Need more support groups!

OK GOSH, why is it I seem to only be on here asking for support!!!! lol I have been struggling lately b/c I feel I am at a stand still, I know this is normal , I know I could do this and do that to change it ,, but thats not what I need,, I need support,, like somewhere/someone I can go and talk about the reason I am feeling like this,, I know I am not eating the way I should,, I WOULD NOT HAVE GOTTEN A $34,000 LIFE THREATENING SURGERY IF I COULD ,, so please don't bash me,, It seems alot of people on here struggling with the emontional part of this,, I mean now that I am able to eat foods I just can't seem to stop,, I am slowly becomming a bulemic and somehow thats OK with me,, This can't be right , and I didn't get this surgery to become bulemic and that be ok ,and how I loose weight,, I seem to eat what I want and then barf everything up> It seems my body is used to doing it now, and I HATE IT,,, I want to change soo bad ,, I want to learn to not eat soo much ,, to not want soo much,, to not choice bad foods,,, BUT I CAN'T,, I AM ADDICTED,, I have a problem,, again I knew this before surgery,, ISN'T THIS WHY PEOPLE GET SURGERY? however I have never heard anyone bring it up,, not the barfing thing , just the struggling in general,, I mean this has to be common,, I just wish some people would suck up their pride and admit it,, I AM ,, However I have ALWAYS been told I hold NOTHING back,, so I guess thats why I am,,, I am thinking of going to OA meetings but they have them at the weirdest times,, BUT I WILL GO ,I HAVE TO,,, I was wondering if anyone knows of any other meetings ? if they go to any? If they have a therapist who specializes in food issues? I have ****ty insurance so my choices of therapist are SOOO limited and most of them are interns ,, who I know more than them,, I just feel I need more support,, Just wondering if anyone has any advice,, PLEASE PLEASE don't bash me ,, I know what I am doing now is wrong , I know I need to change,, But if I could I WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN THIS SURGERY ,, so please keep that in mind! thanks yall,,, Some of you have become great friends and give the best advice so I am eager to hear what you have to say. I feel like such a idiot even posting this,, but hey isn't recongnizing the behavior the first step!!!

I'm not bashing you at all...but you are not the first to say this. It has been said time and time again that this is a mental struggle and people are struggling. Have you read some of the other forums on OH? There are lots of people on those forums struggling. I suggest the following: 1. You call JoAnna and tell her what is going on. 2. You call the dr who did your psych eval and see if they can help you. You keep posting here. good luck Diane

I don't know of any groups Ash. And most people don't eat and throw up like that. And it's really not nice to tell people to suck up their pride and admit it. Because it is not happening to the majority of us. This is a tool and you have to learn how to work it. Talk to your doctor about your problem maybe he can get you some help. See if he has a psychiatrist you can see. It sounds like a mental thing and that is best left to a professional. I've only thrown up maybe four times in six months and if was from something getting stuck because I didn't chew it up properly and maybe this is happening to you as well. No one is telling you you have to be perfect and stop eating, but you have to decide that you are gonna stop. And if you can't do it on your own then you need to seek professional help. We are not professional here, we are just people like you that had a problem with weight and want to support each other as best we can. I will gladly tell you anything I have experienced I don't hide anything. I'm not bashing you at all just letting you know that talking to people like that won't get you an answer. It will only make people mad and feel like your accusing them of lying. Everyones experience is different. I hope you can get the help you need and soon, because what you are doing is harmful and it will make you sick. I care alot about you, you are like everyones little sister here and we need to watch out for you. So please talk to your doctor about this. Tina

OK maybe you read the post wrong , or somehow it came out wrong,, but I did go back and read it and I made sure I said ,,NOT THE BARFING ISSUE,, the emotional eating issues,, Thats what the main focus was,, I see alot of people telling all their progress and how good they are doing and not many ,maybe a few, saying they are struggling and asking for advice,, I wasn't trying to hurt anyone's feelings or make anyone mad,, Great thats all I need now is to make the only people I feel like I can do to for support mad at me! Soooooooooooo sorry if anyone was offended by my post , It wasn't really hitting the barfing thing, I meant the struggle with food and portions mainly, thought I made that clear but I guess not, sorry ,

You didn't make anyone mad and we weren't trying to come down on you. Just saying that not everyone is struggling with the emotional part of it. Some do and some don't. I don't struggle with it. I've never been the type of person to allow emotions to take me over. And some people who are struggling with it may not be able to talk openly about it. Try asking people to email you directly. It may not be a pride thing it may be that they can't talk openly about their feelings. I know lots of people who can't. Anyone here that can help you will I'm sure. But like I said we are not professionals and can only give you advice. And then it may not even be good advice who knows. It's good that you recognize you have a problem and need a solution. But that is something for the doctors to help you with. Have you looked for a forum that is for this type of thing. I will check and see. And you can always come to us for support we are always here just remember we may not always be able to help. But I promise I will try my best. And no need for apologizes you didn't make anyone mad. Take care, Tina

Here is a link to the addiction forum maybe someone on there can help you better. Maybe you can find someone who is feeling the same way you are. Hope it helps. Tina http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/addictions/

hi ashleigh, im sorry your having so a rough time, and i know you had a rough time in the hospital,etc. Im like tina, you need to get professional help. I don't know exactly where you can get it.. i am not afraid to admit anything. There are times i eat stuff i don't need, or eat when i am not hungry. I have been on here before with that issue. But eventually i get back on track. I will never bash you, but you need to stay focused on your issue and not assume everyone has the same issue as you. Good luck girl.. i hope u don't take this the wrong way... rhonda

Ashleigh, we need to talk. I'm not going to write a long response, but I will stalk you like a rock-star groupie until I find you. I know a lot of folks where you are. Surprisingly, or not, many lap bandsters have food addictions and go that route to avoid the "food police" RNY side-effects. They run from it, but still have to come back to it. Whatever got us overweight will have to be addressed if we -- all postops -- intend to lose weight and *keep* it off. Maybe you can come hang out with the bandsters. This surgery wasn't your choice, but postop, we are talking about eating compulsions, stalls, throwing up, eating too little/then too much and I have a very good friend who did decide that weight loss surgery needed to be paired with OA. Ya wanna go to OA, or any other support forum here on OH? I'll be there with you. We signed up to make this journey "together." Frances

FRANCIS,,GIRL you are going to get those golden wings any day now I KNOW! Thanks for calling me , you always make me feel better!

Ash, First of all, we are here to support you. You will get no bashing from me. What you are telling us is how you feel and there is nothing wrong with that AT ALL. People have this surgery for various different reasons and I have heard that some do develop a different eating disorder after surgery. This surgery is HARD emotionally. It takes a toll on you and your life. Everything as you once knew is no longer. Not only does the eating change but, everything around you changes. I have had my days where I have wanted to make myself barf too for fear of gaining weight back. Luckily is has only happened 2-3 times. However, when I over eat and am miserable and know I will be, I will make myself barf sometimes. I clearly don't look at it as a problem when I do that. I look at it as relief because I know I ate too much. I would encourage you to attend a support group or find a good counselor that can help you deal with this. Then there are self image issues too. Counseling is not a bad thing and I am glad you are able to share your feeling with us and reach out too us. Just know that it does get better and be strong. I know (from when I met you) you are a strong willed person. Try to stay focused and positive and if you need us, know that we are here for you. Gina