays. It'll be really nice. We do a ladies Christmas tea...hey, would you and your mom like to come with me? It's open to anyone we invite. We are also doing a great Christmas program that I am in. It's a lot of fun already and we are just getting our scripts. I love this time of year and I will not allow lack of funds to keep me in a "scrooge" mood. I also love to give gifts. It makes me feel so good to be able to do that. We will just have to think smaller this year. Thanks for making me laugh. You are too funny! I love it. We will be fine. Won't be easy but we will come through this! I'll say a prayer for you and the lottery! Hugs, Robin

Yes, thank you, we'd LOVE to have a spot o'tea with you!!! Just let me know when/where! So, in this Christmas program, are you a shepherd or a sheep? A wise woman? A (gasp) virgin? Bad Tia! If you need a donkey, I'll gladly donate my a$$ of an ex-husband!!!! I figured your church would do something like this - that's a problem with the Catholic church - everything's run by the Archdiocese and there's not a whole lot of congregation participation. But it's what I've grown up with, know, feel comfortable with...but Terry's church is involved a lot like yours is, and I know she takes a great deal of enjoyment in their activities (sometimes!). BTW, the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade is bringing an exhibit to Columbia Mall on Sunday, 11/12, I think from 12-2. Gary & I are taking the kids, so maybe you can meet us there, since I'm assuming it's pretty close to you. Talk soon! Tia