I have gained weight OMG

Hi everyone!!!Well I lost my dad on 8/29. I have gone from 153-165. It is crazy. I am trying to get back on track. Just doing mindless eating. I know what I am doing. I am also the executrix of the estate. I have so much going on. We have to go through everything. There is 50 years of stuff in the house my parents seems to have kept everything. I lost my mom 4 years ago to Alzhimers. She was only 69 and she had the disease for 10years. My dad just passed away from a staph infection. He has been on dialysis for 4 years. So I guess I am a person who eats under stress. I use to dump but haven't lately. Just feel yucky. I was the first one in my family to have this surgery. There is 4 of us and we have lost 500lbs. But today we were going thru some stuff and we were all comparing weight and I am now the biggest. Again. It is so depressing. Anyway I am going to pick my sorry self up and get back on track. I am going to start walking again which I haven't done in weeks. Get my water in which I haven't been doing and start planning what I want to eat instead of just grazing. Just had to vent. Thanks Jane

Jane, you need a stress release...take time out for you first..going through your dads things are so important, I know...but remember your are #1 ...be a bit selfish about yourself and your time...take some time alone away from everything for a day or an evening..do a lot of reflecting and if need be call someone you can vent to..You can always  call me, I hope you know that..

You will be just fine in time.., ...you are dedicated and have such a supportive family..just remember the most stressful part will soon be over ..when it's over where will Jane be in her journey?....sick back and look at what's happening from the outside looking in...what can you do to make it easier and less emotional and stressful...Going through your family things is going through family history and that is hard. ...It's so easy to stress eat and if you are like me grazing seems to be my comfort.. Now take a deep breath and keep telling yourself as hard as it is..eating isn't going to fix it...in the long run it's making it worse..because not only are you dealing with all the family things...you are now dealing with the frustration of gaining weight again...don't get upset with yourself and realize it's how you deal...and now you have to get back to reality...realize you can't deal with the weight gain right now but you can deal with the over eating or grazing  to level it off...deal with the extra lbs once things settle down and you are more easily motivated..  I was so upset over my few lbs of weight gain but I had to stop thinking about it till things got back to a fairly normal place..it's taken me several months and I still fight..what we need is an extra support meeting so we can sit and talk and vent..!! Brenda

Thanks Brenda you always have great words of wisdom.  I should have learned not to post on here about bad stuff.  I don't want to pull anyone down and I have upset all the girls.  I know I will be ok.  Just got in from shopping and have a bunch of paper work to do.  The death certificates came so I need to get busy.  I am walking the cemetary of all places tonight.  Great peaceful walk.  Really hilly and so quiet. I walk here all the time so don't think I'm nuts.   Thanks again Jane

I am sorry to hear of your loss. I too found that I was standing in front of the fridge when my granpa died. It hit me like a ton of bricks... I wasn't hungry, just looking for comfort. You have to take care of yourself right now. Sorting through family history is hard and will cause you to search for comfort items. Try to find a way to work off the stress build up (walking, exercise, etc)  Hang in there.. Sherryl

Thanks Sherrl I was feeling sorry for myself.  I have a great family.  My two sisters are just shy of nuts.  We will get though this.  There is already joy comming from our loss.  We have 3 new babies coming with in the next 8 months and now Amy is getting married.  So we really have a lot of good going on. Jane

Hi Jane, I'm so sorry for your loss! I'm sure this is just stress weight and you will begin to lose again soon. Maybe you could find a very low cal food and whenever you feel the need for comfort food grab that instead? I haven't had surgery yet but am trying to reprogram my head and my arm to reach for something healthy instead of something bad for me. My vice is celery whenever I get bored and look for something to eat I grab some celery instead....course I'm sure after I have wls I won't even be able to eat celery but you know what I mean. Don't beat yourself up for gaining a few pounds you are going through so much and it is not easy to lose a parent, even at our ages we feel like we've just been oprhaned! My heart and prayers go out to you. Also, try not to allow your siblings weight loss bring you down because you are heavier than them instead look at where you have come from and the success you have had through this process. Good luck with what lies ahead going through your father's estate just remember that you don't have to go through everything in a minute but allow yourself time to grieve....Your father named you executor of the estate because he obviously knew you have a good head on your shoulders and will do the right thing.  I'll be keeping you in my prayers. Hugs, Kellie

Thanks kellie  Was feeling sorry for myself.  Doing better today.  Being named executor is ok.  I have a great family and we are sharing all the duties.  Today was a great day. Jane

My wonderful aunt Jane... honey for one thing when we all weighed yesterday, you had layers of clothes on. second of all... with everything going on it was and still is very hard to stay on track. Who cares what you weigh??? Look at how much you have lost!!!!! You got the process started for the entire family... we are ALL healthy now because YOU took the first leap!! Please dont be so hard on yourself. Hell, you still inspire me every day. If it wasnt for you guys... You know where I would be. I love you guys so much!

I know where you would be....... its lost in Covington.  I love ya and I am ok.  Can you make your print bigger.  I can't read it.  It's so small.  Hope you have a great evening.  Everything happens for a reason and I am glad you are inspired.  You hold a special place in my heart. Love you this much Aunt Jane

Jane, I am so sorry you are having to go through all of this.  I lost my mom on 6/25/05 and then on 8/24/05, my baby sister (who was 33) was killed.  My sister had lived with my mom her whole life. Out of six siblings, there is only my brother and me left.  My dad died at the age of 63 from prostate cancer in August of 1993, then April 14 of 1994 my 9 1/2 year old son died and then on Sept 18 of 1994 my 37 year old brother dropped dead in church.  I was the execetrix (sp) of my moms and sisters estate.  I ate myself up to the heaviest I have ever been.  We had to go through my moms stuff, my dads and my sisters.  At times it was so overwhelming I just went to bed and could not cope.  It will just take time, that is all I can say.  Each day you will get a little better without realizing it. You never forget them and the memories you have.  Nothing anyone says can help much at this time, please just know that you are not alone and  please believe me that in time things will get better.  I am now able to laugh again and smile, yes there are those days when I will break down and cry and that's ok.  There is no right or wrong time for grieving, each person is different.  I never thought we would ever get through going through the house and the stuff, it seemed after daddy died my mom kept every scrap of paper and all kinds of stuff.  My aunt and uncle helped us out when we couldnt go through anything else, maybe you have some family members that could help you.  My prayers and thoughts are with you.  Blessings.