Newbies and Oldbies
Well then, I will put my two cents in as well. Many of Dr. S's patients were distraught by his leaving the area and many more were simply scared. We felt a great support system has left us. He was not just a surgeon but stayed very close and involved in our weight loss journey. It was scary for so many of his patients, so much, they became very anxious and emotional. Rather than getting support which should have happened. They were bashed and criticized. Brenda came on here to try and calm things down and give them some hope that they had a connection to him. I have seen this happen to another local surgeon and the emotions were just as high. She helped many through that as well. I personally am thankful she was there for my family and me when I had my surgery. And has always been there when I had a question or felt a bit over whelmed. An example of this is when I struggled, posted something negative on here, instead of the criticizm we are use to on this board. She emailed me direct, then met me in person to sit and talk about things. I was frustrated and very lost., she listened to me,...took notice of what I was upset about...talked me into emailing the doctor direct and I had an appt with him within two days to discuss my problem...THAT IS SUPPORT!!!
I am speaking for several of his patients because we just had dinner together tonight and this very subject came up. They do not feel as though they want to come back because of certain people who try to over power their conversations when they aren't part of the problem and certainly not part of the solution.-(where was the "don't read, if you don't like what is posted?"-they felt extremely lost and alone. No one came to rescue them...instead; they were condemned by outsiders who had no idea of what was actually going on... (Such as ...an ex-employee who would post negative things about the doctor)..
Leeann you are the prime example when you broke into several of those conversations with very strong opinions and you had nothing at all to do with what was going on and had no knowledge of any of it. And then to sit here and say how supportive you are...good grief!
I am the only one that would post this; others are just saying it in messages to each other as I have two here stating that exact same thing about you...
If you would just relax and understand that others were having an issue that would soon pass if they just had some support on here...many are extremely hurt and I don't blame them.
The result is that we have lost people who had been posters here for awhile...we lost a great support system and leader with knowledge training and connections, not because she was intimidated but simply because she hasn't time for the “Bull"....
I think it's sad to see people posting on here about how supportive they are, and how it's ok to state an opinion...But God forgive us if we do.
And I am sure I will be slammed for this one woman’s opinion. But what the heck!
I am speaking for several of his patients because we just had dinner together tonight and this very subject came up. They do not feel as though they want to come back because of certain people who try to over power their conversations when they aren't part of the problem and certainly not part of the solution.-(where was the "don't read, if you don't like what is posted?"-they felt extremely lost and alone. No one came to rescue them...instead; they were condemned by outsiders who had no idea of what was actually going on... (Such as ...an ex-employee who would post negative things about the doctor)..
Leeann you are the prime example when you broke into several of those conversations with very strong opinions and you had nothing at all to do with what was going on and had no knowledge of any of it. And then to sit here and say how supportive you are...good grief!
I am the only one that would post this; others are just saying it in messages to each other as I have two here stating that exact same thing about you...
If you would just relax and understand that others were having an issue that would soon pass if they just had some support on here...many are extremely hurt and I don't blame them.
The result is that we have lost people who had been posters here for awhile...we lost a great support system and leader with knowledge training and connections, not because she was intimidated but simply because she hasn't time for the “Bull"....
I think it's sad to see people posting on here about how supportive they are, and how it's ok to state an opinion...But God forgive us if we do.
And I am sure I will be slammed for this one woman’s opinion. But what the heck!
Love Kitten,
Go back and re-read those posts from that week and tell me again that there was NO empathy or support for Dr. S's patients. Granted, there was a huge personality conflict that week having to do with Dr. Curry and what was perceived as a rude comment. Many of us who like and respect Dr. Curry stated our opinion in his defense and that's where the whole mess started.
Several people that week offered alternative suggestions for aftercare in an effort to be empathetic and helpful. More than once these suggestions were met with rude defensiveness for Dr. S. I understand being distraught and scared but don't cry foul when people quit trying to be helpful.
Lee Ann and Brenda's issues with each other were THEIR issues. I would have to go back and read more but I do not ever remember Lee Ann being anything but nice with the exception of her exchange with Brenda.
I too can go back and point fingers at people who have been rude to me asking how in the world I ever lose weight eating like I do! Talk about a hurtful comment to someone who was new! Actually I think I might dig deep into my old posts and find out who it was just for giggles since I get the last laugh now being at 80% loss of my excess weight!
We can all continue to do this inane "us and them" debate which is simply wasted energy. I, for one am going to try to let it go. Those of us that post on here almost daily are not a clique, gang or posse. We exclude no one. I believe I have been respectful in airing my opinions on this but doubt I can continue to be. So, if there is anyone out there that believes we are a negative exclusionary group that's perfectly fine....hopefully they will continue to think so and steer clear of us mean and nasty people because it likely would just cause more unrest.
And that is MY opinion.
Go back and re-read those posts from that week and tell me again that there was NO empathy or support for Dr. S's patients. Granted, there was a huge personality conflict that week having to do with Dr. Curry and what was perceived as a rude comment. Many of us who like and respect Dr. Curry stated our opinion in his defense and that's where the whole mess started.
Several people that week offered alternative suggestions for aftercare in an effort to be empathetic and helpful. More than once these suggestions were met with rude defensiveness for Dr. S. I understand being distraught and scared but don't cry foul when people quit trying to be helpful.
Lee Ann and Brenda's issues with each other were THEIR issues. I would have to go back and read more but I do not ever remember Lee Ann being anything but nice with the exception of her exchange with Brenda.
I too can go back and point fingers at people who have been rude to me asking how in the world I ever lose weight eating like I do! Talk about a hurtful comment to someone who was new! Actually I think I might dig deep into my old posts and find out who it was just for giggles since I get the last laugh now being at 80% loss of my excess weight!
We can all continue to do this inane "us and them" debate which is simply wasted energy. I, for one am going to try to let it go. Those of us that post on here almost daily are not a clique, gang or posse. We exclude no one. I believe I have been respectful in airing my opinions on this but doubt I can continue to be. So, if there is anyone out there that believes we are a negative exclusionary group that's perfectly fine....hopefully they will continue to think so and steer clear of us mean and nasty people because it likely would just cause more unrest.
And that is MY opinion.
~BECKA~ Start - 254 / Current - 172.6 / Goal - 160
Just another Bariatric Babe!!
Just another Bariatric Babe!! Dang all you women are alike......I am gone for months ..come back and I swear it's as if I never left. Same cnversations..different players. lol
I think the thing to do instead of arguing about what happened in the past is to shake hands and start all over. If my Xwife would have done that I would have a house right now...lol
I have lost 152 lbs since I got in this board. I am running and playin all over the place. riding my harley today like i always wanted.
had a good time at dinner ladies...lets do it agaon soon..and I agree about Brenda she is awesome...missed her at dinner tonight..guess teh grandkiddies are holding her down....and I don't know what happened before ..to lazy and don't care enough to read back...that's the other problem with women they never forget a thing..(just like the X..lol..)but remember someetimes typing things don't come out the same as in real words ladies..if you all mean what you say about gettinga long ..reach out a hand to the person you think you are fighting with....i will bet you will find a good heart at the other side of that handshake......have a great weekend..i am traveling driving a truck don't come around much..wanted to say hi to everybody.
bye
I think the thing to do instead of arguing about what happened in the past is to shake hands and start all over. If my Xwife would have done that I would have a house right now...lol
I have lost 152 lbs since I got in this board. I am running and playin all over the place. riding my harley today like i always wanted.
had a good time at dinner ladies...lets do it agaon soon..and I agree about Brenda she is awesome...missed her at dinner tonight..guess teh grandkiddies are holding her down....and I don't know what happened before ..to lazy and don't care enough to read back...that's the other problem with women they never forget a thing..(just like the X..lol..)but remember someetimes typing things don't come out the same as in real words ladies..if you all mean what you say about gettinga long ..reach out a hand to the person you think you are fighting with....i will bet you will find a good heart at the other side of that handshake......have a great weekend..i am traveling driving a truck don't come around much..wanted to say hi to everybody.
bye
One person's version of support is is not going to mirror the next person's version.
For me, without a strong support network I would not have been as successful in my weight loss as I have been to date. A monthly support group is great but it's not enough. The accountability, what's your plan and exercise challenge posts are supportive to many of us. If it's not someone else's cup of tea that's fine. I personally don't think anyone should begrudge the other person for seeking and receiving whatever they need in their own journey.
For anyone who doesn't want to read a certain post they simply don't have to open it up. I'll confess that I don't read everything on here every day.
Yes, this is a question and answer site but like any other internet forum it becomes a community where people with common shared issues (obesity) go on to share many things in their life since obesity affects every aspect of life. It's the ripple effect.
I can, however, understand how a newer person would come on here and be slightly intimidated seeing the strong friendships that are on this board and wondering how they might fit in. It's kinda like being the new kid in school all over again. If that new person never makes an effort though they will always feel like the outsider. That goes for life as a whole not just on this board. The friendships people see on here didn't happen overnight....we were all the new kid at some point too. I remember how Missy and Dawn took me under their wing when I first signed on. It took me a while to feel comfortable here but now it's one of the first places I check when I sign onto my computer....then I go to Facebook!
Let's all just sing Kumbaya and get back to regularly scheduled programming, eh?
For me, without a strong support network I would not have been as successful in my weight loss as I have been to date. A monthly support group is great but it's not enough. The accountability, what's your plan and exercise challenge posts are supportive to many of us. If it's not someone else's cup of tea that's fine. I personally don't think anyone should begrudge the other person for seeking and receiving whatever they need in their own journey.
For anyone who doesn't want to read a certain post they simply don't have to open it up. I'll confess that I don't read everything on here every day.
Yes, this is a question and answer site but like any other internet forum it becomes a community where people with common shared issues (obesity) go on to share many things in their life since obesity affects every aspect of life. It's the ripple effect.
I can, however, understand how a newer person would come on here and be slightly intimidated seeing the strong friendships that are on this board and wondering how they might fit in. It's kinda like being the new kid in school all over again. If that new person never makes an effort though they will always feel like the outsider. That goes for life as a whole not just on this board. The friendships people see on here didn't happen overnight....we were all the new kid at some point too. I remember how Missy and Dawn took me under their wing when I first signed on. It took me a while to feel comfortable here but now it's one of the first places I check when I sign onto my computer....then I go to Facebook!
Let's all just sing Kumbaya and get back to regularly scheduled programming, eh?
~BECKA~ Start - 254 / Current - 172.6 / Goal - 160
Just another Bariatric Babe!!
Just another Bariatric Babe!! 
There is always the option of just not clicking those threads. Accountability is a support system for many (myslef included) and also a way of getting new food ideas. This is a voluntary community board and if you and others a re annoyed by some posts...well don't read them. No disrespect meant but I think it is a pretty easy solution.
Sonja
Sonja
That was the point I was trynig to make, Sonja. And the reason I jumped in this post. Simply to show that it does hurt and bother others when someone else jumps in on someone elses feelings, ideas, or vents. Now suddenly those who jumped in on what was going on back then are the ones saying "don't click on the post" "don't read".."you don't have to reply" "we are here to support and care"yadda yadda yadda. easier said than done..ehy?
As you know Dr. Sonnanstine is an excellent surgeon and very good doctor. I do know he reads the board from time to time and did so when that was going on. I know if that was about me it would have bothered me. Knowing the type of kind and giving person he has been to all of us, this must have been very disturbing to him. Things were blown completely out of whack.
As you know Dr. Sonnanstine is an excellent surgeon and very good doctor. I do know he reads the board from time to time and did so when that was going on. I know if that was about me it would have bothered me. Knowing the type of kind and giving person he has been to all of us, this must have been very disturbing to him. Things were blown completely out of whack.
Sonja,
This is my last reply I swear. I totally support you and the other members who do accountability. I was just quoting a friend of mine named Steph. Who thought it(accountability) was rediculous. When I read what you guys eat everyday it reminds me not to cheat and gives me new food ideas.
I do read just about every post just because everyone's bariatric experience is so different yet so the same.
I feel terrible about the post that I made and do not think I was thinking clearly or conveying into words what I wanted to say.
If it weren't for this board my husband and I probably never would have gone through with the surgery
For eveyone else again I apologize
This is my last reply I swear. I totally support you and the other members who do accountability. I was just quoting a friend of mine named Steph. Who thought it(accountability) was rediculous. When I read what you guys eat everyday it reminds me not to cheat and gives me new food ideas.
I do read just about every post just because everyone's bariatric experience is so different yet so the same.
I feel terrible about the post that I made and do not think I was thinking clearly or conveying into words what I wanted to say.
If it weren't for this board my husband and I probably never would have gone through with the surgery
For eveyone else again I apologize
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