Reflections on a bad day

I've waited until this day was nearly over to post my reflections on a truly awful time to be me. My baby's puppy died. Buster was very symbolic in my weight loss journey because he showed up in October and we estimate he was born about the time I was banded. As I lost weight, Buster found it. At 6-7 months, he was 70 pounds and now he was nearly 80 pouds up as I was nearly 80 pounds down. Being sick and alone with my toddler, I've not been able to take really good care of him lately. Ironically, he died while my "baby's daddy" was home. The doggie seemed to have gotten caught up in some brush and strangled on the line. I sent my baby to daycare and then started making calls for help with his bloating and heavy body. I considered yanking my JP drain tube out to take care of him, but I can't lift the weight I've lost. After public works left with Buster, the last 10 months of pain, changes, surgeries (6) and struggles seem to hit home. I have all the best excuses in the world, but I've let my little girl and her big doggie down and at times it was too hard to bear. Life is strange, I've lost four of my own children in my six year marriage, but I'm sure I cried more today than at any other time. It's not that I didn't mourn my precious children. It's it all tumbling down as I called office after office because "I can't move my baby's puppy." What next? Food was available during this horrible day. My husband had breakfast at McDonalds whe I dropped him to work and Greek for a late lunch, but I wasn't tempted. I probably didn't eat enough today, but I have no appetite when in pain. Once I got some meds in me, I was able to enjoy a nice eggplant snack with my family tonight. I harbor no ill will toward the band, but this sickly, thinner Frances is not the woman I feel comfortable with. I like going, going and creativing and conquering. I know that HE will be strong in my weakness, but being "needy" continues to be one of the greatest challenges of my life. I'm sorry that this doesn't seem to be about food and the band, but it is about me. My food adventure this week, is, however, trying to find ways to substitute eggplant for starches like pasta, potatoes and rice. Any eggplant recipes will be appreciated. As always, please continue to pray for Cece, Scott and I. Our life is like the eggplant dishes -- constantly changing. Onward! Frances

Frances, My heart goes out to you. It sounds like you have been through so much and you always have a positive attitude. Just know my thoughts and prayers are indeed with you. JC

Fran You know I've always got your back. Sorry to hear about your puppy. Don't worry things will get better. Stick in there and be strong. Fred

FRANCES, SO SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOUR JOURNEY HAS BEEN SO TOUGH AND TRYING HUN, BUT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT ATTITUDE TOWARDS IT HUN. YOU KNOW GOD'S STRENGTH AND THE POWER OF PRAYER, AND YOU KNOW THAT HE IS THERE EVEN IN THE TOUGH TIMES FOR YOU. PLEASE KNOW THAT I AND WE (OH) ARE HERE FOR YOU WHENEVER YOU NEED US SWEETIE, SENDING AN EXTRA PRAYER UP FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY TONIGHT!!! HERE IS A RECIPE THAT I DEARLY LOVE!!!! BABA GHANOUSH (EGGPLANT) 1 1/2 lb. eggplant 3 tbsp. lemon juice 1 tsp. salt 2 tsp. minced garlic 3 tbsp. sesame paste 1/4 c. chopped parsley 1/2 c. toasted pine nuts Preheat oven to 400 degrees. ***** eggplant all over with a fork and bake until tender (30 to 40 minutes). When cooled, cut in half and scoop out flesh (should have 2 to 2 1/4 cups). Beat in food processor or with mixer with lemon juice until smooth. Mash the salt and garlic together, mix with sesame paste and combine with eggplant mixture. Stir in parsley and sprinkle with pine nuts. Serve with cut-up pita bread. GOD BLESS, LORI