Need some Advise

I have a girlfriend I work with who I've gotten pretty close to in the last couple of months.  She's been doing Weigh****chers for the last year or so.  She has done a wonderful job and lost 50 lbs during the first year.  She is now into year 2 - and can't seem to loose anything.  Well now she's watching the weight fall off of me and she's struggling to keep the 50 lbs off and can't seem to loose anymore.  I want to be a positive influence for her but she's started to be down on herself and say things like you skinny butt and my fat ass.  I don't know what to say to her to help her get off her own case and do the best she can.  They continue to tell her at WW she can still loose the other 100 lbs she wants to loose.  My own experience with WW is they'll tell you anything to keep you coming back and spending money there.  Any ideas on how to be more positive to her?  It's not going to come off for her like it has for me...at times I feel guilty because I was able to afford the surgery thanks to Tony's insurance.  One thing I was blessed with before he left

Thanks ladies - I know SOMEONE out here has an answer or idea for me.

Huggs!!

Frankie

Frankie,

Just about anyone can lose weight the first year they are post-op. After that? It takes having some good lifestyle choices in order to keep losing or to maintain it off. Those choices are the ones that would had benefitted us the most pre-op. those choices TO ME are:

1.  Journal what you put in your mouth. It is so easy to think 'it's small, I'll eat three' without realizing they are 100 calories each! I recommend SparkPeople.com. It will also help you to determine how many calories, etc you should be getting in in order to lose weight.

2. Journal your liquids & exercise also. Again, SparkPeople is a fantastic place for that. If you burn more calories than you eat/drink, you'll lose weight. It's that simple. Drink AT LEAST 64 ounces of water..or decaf/non-carbonated/sugar-free liquids...every single day.

3. Up your PEW: Protein Exercise Water. That applies to everyone, rather if they have had WLS or not. I know that pre-op, I certainly did not get enough lean protein..and I hated water. Shoot. I wasn't too keen on exercising either.

Just because someone hasn't had WLS doesn't mean they can't try to do the same things we do. Explain to her the things that have changed in your life. Oh..I would REALLY recommend that she begins to get into reading labels. It's hard to know how bad something is for you if you don't know how to interpret those labels.

Wish her luck..and encourage her to join our board. We are 'OBESITYHELP'..not 'weight loss surgery help.

huggs,

Sherri
 

Oh Frankie
Just being her friend is a good thing,i would let her know that the things she says makes me feel uncomfortable.
But tell her you will exercise with her and show her how to eat healthy.
Take her to one of Tracys support group meetings.
But dont feel bad because you were able to have the surgery i have a cuz who says to me all the time well im not as lucky as you were to have the surgery.
She calls me miss look at me.
Makes me want to slap her silly.
But just be her friend and be honest with her.
I love you Frankie

Lisa,

I'd like to slap anyone silly that thinks we took the 'EASY' way out! I am SOOOOO waiting for the 'EASY"' part of this journey! Some people just don't realize, huh? You just can't help stupid like you can help fat..you know?

love ya!

Sherri

lmao sherri
i just spit my water everywhere
when joey was in headstart he was 4.5 i got a phone call to come get him and he was no longer in the program,why because he was chunky and the kids where going up the slide and the little boy said your so fat move and joeys reply was yell well i am fat and i can go on a diet but you will always be ugly when the teacher told me i couldnt help but bust out laughing and say thats my boy he speaks the truth.
Its not easy at all and the risks are out there and then them to think we just have surgery and bam its all better.love ya to Sherri
Frankie i forgot i had a friend who lost 110 pounds in 1 yr on weigh****chers as soon as she stopped the program boom it was coming back,its like with our surgery she has to work at it,share what you learned with her.

OMG!   Sherri!!!!   You just made my day.  I loved that line. 

You just can't help stupid like you can help fat..you know?

That is so true!  I have been experiencing that with some people in my life lately!  Ya know?!


LOL.

Hey...you didn't think that Christie was the only one that can make monitor-ruining comments, did you? LOL! I originally heard that line as 'You can help fat, but there's only so much you can do with ugly'. lol!

Sherri

Frankie,
I wish I had some to advice to help. Like, Lisa & Sherri said she is blessed having a friend like you, who cares so much. I tried weigh****chers for years, I lost some but gained more.
I am 2years & 2 months since my WLS and yes I had some bumps in my joinery, But, I would do it again !!
The day of my surgery I weight in at 427lbs today I just got off the scales I weight 138.7 lbs. I get my protein in, drink water all the time and I exercise by dancing !!!! Sometimes I am scared to no end I might gain weight back, but I eat healthy. And I want to live & not take 12 kinds of meds. If I know you, you are a great friend and will do what you feel is right. Your friend is so blessed to have you on her side. And I agree take her to a support meeting. Love you, Big Hugs & Many Blessings, Gail

Frankie~

Maybe your friend just needs !!!   No, really that was just for you!   

You are such a good friend...Amber is lucky to have you.  Smile!  Of course WW is a business, so while they help people lose weight, this is not the primary focus.  IMO, it would be extremely difficult to lose 100 more pounds with the WW plan and well as keeping it off. 
I think you're doing the best you can do.  Maybe when the weather gets nicer, you can walk on your lunchtime together.  Heck, maybe i can come down and walk with both of ya!  Smile!  I think it's great you have such great accountability partners there where you work...especially since you spend so much time there.  :)  
We've all been where your friend is.  I personally did not try WW, but have done so many other programs, it's really not funny!  The last one I did promised results and even had a "doctor" on staff.  Was that ever a joke!  Deciding to have WLS is such a personal decision.  However, if your friend decides to ever do this (I know, big step...lots of issues to tackle)...you're be right there cheering her on.  The 50lb weight loss is amazing!  I hope she can keep it off! 
Maybe it would help her to get on one of those food tracking sites like fitday.com, the dailyplate.com and others.  She could also (manual labor) journal intake/output.  Maybe if it's something you do together, she will feel more supported.  Good luck!  You are a great support! 

Love ya, girlfriend!