Kind of upset!

Was told i should concider my age for having RNY, and that LAP band would be better cause i will gain my weight back anyway, Iam 53, i dont think iam to old to help myself . and was told Atkins was some what like having this surgery, it cant be because i have done the Atkins 3 times and have lost but gained it back and more.Help! What to do ? should i just not listen to some people? iam i to old to do this? is my bmi to high for the LAP RNY? Can not turn my brain off! Any sugestions? Thanks! Delilah

Yes...DO NOT LISTEN TO IGNORANT PEOPLE...I will be 50 in july...Too Old...No way...You have seen the success of many people on here, of all different ages...You have seen the problems that people have gone through before surgery...and for that matter afterwards...You also know what being obese can do to your body in the long run...Ask yourself...Why am I considering surgery....The probable answer will be...its the last resort...I have tried everything else...and nothing works... And that you want to live longer and healthier...Is this easy?....No...But Oh so worth it...Am I on my soap Box...Yes I am...This really irritates me that people think that they know what is best for us, when they have No idea of what we have lived with most of our lives...Sure some people gain some weight back after WLS...and my theory on that is that they started back to eating things they knew were wrong...WLS is a life long committment. Do what you feel is right for YOU...and to He$$ with what anyone else thinks... Sure it can be a scary decision...But so is the unkown of being obese, and dying from complications from diabetes...My husband died from complications from diabetes, and heart disease at the age of 53... In his last 3 years he lost both legs, one of his arms, and was on dialysis...He lost everything because of these horrible diseases, including obesity... Ok off my soap box... We love you Delilah, and if you need support you will get it here... Amy

Thanks Amy , i know what being over weight can do my mother was a dibetic, and had heart decease, and bone cancer, she has passed at age 70, my father had heart problems, they both had high blood pressure he died from a stroke, i want to help my self and if i cant get it done iam, i dont want all these medical problems, my dad passed at age 54,a brother 56, a brother 39, a sister age 47, so you can see why its real inportant for me to get help Gods will ! i know i shouldnt listen to this person but,i guess she just says what she feels.I thank you for all the support i can get. Delilah

Delilah, Was it your dr. that said you were too old? My dr. does them as old as 70 (or 69yrs) depending on the health of the individual. (I guess this means whether they'd be able to handle the surgery nad all.) I did the Atkins diet too and lost a nice amount of weight as well, only to gain it back, so I understand completely your frustration. What does your doc say? Thanks-- Dee

It was someone in the family that really doesnt know much about any of these surgeries,only experience she has is losing thriugh Atkins, but i told her this surgery is a tool and you have to follow rules, or u will gain some back if you don****ch what you do, No after the New Year i plan on making my one on one with the dr. Thanks for caring delilah

Hi Delilah, I'd consider the source before making that decision. Was it someone that has had the surgery? Did they gain the weight back because they didn't follow good eating guidelines? Or someone that has heard of someone that has heard of someone that knows someone that had it? (You know the type...well-meaning but not very informed!) Personally, I'd listen to Dr. Sonnanstine. If he says you should have one over the other...then he's the one that would know best. If he says either and you're leaning toward RNY, then let your own judgement be the guide based on info from Dr. Sonnanstine. I personally think those that have gained the weight back after Lap Band or RNY did so because they got lazy with what they ate. They didn't eat healthy food and in quanitities needed to maintain their weightloss. Your BMI is not to high for Lap RNY. Mine is 71....and I had it with no problem. I'm also losing with it. I go for my 2 week post op on Thursday, but according to my scale I'm down about 28 pounds. (Which means my BMI is no longer 71!) Chris

Hi Chris ! no it wasnt the dr. someone in the family and the only diet that works for her is Atkins,and she has gone on it lots of times only to gain it back and i told her so,she said i should concider my age, and i guess it just upset me cause i have been looking into this surgery for a while now and i know what to expect and not and she doesnt know anything about any of it really, I have read on here how many it has helped, i see it helping my daughter every day, its a wonderful thing and i iam going to have my one on one after the New Year with dr. Tom, Thanks for all the support, from everyone Delilah

Another thing to consider too Delilah is that your friend might feel threatened on you having this surgery. People's lives change for the better in so many different ways, that a lot of old friends (and family) just can't cope with those changes. My mother and father before the surgery told me that they didn't understand why I was going the surgery route, because I would just end up failing anyways. Well 69lbs. later (and still counting), they are verblely supportive, but their actions still fight what I've done. In other words, they're not really all that much of a support network for Mike and I. You have to do what is right for you and not listen to others. I think you should listen to your doc and go with what's in your heart and what is in your best interests. Good luck to you-- Dee

Ok I am gonna borrow Amy's soapbox for a min. I was told all kinda of thing before my surgery. That I was too young, I was a quitter, and so on. Sad thing was it was mostly the people I care about most. I have now found out that they didn't want me to lose so they can feel better. To heck with them I have recently lost a friend because of her ranting on me. Told me I was NOT allowed to lose to look better than her and that I should have never had the surgery yet before she told me I was fat. I am not saying to not keep that person who said that close to you but again like others have said consider the source. Are they happy with themselves? Don't sound like it. Maybe they mean well but in reality it's your chouce to make. A hard one but all your own to make. I happen to know you have a great Dr. and you will be in wonderful hands. Do what your heart says not what others say. Ok even tho I like being taller I am giving Amy's soapbox back now I am done ranting lol.

You are definitely not too old. I have met people who were in their sixties when they had WLS. As far as your BMI goes I think everyone is different. My BMI was 58 on the day of surgery and the surgeon said the chances of completing it LAP were 50/50 for me. In my case I told him I didn't care if he gutted me like a fish as long as he completed it. In fact we discussed him just doing it open without even attempting the LAP. He said he could do that but I might as well let him try the LAP. He said he had completed one a few days before as a LAP on a lady whose BMI was 80. He started mine as a LAP but had to convert to an open about an hour in. I am thrilled with the results though. As far as other people go, just ignore them and do what is best for you. They don't have to live your life and deal with the things you do. Good Luck