MO and the teenage years

 I want to ask all of you who suffered with morbid obesity (or close to it) as a teen.young adult.  As a teen/YA did your parents try to intervene and encourage you to lose weight? And if so, how?

Were you responsive to their efforts? Or did you resent it it?

A friend is having a hard time with her teen who is 285 lbs at 17.  I know what I went thru, I wonder what the rest of you thought. 

I was MO as a teen.  My parents didn't do anything to encourage me to lose weight.  In fact, I think my mother to this day unconsciously sabotages me.

My much older sister was always on me to lose weight.  In fact, when she was planning her wedding, she asked me to be a bridesmaid.  Then she told me she wanted me to lose 80lbs (10lbs a month) for the wedding.  Needless to say, by the day of the wedding, I was 20lbs heavier.

I think kids follow the examples of their parents.  Mine didn't exercise.  I probably would've been responsive if they had done active things with me.  "Let's go for a walk" or "Let's ride bicycles."

My other sister's daughter was overweight, and she encouraged her to get involved in sports.  She has since lost 50lbs and is doing great.

I think the parents have to go about it a certain way.  Ultimately, the teen has to want it.  We've been there, we know...

~ Barbara 

My parents or my mom because she is so healthy at age 64 she can still wear clothes from 15 yrs ago.

She encouraged me but I will admit the more you push on the subject the more she is going to fight it . 

It was like with my smoking.  I knew it was bad for me , but the more people harped on me , my hubby, my father big time the more I smoked and the more I didn't want to quit because somebody told me not to do it.  That is the worst thing for me I hate it when people tell not to do something it makes me want to do it even more . I was a adult so you know that is going to happen with a teen .

And the parents have to do some things to change things also.  Quit buying the soda, quit buying the junk food if the stuff isn't in the house then they dont eat it, or if they do it then at least you are not contributing to the problem.

I have a 16 yr old son and because I went through when I was a kid I was ten times harder on my son.

I really cracked down on the junk food and the snacks.    He does drink the soda, and the chips and the candy but because at a young age those items are not a big deal to him because I put limits on them .  He wasn't allowed to take a bag of chips and just sit down with them , he had to put them on a plate and then eat them.

But for your problem she is 17 now big enough to make up her own mind and just like us once again till she is ready to lose the weight then there is nothing really the parents can do.  Oh they can push  her to death but then she will end up hating them and eating ten times more or at least that is what I would have done as a teenager.

Like I said before the parents can help by not contributing the problem but she has to want it on her own .

Good luck I hope they find success with her .

I was MO teen.  My mom and i talked a couple months back about how she tried to help! I now realized that she did what she thought was her best! She just pretty much verbalized to me about losing but never physically did anything to help.  I now have a 9 year old who is following in my path, in terms of weight. I have my moms actions, or lack there of, to show me what not to do! The best way to jump start the weight loss is support.  What ever their diet should be, the parents' diet should be!  Make it a lifestyle change, otherwise the kid will view the "diet" as having an end, and risk reverting back to bad habits. 

I am 22 years old and was at 285 about a year ago and stayed there for a while. I chose on my own to have surgery. My mother, no support what so ever. I asked her repeatedly to stop buying the junk food and sodas and ask her to go on walks with me. I had to do everything on my own. Buy my own foods, gym memberships and surgery. I am glad to say that I could do it on my own with the help of my amazing boyfriend. I am now down to 247 and only 6 weeks out of surgery. I know how hard it is to be 17 and MO Its like it was yesterday lol. It makes you depressed which doesnt exactly put you in the get out there and go for it attitude. I started by cutting out sodas and eating a little less and just walking for 30 mins a day. its hard to do that with a 17 year old but it would be a great bonding experience to make it a family thing. I wish I had my mom there to push me and help me. But it will only get worse if she doesnt want the help that is being offered. I hope this helps. and if she needs anyone to talk to that is closer to her age I would be HAPPY to talk to her.