Don't feel welcome

Hi Leah,
I am so sorry that you didn't feel welcome here!! We are just like a big family and like big families we get busy and don't mean to ignore anyone. Or at least I don't. Yeah I remember how it felt in high school and the cliques! I would not want anyone to feel that way! OMG how awful I always felt!! Girl friend please continue to post and if you have any questions just ask and I am sure someone will come to your aid. I would love to be your friend also but I live up close to Kokomo so we would just have to be phone and P.M. friends mostly. If you could send me your phone number I would be glad to give you a call. Please do that! I really mean it! Can never have too many friends! Michelle

Howdy Leah...I'm sorry you feel that way. Sure, there are a few people here who live close enough to actually visit with each other, so they will have more in common and have more to talk about. I don't think anyone wants you (or anyone else) to feel left out. Why do you feel that way? Are you not getting responses to your posts, or what?

Let us know what we're doing to offend you, and we'll quit it!

Jenny

Leah, I am sorry you feel this way but I understand. I don't post on a regular basis but when I do everyone is nice. I attend all of the OH functions that I can and once again everyone is super. I just don't feel that I have gotten to know  everyone very well. For me, I blame myself. I never let myself get too close to anyone when I was heavy and I still keep my gaurd up. I am sometimes envious of the peiple on here that have become great friends. I am 54 years old and have not allowed myself  to learn to be a friend. I am trying to break out of my shell and move forward. I don't know if this pertains to your situation, but I thought that I would share this. Keep posting and I know you will find out how wonderful everyone is on this board. Try to come to the ornament exchange. I would love to meet you! Jana

Leah!!!  Girl!  I have to tell ya, I feel like you are such a part of this family.  I love reading your posts!  I look forward to hearing from you.  Please don't feel like there is a click on here at all.  The job I just lost was VERY clickish.  I hated that feeling.  Believe me when I say that everyone on here has the biggest heart.  Only the bad stuff melts away .  Everyone on here that I have communicated with has lost weight but not the huge hearts full of love for the OH family.  Please make a point of trying to come to the ornament exchange so we can all meet you.  You will find that everyone loves you and considers you one of our WLS siblings.

If you have the directory, my number is in it.  Call me anytime.  I'd love to talk to you.

Huge hugs and lots of OH family love for ya.

Tracy

I know exactly how you feel!  I feel like since I didn't have my surgery at St Vincent's that I am the "bad child" and don't fit in.  I have posted on this forum in the past but got very little response.  I don't post often on any of the forums but mainly lurk on this one.

Leah,

I am so sorry that you feel that you are not welcome!

We try to welcome everyone on here! I have seen this in the past as well! Also, not having had had your surgery at a particular hospital, etc! I however, didn't have my surgery at St. V's either, but I still feel welcome! It was a little harder in the beginning, but I posted as often as I could have! Sometimes, I know with myself, I just don't post on a particular thread, because what I was going to say, had already been said, so I didn't want to repeat- I know, probably wrong, but that is my mind playing the trick of don't bother with repeating for fear of NOT wanting to HEAR it again!

I can relate to YORKIEMOM, I have a hard time coming out of my shell, too! I LOVE to talk on the phone, BUT I hate being the one to iniaiate- WRONG, too- I know BUT I feel as if everyone, or whomever it is that I should be/need to talk with has a life, other issues and I don't want to interfere or BOTHER them ,whoever it is! It sounds ridiculous, but that is my mindset! I feel so much better after I have made/received the phonecalls and have spoken to my OH friends/family But I still keep doing the same crazy stuff! Another issue, with me inparticular, i don't know what to say, like when in medical need, I think I sound like a broken record- keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, wishing for the best outcome, hope you find some answers soon, and good luck to you on your journey no matter where you are at in it- BUT that seems to be my signature line, ugh!

Anyway- I do hope that you do not think that you are not wanted or cared for by our Hoosier Losers, you are! Please do try and make it to the ornament exchange! I have been to one and it was awesome! I also hosted many of the clothing exchanges and was able to feel more welcomed and wanted/fit in etc, by doing so! I miss not hosting them, but, enjoy going to the ones that Robin has hosted and still enjoy meeting the new family and revisiting with my old pals and family! I hope that this all is making sense!

I along with many on here are being faced with some issues- all of which are important- each for our own reasons! That being said, noone should feel that their issues/needs/support is any less important than the next- new or not!

I will be having my 3 year anniversary this week and am hoping to continue seeing you post and offer your input to those in the future on your 3rd year anniversary, as well!

I have met some great people, made some wonderful friends, and been helped by many, some that I didn't even really know and yet at times still feel/felt that I too was unworthy of this kindness!/friendship!

I am still a work in progress even after 3 years and hope to someday feel comfortable within myself to enjoy the progresses that I have made and yet be strong enough with it to open up and let the friendships that I have begun to form, completely bloom! I hope that you too will enjoy that with me and be a part of that!

Please feel free to call me, anytime! I promise, I too, will try to give you a call in return!

I do not have an updated copy of the Directory so please feel free to send me a number, if you would like!
 
Hugz Dawn

Hi, I'm new to OH.  I'm a DS pre-op, and I'm scheduled for surgery on February 25, 2009 at St. Vincent's. 

I want you to know that I've felt like the "bad child" in support groups, because I'm usually the only one prepping for a DS.  I did get to speak with a lady in Bloomington who had a DS when I attended as support group there, and I traveled from Mishawaka, IN to that one.   Even in my own group here, I'm the only one who's prepping fo the DS, and to the RNY'ers, it's like I'm taking "the easy way out".  My problem has always been quantity, not a specific food, and I'm and emotional eater (binge when upset). Support group members always assume that I have chosen DS, because I want to eat anything. 

That is partially true.  I chose DS because when I resume my work life (My weight, along with other factors has disabled me) business meetings that include food will be part of it.  With a DS, I wouldn't "stand out", in terms of what I would order, and could covertly stick to my DS diet.

All of that is down the road for me, but please don't feel like the "bad child'.  Indiana is just slow in picking up on this technique. It's been done in other places for years, mostly in major city hospitals, and places like the  Mayo Clinic.

DS'ers of the world, unite!  Yes we can!

Congrats on your upcoming DS!

I had the RNY, but my insurance would only cover the RNY! For many we really have to choose what is allowed by our insurance!

I do not believe that any procedure is better than the next- that being said, I believe that all of us should research, research, research and do what is best for us, individually! For me, like I said, I pretty much had to make a change for my health and at the time the RNY was my option through insurance, I love my RNY and am pleased to have been given the chance to have wls and prolong my life for myself with better health!

I am sorry that you have had to feel uncomfortableness for your choice of the DS! We do have some that post every once in a while that have had the DS, please feel free to join in and know that we are all here for support, no matter what surgery type, what hospital, what city or part of the state that you/ we are from! We are the HOOSIER LOSERS!

Everyone has been welcomed to all of our get togethers and events! They have been enjoyed by many! Please feel free to participate in them! The majority of us have had the RNY BUT that doesn't mean that we do not want to help and or support our fellow wls friends/family that have had other procedures- there are quite a few that have had lap band and we love them, too!
Keep in mind that we do often have pitch-ins and all of our dietary needs are different, that too is why we usually have a recipe card that we can offer for our dish, that way we can decide if this is a choice that we choose to partake in, enjoy or not! Whether it be dietary, allergy, or dislike!

Again, welcome and good luck to you on your chosen path of WLS, I  hope your journey is as rewarding and enjoyable for you, as mine has been for me! Hugz Dawn

I believe ALL WLS'ers should unite- we are all making a better healthier decision for each of us! Be healthy and happy in the choice you have chosen! Hugz Dawn

Hmmm...well, I had mine at Clarian North and I feel right at home here! C'mon you guys, I've never seen anything close to a mean post here. Give everyone a chance, I think you'll find some awesome people!

Jenny

Leah,

I'm sorry you feel this way. I don't think anyone purposely tries to omit anyone (regardless of if they even had surgery or where they had it...or what kind they had).  Sure..I may not respond to all the posts that everyone puts out there, but that's not because I'm cliquish but usually because I just have nothing new to add.

I would like to invite you and everyone else to participate in the conversations here, and the activities we have, etc.

I hope that you take me up on this invitation. If you don't, no one has the opportunity to get to know you. I have been on this board for ~5 years. I try to keep up with all the new people but I just don't have enough hours in the day...so I tend to reply to those I feel I can add a meaningful comment to. If I don't reply to your posts it's not a reflection on you or your post. I just don't see where I can help, that's all.

Sherri