Need Help and encouragement....

Hi...most of you probably dont even know me as it has been so long since I have been on here but I dont know where else to go...
I had my surgery in Aug 08...I did so well...and lost 90 pounds...I kept it off for a pretty long time...Worked out ate right....all the right things...
Than my world blew up...
My husband of almost 20 years had a massive heart attack on his 43rd birthday last Feb and passed away...I have been lost since than...I had kept the weight off and didnt go back to my bad habits until Sept...and than I started to creep up....I have now officially gained 23 pounds which puts me right over that 200 mark...I never ever wanted to see that number again..but I have....I am sick over it...I know my eating is emotional....but I cant stop it and I dont know what to do..I amin therapy and that is why I think I havent gained back all of the weight....I just dont want to ever go back to that  pained exsistance of being overweight...and now that I will be overweight and a widow...I just want to eat more ben and jerrys.....It does go down so much better than anything else....but my comfort food is no longer comforting to my emotional well being...HELP!

I am so sorry for your loss. 
I don't think it's a matter of what to do to lose the weight you lost because it sounds like you know what to do to lose the weight.  I think you need to work on your grief.  Go see a therapist or joining one of those groups for people that lost husbands/wives.  I am thinking if you have another outlet for your feelings maybe it will be easier for you to get back on track. 

Again I am so sorry you are in pain and I hope you will find peace.

So sorry for your loss! This must be a difficult month for you!

I really don't know what to say, you are going through counceling and I think that is what's needed now. Just don't isolate your self. Reach out to your friends and family and you might also try a WLS support group.

Hugs!

My heart goes out to you.  How awful to lose your husband.  I don't know if it would help to think of what your husband would have wanted you to do.  I'm sure he would want you to be healthy and happy.  Maybe you could use that to motivate yourself to try and get healthier, physically and mentally.  Please let us know how things are going.  We try to help and care!

Hugs,
Kristi

 First off ((hugs)) that is a very hard thing to go thru.  I give you credit for only gaining 23 lbs.  

I think posting here that you want to get back on track is the first step.  You're a successful bandster you know what you need to do, but maybe you need a little extra help emotionally to get there.  I second the idea of a support group or counseling.  You need to work thru all of those feelings and even tho Ben and Jerry's feel good at the time, it's not a good coping mechanism in the long run.  Post on the board regularly and work on just getting thru 1 day at a time.  That will also help

Sorry for your loss and welcome back..

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. But i think you deserve enormous praise for only gaining 23lbs.

I haven't any specific advice to offer but I do suggest that you come back to the OH family! 

I have found help here all the way through.  Sometimes just reading about the things others do; sometimes by trying to help others it helps me to see what I should be doing myself; other times, just for that fellow-feeling.

So welcome back! Stay with us!

Kate

Thank you....I appreciate your responses....Maybe I just needed a bit of a pity party...and to see I can still do this it isnt the end of the world....I will be on here a bit

Patty I am so very sorry for your lose. I'm sure you are only emotinal eating right now and a 23lb gain is incredalby small under the circmanstances. Pleas stay with us and maybe by being supportaive we can help you a little.
Karen

hi Patty... I know today will be a hard day for you. My heart goes out to you. I am sending love your way.
If you need a pitty party that is ok... and I will gladly be a party goer... as long as you promise to STEP AWAY FROM THE Ben AND JERRY'S... EVEN ben and jerry would step in and hold you back.
don't lose your way completely...slipping back a little is ok because you can see the light... but know that all those who love you stand in that gap between light and darkness and are collectivly pulling you towards the light. Go stand in the sunshine and remember the pride your husband had when you lost your weight... he would want you to take care of yourself...he would want you to be well...

Against despair be well...

Patty I am so sorry for your loss. I love the B&J too... but it is a temporary soother... and only makes you feel worse in the long run. Stay strong. You have done soo well already... a 23lb gain is incredibly small under the cir****tances. Kudos to you for coming back here and recognizing the need before it became 30.. or 40...

((GIANT HUGS))