I am really stupid

Sapphire1964
on 2/15/11 2:16 pm
Ok so ive just been a 'bit' stressed lately and I dont feel like I have made good choices so tonite I come home from bible study and think well, I am going to do liquids for a few days to get myself back on track SO...why not eat the rest of the crackers in the open box? They were small but I had more than '1' serving (17 crackers btw is 1 serving) and now I am thoroughly disgusted, my heart is palpitating, and I am sick to my stomach & feel like I need to throw up kinda but not totally and I dont want to because I dont want to do any damage *** and what did the crackers do?) I know I need talk therapy for my food addiction which has been a lifelong struggle for me but finding a good one is hard. I am on my 2nd chance with a 'tool' for weight loss and I do not want to mess with tjis...so why did I? Tomorrow is another day and I will start it bright and confidently on track but for now, tonight, I am thoroughly disgusted with me. Thx for listening...

RNY 04/05/04
BOB 12/30/10 (Band over Bypass)  

    
reneekennedy11
on 2/15/11 2:21 pm - CA
Hang in there...I at too much today also...I have felt like crap all day!
Sapphire1964
on 2/15/11 2:44 pm
Thx...feeling crappy is NO fun so you would think we would learn!

RNY 04/05/04
BOB 12/30/10 (Band over Bypass)  

    
Iam_with_the_Band
on 2/15/11 3:36 pm
First of all, it doesn't help to get disgusted with ourselves.  We need to use our 'mistake in judgment" to get motivated to change.

We are all food addicts, but we all have the ability to change.  I am the first to say, I am not perfect.  I still have moments that I make very poor choices.  Then I leave that moment and beat myself up for it for a long time.  It's not helpful.

I would suggest that you write down why you got WLS in the first place - what your life was like before getting it and how your current weight loss has changed your life for the better.

I don't believe in starting over with a liquid diet is a good idea.  I do, however, believe that starting with an extremely low carb diet is.  This is something that shows progress on the scale AND it also is a sound Lap Band way of eating.  Eating solid protein only will keep you satiated and in a few days it will also keep your cravings away.  Please consider this.  Liquid only will make you more hungry and cause you to be tempted.  Don't punish yourself that way.

12/09 and 6/11, 9 skin removal procedures with Dr. Sauceda in Monterrey Mexico
Revised to the Sleeve after losing 271 lbs with the LapBand. 

rainbow_runner
on 2/16/11 7:58 am


283 LBS LOST?????? 

Wow.

But of course, the band doesn't work for people with BMIs over 50.  HAH!



    
Iam_with_the_Band
on 2/16/11 12:46 pm
Thanks!
I am 3 years out and just trying to get those last pounds off!

I was told by my insurance company that they would pay up to $80K for gastric bypass, but at my BMI, they would NOT pay one penny for the LapBand!  They are now reaping the benefits of my weight loss!  NO more Lipitor, No more Metformin for PCOS, No more BP med!  AND I am not longer living on Naproxin for chronic pain!  They wrote my PCP and told him I was being non-compliant and not filling my RX.  He informed them - that no thanks to them, I no longer needed those RX!

Life is good.

12/09 and 6/11, 9 skin removal procedures with Dr. Sauceda in Monterrey Mexico
Revised to the Sleeve after losing 271 lbs with the LapBand. 

rainbow_runner
on 2/17/11 6:00 am

I can totally relate!  Our provincial insurance won't pay for lapband either, so I am self-pay to the tune of $20,000.  In the meantime I am no longer pre-diabetic, my cholesterol has gone from through-the-roof to perfectly normal, and the arthritis in my knee is gone.  So I figure I've saved national healthcare a whack of future dough by not having to take medication for any of these things and not taking up a hospital bed eventually.  Nope, not fair at all.

I am so impressed that you opted for the band and not bypass.  Your PCP sounds like a gem.  Best of luck with those last pounds.  I'm in the same boat - about 40 to go and they are taking their sweet time disappearing, LOL!  Ah well, I am pretty darned happy with how things have gone so far, and most importantly my new lifestyle and eating habits are completely and easily sustainable.  And it's all thanks to my little silicon sentry.  Yep, I LOVE MY BAND!!!!!


    
jeralbrowning
on 2/16/11 11:43 am
I know how you are feeling... I have been eating so much more the past week and a half... I haven't had my first fill yet... But I had some bread this past weekend and had a cheese enchilada also and beans, I felt so bad and wonder if this is going back to old ways... I want so much to be healthy and try to stick to my protein diet of meat and cheese, ya I do eat veggies.. I do have crackers on occasion I really like the kelloggs all bran, they are high  in fiber and I can have 18, that is the true carb I eat. normally. I want so bad to break the 200 mark but food is all around and with room mates it does make it hard to not cheat... I do try to keep a food journal with the weigh****cher points on it, but sometimes I am not honest about that too... I pray and hope to be strong and to give the lap band a chance... I try not to beat myself to much and as some have said, tomorrow is another day...
I know where your coming from, food has been my life and friend for so long that it is hard to cut it off... But a New Year and a New us thats all we can do is keep trying...
Kate -True Brit
on 2/15/11 3:38 pm - UK

Stay calm! Show me one bandster who has not done this!! May not do it straightaway but I bet we all do it over time.

IMO doing liquids when we don't have to is not a good idea - although it may help some! If we stop  eating all we want is food! Get truly hungry and "eat" unsatisfying things and food will become the centre of the day!

More practical just to get right back to band eating - dense protein to fill, veggies to "top up",  carbs if any room left.

Next time you ge tthe urge to eat crackers, eat a piece of meat instead.

Kate

Highest 290, Banded - 248   Lowest 139 (too thin!). Comfort zone 155-165.

Happily banded since May 2006.  Regain of 28lbs 2013-14.  ALL GONE!

But some has returned! Up to 175, argh! Off we go again,

   

OCCali_Girl
on 2/15/11 3:39 pm - CA
Hey Sapphire-
Try not to be so hard on yourself, it is just one day at a time.  I hate to hear you be so mean to yourself.  None of us got fat because we knew how to make good food choices and we could always walk away from the food when we were stressed!  and you RECOGNIZED the mistake, WOW!!  that is huge!

Think of all the good things you have done.... lost A LOT of weight so far! and I don't know about you but if I were in a food binge (pre-band) I would eat a hell of a lot more then 17 crackers! So you still limited yourself,   and you have already made a good decision  to go back to liquids for a few days.   This is a journey and what I think about in relation to my band is I am NEVER going to diet again, I am going to live and make good food decisions whenever possible but I will never use the word "cheat" again as this is my life now!  Be kind to yourself, and until you find that therapist keep writing here and just for yourself!  it is a good way to start

Be kind to yourself!
~Anna

The band may not be perfect, but it will be perfect for me!

   
VEGAS IN JUNE GOAL!!        

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