MY CONFESSION: I'm struggling

Bette,  I am very sorry that you are struggling!  BUT, I would like to say THANK YOU so much for sharing your struggles!!  It is very helpful to know that someone that has had such GREAT success with the band still has to work and does have some failure just like me!  

I do not often comment on posts, but yours have been a great source of information and giggles (OK, most of the time full out LAUGHS) that I have come to look for on the board. 

It is great to know that we are all in this together and while we may have different personal issues, weight problems and struggles are something we all share.  Just know that we are all in this together and any support that we can give each other is always appreciated. 

Wishing better times to come your way...BUT don't give up the fight!! 

Thank you for being honest. You embody being human and putting a face we have grown to love on our struggle with wieght loss. No matter how we got here. For some the stuggle is to gain and not develop un-healthy attitudes about eating which cause some to die from anorexia or bulemia. No one get a free ride. Something gives, vitamin loss, scars from surgery, relationship changes, pressure to stay  thin, worrying about a 20 pound gain when you have lost 200.  Really? I know people have died from this board, suffered immeasurably both emotionally and physically. So you eat for comfort, you have faced it and you are lucky enough to live.  To those that have lived live wanting to be thin, it aint all its cracked up to be. Everyone seek out your happiness in life. If your happiness is dependent upon 20 pounds, there are bigger issues to conquer in your life.
Bette, you are no loser, you are a friggin inspiration.

I couldn't agree more that life goes on band or no band, RNY or no RNY, etc....we've all had a rough go the last couple of years with the economy in the toilet and all the crap going on in the world + our own personal issues.  In our immediate family we have lost 4/6 jobs that we held down 4 years ago, one to my disability (I made more than my husband) and three due to job loss due to the economic downturn...out of the 6 of us (me, DH, DD, DS, SIL and DIL) only my SIL and DIL are employed.  Cobra is running out for my husband and it costs a fortune to replace his medical/dental insurance.  We are helping our son out while he gets back on his feet after losing his job in October...two mortgages, one kid in college and 3 car payments...lost his job in a hostile takeover, he was a principle in the company, but not the one making the big decisions when the takeover happened.  **** happens and all you can do is wade through it. 
You are such an inspiration to so many of us...don't get down on yourself!  We are all human and we hit bumps in the road, hell, sometimes we run off the road for a while, till we remember where the heck that road is!
Hang in there...we're all with you in spirit...
xo Stephanie

Thanks Bette for posting this.  I don't post much but wanted to tell you that I appreciate all you have done for us at ObesityHelp.
Hang in there!!!!

Bette...

I'm not going to do the 'get to basics' routine, that almost doesn't apply here. It's different.

First of all, IMHO maintenance is harder than losing. You know, surgery is the easy part. You just lay there and sleep while everyone else does the work. ;o) Losing isn't really all that hard after you do much of the head work. Maintenance, that's when it gets to be a buggar.

You sound EXACTLY like me when I'm stressing. I'm fine with food until the stress kicks in big time then I start obsessing about food. I can't cram enough in there. I can't stop thinking about it and dwelling over it.

Effexor.

It's been a life saver for me during these times. I do not take it all the time, maybe 2-3 weeks here and there. Theoretically it shouldn't work that way, it's an all or none kinda drug. But in my case I start taking it and within 5 days my head hunger calms way down.

You have insurance now, right? Maybe go get an Rx for it. Then when you can't afford it due to no insurance you CAN get it free from Pfizer. You send a completed form to Pfizer and an Rx from your doc, they will mail it to you monthly for a year.

Ask anyone who has taken brand name and generic Effexor, they will tell you in this case, generic does not work. I usually prefer generics for a variety of reasons that don't matter in this case but with Effexor, should you decide to talk to your doctor about this generics really don't work.

Hang in there!!!!

The year of 2010 was the year of the excuse for me, even though it wasn't a horrible year it was like a culmination of my feelings for years past: deaths of loved ones and pets, multiple medical issues, some rough spots early on in my marriage, loss of loved ones' jobs, apartment fire, etc. I realized only 2 weeks ago upon returning here that excuses are excuses no matter how real they are. I came home with a migraine last week, the usual me would have said "I can't work-out (in home equipment), my head hurts and I just worked  hours and I didn't eat well and I DON"T WANT TO. I deserve to sit down, I work hard!" And on and on, but then I had this epiphany of "Well you can only work out for you, if you skip today you'll skip tomorrow, take a pain pill and use the 15 minutes between pain gone and crazy Vicodin you to exercise the best you can." And then I did and I was way past proud of me.
 
I can either eat away my unhappiness, which of course will later make me unhappy or I can breathe, relax, take a bath, brush my teeth, take a walk, do anything AWAY from the fridge and make it past one more snack attack. Sometimes I just say it out loud, I don't care if I get a response "I want to eat everything in the fridge." If I go to do that my husband will know that is where I am so I know I won't do it. I don't want anyone to see me with my head practically in the fridge, how embarrassing...

I work as a counselor in a drug and alcohol clinic and I also realized semi-recently that we are no different from drug addicts, chemicals or no. We have withdrawal ..hello, *****y? We have rituals. We have friends who are users who lead us to use. We have places that lead us to use. We use to self-medicate. We use for any reason (good day, bad day, etc).

Some therapists have sliding scales so that may be an option. I'm not a big proponent of medications, especially when there is no organic reason for the feelings but sometimes medication is needed to help a therapy loosen up if you will for counseling but Bette, I can't really see you needing help talking, lol.

You will always be an inspiration to us all even well you feel less than magnificent because you can always admit the truth which many who are successful in their journey can not. It sometimes seems like when someone meets goal it is all sunshine and kitties, so thank you for keeping it honest and real.