Family thinks I'm taking the easy way and being lazy

Once they see how you have to change so much of your life in order for this to work...they will shut right up. Mine did! They were really surprised to see how I have to watch what I eat, measure my food, eat slowly, plate size, food choices, etc....It was at a Christmas party and the real shocker was me walking right past the deserts and not even looking at them..let alone tasting any of them!

Thank you guys. Thank goodness I found this board

THIS IS NOT THE EASY WAY OUT!!!!!!  The best thing you can learn to do for yourself is surround yourself with people that are a positive influence on you and the people that are a negative influence on you.......to put it bluntly......if they continue to be a negative influence on you and say negative things TO YOU about what you are doing to make positive changes in your life, then you need to avoid them as much as possible.

They can't back up what they are saying with their mouth!  They've not tried it.  This is what I say:  "I may have my stomach stapled but:

No one buys my groceries for me, I had to learn what to put into my grocery cart and also     learn the self control about what NOT to put in my grocery cart and bring into my home.

No one puts the food in MY mouth but me, or tells me how slow to eat, or tells me when to stop eating.  This takes lots of self control.

No one plans my meals for me or my food choices.  I don't have my own personal chef. 

No one does my exercise for me.

No one stops me from hopping in my car and going through that drive up window at the fast food restaurant and ordering the value meals with biggie fries and soda pop.

These are just a few of the many changes that I've made in my life of maintaining my BMI since my surgery in Sept 2000.  The stomach stapling gave me a jump start sort of like jumper cables recharging a battery.  You still have to "Maintain" the rest of the engine to keep the car running well and also put good fuel into it.  

You'll gain more confidence in your decision after you're post op and start  losing  some weight. 

hugs,
Kat

Has your mother ever been "large"?  I found that my boss (a man) thought that if you exercised and just didn't eat as much you would lose weight.  Now that makes sense, but I did that to the letter and did not lose weight.  We talked about it.  He just couldn't imagine.  He couldn't reason it out.   He has never been large!  He didn't know how desperate you can be to lose the weight so that you can live!   But then there were others that are large and they were just plain jealous!  I hate it for them!   They have to reason out why not to have it in their own mind.

You have to know that you are doing it for you!  We have been programmed to believe that we are not important but WE ARE!   You go girl.....You are going to be alright!

 

Ayreka,

Like all those before me, I agree that for the heavy people around you it is part jealosy (you've been brave enough to take the step) and part fear that you will leave them behind.  In the case of your mother, if she has never had a weight problem, she can't understand why you do.  My sister was always one of those people who could just change her eating habits for a few weeks and drop whatever weight she wanted.  Then she developed health issues and the meds they have her on don't allow her to do that anymore.  Even with this development, though, she doesn't fully understand what it was like for me.  In her mind, her weight is caused by meds and I didn't have that "excuse".  But after watching all I've had to go through (diet change, excerise habits and even my struggles to maintain now that I'm farther out) she has a better understanding of how much "work" this really is.  Your family will most likely come around.  But even if they don't, you have to remember that you've made this decision for your own better health, not to make them feel better about you or themselves.

The decision to have wls is momentous and difficult for each of us.  But once we make up our minds, it is one of the most exciting things we will ever experience, so just be happy for yourself and come here when you need a pick me up.  You won't find a better group of people anywhere.