Hello all. Long read

Hey everyone. I am new to the boards. My wife pointed them out to me to maybe get a little support, help, tips, etc from you guys. Here is a little about myself. I am 29, married, one son, and work as an Orthopedic Surgical Tech in the Boston area. I started out in 2005 with the Lahey weight loss clinic to get into the program for bypass surgery. Long story short the asked me to lose some weight (75-100) before surgery. Tried liquid diet and that was a psychological nightmare. Started WW and ended up breaking my leg playing softball so that ended that try. So this past July I said "screw it. I am gonna start WW, lose the weight, and show up to the clinic at the weight I need to be at and show them I don't need the liquid diet". So I lose roughly 50 pounds between july and September by just WW, no exercise besides paintball once a week. They say great, come to the all day info session and we'll work things out. I have a date for 1/4/07 for bypass. So between September and now I am down 82 pounds. So here is the sticky part. Everyone I talk to can't understand why I want to still have the surgery, especially my wife, and I can't say I have a true answer when I am asked that. My parents are the same way but I am 29 so I am obviously old enought but still. My Dad is a black and white kinda guy, my Mom, is well, my Mom. My in laws are supportive, Mom more than Dad, but supportive. What I feel is good for me is good for her. So my wife understands where I am coming from, but is still set on me doing WW till whenever instead of surgery. My feeling is that I need the surgery to help me get to my goal, not a solution. She is more worried about the bad, rightfully so. I would like to hear about any stories, tips, opinions, suggestions, whatever. Thanks for your time.

only you can decide what's best for you. If i could lose 50 pounds on WW, i probably wouldn't have surgery, but i cant lose worth a dime. i've really never been overweight all my life either. the weight crept on after the birth of my kids. i'm 44 now, and i'm around 80-100 pounds overweight. i have no energy to exercise and i fail at every diet. i may lose 20 pounds tops, but then i gain it back. have you gone to the seminars? i've learned that it's a disease. i'm even afraid of losing the weight and gaining it back. i need a jump start to lose weight. once i see the scale move in the right direction, i will be more encouraged to excersice. my husband is overweight too but he's extremely active. he rides his bike, lifts weights and is constantly on the go. not me. i want to be able to at least walk the damn dog! lol. good luck in whatever you chose and keep us all informed.

I should've also added that I started at 444 and now down to 363.

I should also add that I started at 444 and now down to 362.

Thomas, Yes, it's your decision. Do you want it? It sounds like you do. My primary was always against me having the surgery and even said to me last week (I'm down 90 pounds in 10 months), "you could have done this on your own." I was a bit tweaked off to say the least. But what I did say to her was, "I guess you've never been fat and lived in a a fat person's body." She didn't answer. Why not consult a doctor? There are a lot of great ones out there. My surgeon was Dr. Randall from Lawrence Memorial in Medford. He has a wonderful relationship with his patients and does a monthly support group that's standing room only. Think on this. It's your life and your body. Peridot

hi. me again. yes, you probably should have stated that you started at 444 lbs! lol. my thing too is that it is a disease and "we" as obese people cannot keep it off. we may be able to lose it, but the keeping it off is just out of the questions. With the surgery though, we ALWAYS have the tool to go back to if we "God forbid" gain the weight back. Do you know what I mean? Then, yes, I think you should have the surgery. Most people just "dont understand". my husband is supportive, but my mother on the other hand is nervous!. every surgery has "dangers". my mother had her eyes lifted because she wanted too. there was danger in that. see, they don't see that. we need this surgery TO SAVE OUR LIFE. Thank God i am healthy on the other hand, but what am I going to do., wait until im 600 pounds and unhealthy? no. i want the second half of my life to be free of fat. i'm not in it to be a sex symbol, just healthy enough! GO FOR IT. your worth it.

Hi there and welcome. I guess my take on it comes from personal experience. I too lost like 45pds on WW, low carb etc...but it all came back and then some. Remember this a tool it helps you, you still have plenty of work to do. I truly don't believe I could have lost the 175 pds that I want/need to lose with WW or any other program besides this surgery. The big question is how do you feel about it? Do you feel you can do it w/o this surgery? It's a HUGE commitment either way. Who in your family can relate to the issue w/ weight? health problems? It's hard to say until you walk in our shoes what they would do. I did it for me and no one else. Yes I know that certain members of my family were scared for me and believed that I could do it w/o surgery but what they believe and I believe are 2 totally different things. I know me better than anyone and darn it I am worth living a wonderful life. Good luck to you. Gwen

I am working on getting a lap band surgery. I have done well losing weight in the past. I am thinking about 3 years out. I have always gained the weight back. It has varied over the years how fast I gained it back but it has a always returned + 10-20 lbs. I am going for the lap band because it is less invasive, no malabsorption. I wish I made this deciscion 10 years ago. Good Luck with whatever choice you make.. Sean

Hi Thomas, The decision is yours but let me tell you a little story. I have spent my life off and on WW. I have lost as much as 98 pounds but I always gain it back and more. Right now I am at my highest weight and at the end of my rope. I am doing WW now and am scheduled for WLS on 1/5/07 I am losing and everyone I know says that I should not do it. Well guess qhat I am going to do it and I am doing it because it is a tool to help me succeed in reaching my goal weight. I know that it is not the answer and I know that you can gain the weight back but if you continue with the WW after WLS then you have 18 months of losing weight with results to reprogram youself. Hopefully you will make the right decision for yourself and you will be happy with your choice. Think long and think hard this is going to change your's and your family's life. Best Wishes

Hi Tom, The statistic that I keep referring to (although I don't remember where exactly I got it but my doctor did confirm it) is that people who have more than 100 lbs to lose and try to lose it, 95% will fail. "Fail" means you will either not lose it all, or lose it but regain it. I have never been a lucky person in life, and I don't feel comfortable thinking that I can be in the 5% that succeed without surgical intervention. Hope this helps your decision. Kathleen