Naysayers/Negative People/Call Them What You Want

There's so much talk of people wanting to leave this forum and so much negativity that I just want to say this.....

It's one thing to bring to the table complications/dislikes/issues/etc. with the band and someone just being a ranting lunatic with issues.

I have personally met one of these people who post on this forum.  Trust me when I say, they were like that PRIOR to surgery!(and one week after surgery)  They reason that it's because of their bad lap band experience.  It's doesn't take rocket science to spot those who in general live a life full of criticism and negativity. 

One thing I know for sure....we all face adversities in life.  It's how we deal with those adversities that make our lives what they are.

My plea is for those who are so unhappy, find a solution.  It might not be the solution you want, make peace with it and come here for encouraging support.

One of my favorite quotes is...."it is what it is, it's not what it should have been, not what it could have been, it is what it is."

So move on already!

Thanks for listening.

Sandra

warning...I am jacking (stealing) that saying to use..I love it.

stealing that quote RIGHT NOW!!!  :)

Good post!

 Sometimes (It is what it is) . and sometimes we cant change it.                                                    We just have to make the best of it. 

                                                                          Connie
                                                 


                                                       

                                                                               

Thank you for saying it again for all of us - "We all face adversities in life.  It might not be the solution you want, make peace with it and come here for encouraging support......MOVE ON ALREADY".  I agree 100% with you. 

Love it!!  The quote I use in my work email is-

"Life brings us joys and sorrows alike, it is what a man does with them, not what they do to him, that is the true measure of his mettle." -Theodore Roosevelt

Great insight~! I was one of the newbies that considered leaving the board as a result of the constant word vomit from some of the bitter bandsters that seem to reply to almost every post with their “help for newbies".  

Then, I was like “Why should I have to leave and miss out on the support available here?"  

The reality is that, even with the best planning and execution, bad things sometimes happen to good people. Since levels of resilience vary, people can choose to manage their pain and disappointment by bouncing back, putting together a recovery plan, etc..  

For others, the pain of what they’ve gone through seems to result in negative thinking that can lead to bitterness and the need to act out/lash out based on that internal pain. There are probably people that are negative and bitter just purely for the h3ll of it, but I think that’s rare. I decided that when I encounter that negativity, I would try to remember that the person is probably suffering inside and I can take a moment to send a little positive, mental energy their way.  

Now, sending positive energy does not include responding to them since I believe that responding only rewards the (undesired) behavior so that’s a boundary I set for myself so I don’t get sucked into a pointless conversation.     

Again, a great and timely post!

 You are so right.  Some people are just negative.  My mom was like that, and though I loved her dearly, her attitude about everything drove me crazy.  She would look out the window of her apartment, overlooking a lovely lake, on a beautiful spring day, and say something like, "I'll bet those two guys talking over there are making a drug deal!", or "I hope that old man talking to that young boy isn't a pedophile!"  She lived in a perfectly nice, safe neighborhood, but all she could see was something bad, so she isolated herself from other people.  Sooo sad.  

I, on the other hand, am an eternal optimist, and so many things in my life that could have been a huge challenge seemed to just work out for me.  I honestly think that's *because* I'm looking for the positive.  What you see is what you believe, and what you believe is what you achieve.

Tami

sometimes you just have to call the WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMBULANCE!!!