I think my Hubby wants me to FAIL!

My husband admits he's jealous. He's not fat enough for surgery. Funny thing he's really not fat at all, just a little sloppy. He's 45 not 25, come on age will get the best of us. He does work out and run a lot.
 He just said the other day " I don't ever see you getting below 170."
I'm not sure if he's being mean or using reverse psychology. See he was a fat kid and he blames his rotten behavior on being picked on all of his life.
Just wondering how many others have had saboteurs as spouses? 

My husband was the biggest cheerleader that I had.  He eventually got weird about it though and jealous.  That wasn't until I had gotten almost to goal though.  Before that, the support was very nice!

Hello

I'm not married any more but my ex would try to sabatoge anything I tried to do for myself...including buying my first car, going back to school, jobs, motherhood, and weight loss.  I am actually glad he's not around for me to have to worry about.  I can focus on me.  Good luck with the hubby

My husband sabotages me all the time. He is very supportive as far as complimenting my weight loss, but I think he misses his enabler/ partner in crime. He buys me sweets all the time, so we can share them. Sweets are my down fall, plus I am a diabetic.  I have been a diabetic for 12 years but he still regularly suggests that  we go for ice cream.  I tell him all the time to go elsewhere to eat his junk if he wants junk, but that would not allow him to tell himself he is just being good to me.

"Peter, Peter pumpkin eater had a wife but couldn't keep her. He put her in a pumpkin shell and there he kept her very well." Remember that nursery rhyme? Well there's a deeper and true message in this tale. Many men feel more secure with their wives and themselves when the wife has an issue that causes low self-esteem. The pumpkin shell being a shell of fat. That shell of fat gives some men an ego-boosting level of confidence. Men sometimes fell threatened when their spouses do something to better their appearances. They somehow feel that if she looks better, someone else might start appreciating the view. My husband is not jealous of the weight loss, but he's not trying to change his eating habits to support my effort. Sometimes it gets annoying, but I've come too far to let anyone discourage me. Ignore him and keep focusing on your goal, you'll be just fine.

the desire we have to change ourselves... to become better versions of who we are scares the people we have in our lives. It challenges them when maybe they do not want to be challenged, because they are not ready... we are ready... for change... they are not. So don't be hard on him. Take the jabs with a grain of salt... jab back if you have to... but keep plowing ahead and they will accept the change in you when they are ready... and if they don't... cross that bridge then... with more weight gone, and a healthier perspective. You can reach your goal... well below 170 if that is what you want. Don't let anyone else... regardless of who they are in your life... tell you otherwise!

The way I see it, this is your journey. It would be great if everyone's spouses were totally on board and cheerleaded us all along. Unfortuantely, they are human just like us and I can tell you when my husband lost 20 pounds in 3 months by, I don't know. eating one less brownie sundae per week I told him he sucked, lol. Of course I was jealous, here I am eating a rice cake and he's like oh, i need a new belt this one is too big.  

Sometimes we say things that are hurtful and we mean them and sometimes we are just frustrated with ourselves.

I would just be honest with him and yourself and evaluate his statement. If need be, sit down and talk to him about it.

Sometimes we have to sit back and think what they must be going through also on this . It's not only  us that changes its our marriage, our relationships with our spouse and so much more.

My friend had the gastric and lost 150 pounds in 10 months.  It really put a strain on their marriage .  One for her hormones going all wacky cause she lost so fast, but the changes in her and then  her husband got insecure in the marriage.

My husband is my biggest supporter , but we also have talked about changes also.   He works away from home anywhere from one to two weeks at a time and his biggest fear is that I will lose all my weight and find a husband that will be home with me every night to hug cuddel with and of course sex.  

He think about that , and I have to remind him how that wont happen .  I told him why would I get rid of the one person that loved me at 350 pounds and saw me which I thought was my worst but treated me like the Queen .

Our spouses have just has many insecurietes that we have being overweight .

 This is your journey, your life, and it would be great if hubby was your biggest cheerleader.

Unfortunately, sometimes people can't handle that we are getting happier, healthier, and more independent as we grow in this process....

Lots of prayers for you.....keep your eye on the prize, good health to you!!!!

 Oddly, my husband's one of the rare ones who prefers me fat, so he's been complaining about how much I'm losing. I wouldn't say he's outright sabotaging, though...we're pretty close, so he knows better than to bring my weak foods into the house, even if ultimately he's pouting about the results.

However, the " I don't ever see you getting below 170." comment is pretty awful. Unless he's an insensitive boob? It could have been spitefully meant, but if you think he's just being thoughtless, he could be trying to give you a reality check and help you avoid setting what he thinks are unattainable goals. You know...'honey, I think you've done great, but don't expect your body to get back to your high school weight, yadda yadda...' If he was talking to a guy, they'd shoulder punch and have a beer. I know my husband forgets I'm a woman who needs more sensitive conversation sometimes, so I could picture him saying something this stupid after a day with the guys.

Either way, like the others said, this is your goal and journey. He's just along for the ride. If anything, comments like those can be turned into motivation to prove him wrong 

~Jen