Had my first "What If" moment.....HELP!!!!
Hello all!
Okay, so I am more of a blogger.....mainly because I am long winded.
My long story short is that I am presurgery, with a date of 4-27-09 at Tufts-NEMC. I am happy that I decided to go there, happy with my decision on RNY, and so happy that the internet is around for research and moral support. And to spew copious amounts of words on paper.
BUT......Last night I had a dream that I was in surgery and the hookup from the pouch to my intestines wasnt right. I don't remember a ton of detail, just a baaad feeling and a what if this really happens scary moment when I woke up.
Has anyone else had a moment like this? I know that this surgery is good for me, because it will help with my health issues. I know this surgery is good for me because it will give me the ability to be more active and STAY HEALTHY.
But I am really nervous, and I hate having had that dream, because it scares the bejeesus out of me. I know how serious this surgery is. I wanted to be a nurse when I was younger, and so I am familiar with the medical jargon.
I dont feel like I am doubting myself at all, I am just terrified of complications, and I think this dream brought it to the surface.....Anyone with insight, help, words of encouragement, Please could you help me out?
Thank yo so very much!
SW
Okay, so I am more of a blogger.....mainly because I am long winded.
My long story short is that I am presurgery, with a date of 4-27-09 at Tufts-NEMC. I am happy that I decided to go there, happy with my decision on RNY, and so happy that the internet is around for research and moral support. And to spew copious amounts of words on paper.
BUT......Last night I had a dream that I was in surgery and the hookup from the pouch to my intestines wasnt right. I don't remember a ton of detail, just a baaad feeling and a what if this really happens scary moment when I woke up.
Has anyone else had a moment like this? I know that this surgery is good for me, because it will help with my health issues. I know this surgery is good for me because it will give me the ability to be more active and STAY HEALTHY.
But I am really nervous, and I hate having had that dream, because it scares the bejeesus out of me. I know how serious this surgery is. I wanted to be a nurse when I was younger, and so I am familiar with the medical jargon.
I dont feel like I am doubting myself at all, I am just terrified of complications, and I think this dream brought it to the surface.....Anyone with insight, help, words of encouragement, Please could you help me out?
Thank yo so very much!
SW
Silently Weeping
242/226/145/140
Dr Sunny Shah -Tufts NEMC Boston MA
RNY ~Surg Date 4/27/09
242/226/145/140
Dr Sunny Shah -Tufts NEMC Boston MA
RNY ~Surg Date 4/27/09
Nervous is normal! I think everyone comes down with a case of the "what ifs"... I was eerily calm, but maybe that was just cuz my anti-anxiety meds were working. Just have faith in yourself and your doctors... you're going to be just fine!
Read my blog, BARIATHLETE I run because I can.
First 5K race October 4, 2009 (34.59) PR 5/22/11 (27:26)
First 5 Mile: January 1, 2011 (50:30)
First 10K: July 4, 2010 (1:03.26) New PR 4/10/11 (1:01.14)
First 10 Mile: April 11, 2010 (1:46.15)
First 1/2 marathon: June 13, 2010 (2:22.21) PR: 5/1/11 (2:17.30)
First Marathon: October 16, 2011: 5:47:20
Goofy Challenge: January 7-8, 2012
If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you're right. - Mary Kay Ash
First 5K race October 4, 2009 (34.59) PR 5/22/11 (27:26)
First 5 Mile: January 1, 2011 (50:30)
First 10K: July 4, 2010 (1:03.26) New PR 4/10/11 (1:01.14)
First 10 Mile: April 11, 2010 (1:46.15)
First 1/2 marathon: June 13, 2010 (2:22.21) PR: 5/1/11 (2:17.30)
First Marathon: October 16, 2011: 5:47:20
Goofy Challenge: January 7-8, 2012
If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you're right. - Mary Kay Ash
Hi SW....
Congrats on your upcoming life change!! Its just right around the corner for you and the closer that you get, the more nervous you will be.
This is very normal and extremely common. We all had doubts, hesitations, nightmares etc.
You will second third and fourth guess your decision, even after you have the surgery. I really believe after reading all the posts that most of us go thru this.
Hang in there....just go to sleep dreaming what your new life will be like. The energy you will have. The health you will have. Its all good.....just take it one day at a time.
The bad dreams will still happen unfortunately..its just a normal response to anxiety that you are having...mine actually changed after the surgery..now I dream that Ive gained all my weight back and failed at this tool...ugg!!
Please let me know if you need anything or if I can answer any questions for you. We are all here for you.
Good things are coming!
kim
Congrats on your upcoming life change!! Its just right around the corner for you and the closer that you get, the more nervous you will be.
This is very normal and extremely common. We all had doubts, hesitations, nightmares etc.
You will second third and fourth guess your decision, even after you have the surgery. I really believe after reading all the posts that most of us go thru this.
Hang in there....just go to sleep dreaming what your new life will be like. The energy you will have. The health you will have. Its all good.....just take it one day at a time.
The bad dreams will still happen unfortunately..its just a normal response to anxiety that you are having...mine actually changed after the surgery..now I dream that Ive gained all my weight back and failed at this tool...ugg!!
Please let me know if you need anything or if I can answer any questions for you. We are all here for you.
Good things are coming!
kim
(deactivated member)
on 3/14/09 10:50 pm, edited 3/19/09 2:05 am - Togo
on 3/14/09 10:50 pm, edited 3/19/09 2:05 am - Togo
You are going to love the rny. The first few weeks you will have things come up that are quite normal. Nothing to be concerned about. But the weight will just melt off you. Two years from the wls you will look like you are the daughter of the woman you are now. I mean that truly. When I showed people my before and after picture they couldn't beleive they were both of me. They said they thought the after picture was my daughter. I actually had a better body, (after having abdominoplasty too) than I did when I was in my twenties.
Don't be worried. Your dream is just a reflection of normal anxiety.
My mother was a nurse. As a matter of fact she was a Director of Nursing. And with the knowledge she had of the medical field she often had concerns about things that others didn't just because she knew so much. Concerns that never panned out.
Relax. You are going to be so happy that you got the rny !!!
Don't be worried. Your dream is just a reflection of normal anxiety.
My mother was a nurse. As a matter of fact she was a Director of Nursing. And with the knowledge she had of the medical field she often had concerns about things that others didn't just because she knew so much. Concerns that never panned out.
Relax. You are going to be so happy that you got the rny !!!
The night before my surgery, my husband came into our office and found me crying in front of my computer. He asked what was wrong. somehow I stumbled across the forum that that had all these WLS obituaries in it. It was so sad. My husband said that that was not the time to read those pages and gently led me to bed.
It is major surgery. Your concerns are real. The results are worth it.
Jayne
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for replying!
I am still scared, and nervous....part of that is me sucking at waiting. I am sure I will cry and ask what if some more but I am so grateful to have this outlet and such wonderful people to talk to, in addition to my program at Tufts.
The more I think about it and the more I talk about it, I know it is the right decision at the right time. But it's still scary. I am glad to know I am normal for worrying.
Thank you again everyone!!!!!
I am still scared, and nervous....part of that is me sucking at waiting. I am sure I will cry and ask what if some more but I am so grateful to have this outlet and such wonderful people to talk to, in addition to my program at Tufts.
The more I think about it and the more I talk about it, I know it is the right decision at the right time. But it's still scary. I am glad to know I am normal for worrying.
Thank you again everyone!!!!!
Silently Weeping
242/226/145/140
Dr Sunny Shah -Tufts NEMC Boston MA
RNY ~Surg Date 4/27/09
242/226/145/140
Dr Sunny Shah -Tufts NEMC Boston MA
RNY ~Surg Date 4/27/09
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