Sad, Confused, prayers needed.....

Marianne, sorry for your loss, I know you feel something in your heart for Alice.  I also was adopted and will have to share my story with you one day.  I am so happy that you and your sister have a relationship.
Hope to meet you one day.

Sheila E.

Sheila, I would say yes my heart feels something for Alice. We do not have any mother/daughter connection but I am so grateful for the gift she gave me in letting me be adopted. God placed me with the best parents a girl could ever have and I have been so blessed. My parents are awesome! They have been married 66 years and are the cutest couple you have ever seen. :o) Mom is so petite at barely 5 feet and Dad is only about 5'7" so it was always cute to see us as a family in church. Here I am 6 foot and my brother (also adopted) is 6 foot also so we are there with litle parents...lol My parentshave always been there for me even in the tough times. When I had my bariactric surgery they came down the night before and insisted on being there with my husband during my surgery. I think that was the first time my father was away from home overnight since he came home for WW2! lol I look forward to sharing your story some day :o)
Take care and be blessed!
Hugs!
Marianne

I will put you on my prayer list.  I totally understand your feelings.  My oldest two daughters were raised by me and then adopted by my second husband.  I always told them they could meet their biological father when they turned 18 and left it at that.  My second daughter decided to meet him when she turned 18 but felt no connection and has since decided he is nothing more than a person she knows through the family.  She has a Dad and he adopted and raised her at age 3.  It's ok with me that she feels that way.  I know he was never there for her from the beginning.  She tells me that DNA does not spell DAD.  She loves her Daddy and doesn't care to make a change just because Paul was the biological donor so to speak.

I am proud of her for being a strong woman and I can see you are very much a strong woman as well.  Tonah is lucky to have you in her life and you are lucky to have her as well. 

Take care and Your family is in my prayers,
Tracy

Tracy, your daughter has feelings I totally understand. ;o) Being raised in a family has alot more to do than genetics have. I will admit there are simalarities we may share with blood relatives but that is not what makes us who we are. :o) We all remember who was there when we were sick with chicken pox, measles, went thru the rough teen years and who was alway there when our world fell apart. When my parents had their 50th wedding anniversary celebration open house at the church, I got up and spoke in front of the congregation. You see it was their wedding anniversary but they also receive a phone calls many years prior on their anniversary asking if they would be interested in adopting a little girl. They came to the hospital the next day to get me so i was truly an anniversary present. :o) After church that day a couple came up to me and told me they couldn't have theiri own children and were thinking of adopting but they weren't sure if it was right for them or not. After seeing the relationship my parents have had with their 2 children they were in tears and thanking us for sharing as they then knew if God blessed them with an adopted child they would trust him for their joys too.
Thank you for sharing and your prayers.
Hugs!
Marianne

Marianne,

I am so sorry to see what you are going through.  I admire the strength, love and support you are providing to Tonah.   I am sure God brought you together for that reason. 

You were honest with Alice and have been honest with Tonah regarding Alice.  I'm sure she appreciates and understands where you are coming from in regards to the relationship with Alice.  She sounds like a wonderful tower of strength for her family as you must be for her.

Don't second guess yourself with the girls and their relations with Alice.  You did what you thought was best given all the information at the time.  God knows your heart.

I pray for peace in your spirit and Tonah's' as you struggle through this time together.

Julie

My prayers go out to you and your sister.
It sounds like you and her have alot in common you both are caring people.
Sounds like Alice gave you a happy life by giving you to a family that could love you.
Your sister knows you wonna be there with her and in her heart you are.
My aunt is dying and her and my uncle had a rocky past and she had a couple of kids that werent his,one has known all along the other was just told,he took it better than we thought he would..But the daughter has been reaching out to her real dad and he ignores her and i watch her hurt she has brothers and sisters and   there is no contact but she abides by his wishes and just stays back.
I  thinks its great that you 2 sisters have a great relationship and she is gonna need her big siter now forsure..Thats very sweet of Alice to leave something for the kids..
Lots of prayers and huggs coming your way..