Sabotaging myself

Hi All,

Sorry its been awhile and here I come with my issue.

Lots of things have happened, including getting laid off Feb 1st and right now I am without insurance until I figure out what I am eligable for.

Okay so my highest weight was 255 and I am at 180 lbs, surgery was June 1st. In January I lost 8 lbs and in Feb so far, maybe 2.  I am not eating right, I am not mindful eating, its all just falling apart and i worry that I have stretched my pouch. I need a cyber slap to get back on track.  

Should I go back to stage 3 or 4 and see if I can get myself going again?

Are there any support groups locally that I can attend rather than go into Tufts in Boston once a month?  I really want to make this work and I want to lose 30 more pounds and my anniversary date is creeping up (June 1st) and I want to really finish this.

Any tips and ideas would be great. I am doing better at all the pills but haven't really incorporated exercise into the mix on a regular basis, but when I did start to try that that is when my appetite went up.  I am happy to be in a size 14/16 and digging out the old clothes is fun, I just need to get back into it and I can't wrap my head around it lately.

Also, I know some here have had marriages end after weight loss and I feel that I am headed in that direction as well . I have only been married (2nd) since July 07 and he who admonished me and my weight, now weighs over 350 lbs and that is part of the problem, I need to try and have people around me who want to eat healthy and take walks and he is not interested at all. At almost 49, I don't want to be wasting my life with someone that isn't interested in helping.

Sorry so long.....

Lori

Ok, deep breath!

Sorry about your job.  That sucks.

You have not ruined your pouch.  It's not too late to turn this around.  Protein first.  Protein first.  Protein first.  I don't know what the stages are...I didn't have those, but i don't see why you can't stick to solids and protein shakes. 

There is no "finish" to this journey - it's a lifelong committment.  Do whatever you can to get back into the groove so that you don't feel like you are on a diet, but rather have just chosen a new life path. 

I'm not sure where you live, but I know my hospital (newton-wellesley) has support groups open to whoever shows up.  Just check their website for dates.

My relationship did not survive this transition... it was not strong enough beforehand and he had his own eating disorder, so my increased health and control over food was really hard for my ex to take.  Not our only issue, but everything did get worse.... i find i don't tolerate unhealthy people very well now.  I have to put myself first.

Good luck and keep posting!  I always tell people that I stick with the winners by visiting OH daily.

Lori, sorry you are feeling down.  It might also be winter blahs creeping in.  I think that any hospital's support groups might be open to anybody - at least they should be!     Do you think writing down what you are eating would help you?

 Hi Lori:

Sorry to hear about your job and your stresses.

I attend a support group in East Bridgewater which meets once a month - that group also is a group on obesityhelp.com

You may also check out overeatersanonymous or oa.org for more support (no joining fee - your meeting fee is determined by you - there are free telephone & online meetings)

Kerry

Hi ! Sue is right - life long committment !! And YOU need to focus on you !! You are dealing with a lot and need support - your hospital should have a group and you are VERY welcome at the Bridgewater one that Kerri mentioned. We actually meet tonite - PM if you are able to make it and want the details !!!

Either way - we are here for you on the Boards !! 

Thanks for the support and suggestions. The "finish" comment was more about the first year being the easist and I wanted to get to my goal weight by then, I can see now rereading how that came off kinda wierd.

Today I had a CIB shake and until dinner I plan on just some tuna, cottage cheese and half a serving of wheat thins and mandarin oranges. Dinner will be protein and a veggie.  Okay day 1 of the redo I think is in progress.

I think Bridgewater and Newton for me are just as far as Boston, I think there are some folks who had surgery in Lowell so I will see if they have meetings. 

I am going to try and check in more often and be more supportive as well :-)