Dating Sucks

I have been divorced for a few years and have dated quite a bit, but not for the past several months. This week I was talking to a guy and he asked me if I wanted to meet up this week. We made plans for Thursday night. Last night, I read his online profile again and I must not have read it when he first emailed me because he wrote that he likes smaller, petite women. WTH?! So I emailed him and said, basically, I saw that you said this and I'm short, but I'm not "petite" and mentioned I had just had gastric bypass surgery. I also attached a photo of myself (not at my heaviest. LOL).

His reply? "Thanks for your honesty. Let's just be fair to each other and move on. Best of luck to you."

OMG I was in tears last night, not because of him, because hello, he's a jackass, but because once AGAIN my weight is an issue even while I'm doing something about it.

Oh, and the kicker -- when I was deleting a photo he had sent me, I realized it was FIVE YEARS OLD! So he's freaked about my weight but sent me a photo of himself at 35 (he's now 40). ARGH!

I'm sorry he was just a jerk to you. I'm soo thankful I'm not having to date anymore. (( HUG ))
You are doing amazing and are gorgeous, don't let anyone tell you different.

i have a friend who has been on eharm*** for a year and cannot meet anyone he matches with.....Why? Because he puts himself out there to be the person he wishes he was instead of the spoiled three year old trapped in a mans body that still lives off mommy and daddy and is as irresponsible as they come. He was worried about girls not liking the fact he is bald (shaves head due to disappearing hairline) Once he meets a girl he blows it by being himself.  People get on these places and expect to meet Mr/Mrs Perfect when they themselves are not! Good for you for being upfront and honest! Pi** on him for being so superficial and phony himself!  Sounds like you dodged a bullet with him! 

Catherine,

I wouldn't look at it as your weight 'kept' you from getting a guy. I would look at it that it helped to weed out a total jerk! If I were a size 2 and had always been a size 2, I would not want to be with a man who is only interested in petite women because that shows just how closed minded he is!  So no...your weight is NOT the issue...him being an a$$ is.

There ARE men out there who prefer BBW's...Big Beautiful Women. You have to be careful with some of them too because with some of them, once you lose weight, they wouldn't want you either. I was concerned some about that with Bill (my dh) because I'm his 4th wife (he's also my 4th hubby) and ALL of the Mrs. Johnsons have been overweight to some degree. Bill however has NO preference based on height, weight, color of hair or nationality...so he's  to me! If a guy wants to get picky about something, let it be personality, intelligence, sence of humor, moral standing...things that actually DO matter in life!

I sincerely believe that there is someone out there for everyone. Keep looking and keep your chin up! He's out there just waiting for YOU!

Sherri

Catherine - I am also attempting to enter into the dating scene after having been divorced 5+ years.  So far I have had no luck in anyone contacting me through the online site I am on.  I have pretty well decided that if I ever get the chance to make contact with someone I meet on line to totally avoid the subject of WLS.  I want them to get to know me first.  My biggest fear is that some gas will slip out by accident while we are together and he will label me as a biohazard and that will be the end of that.  How are you coping with this situation?  Help!  Karen

His lose sweetie!!!!!  I saw a coffee cup that had a saying on it.  DATING IS LIKE A GAME OF TUG-OF-WAR....ONE JERK AT A TIME.. This is sooooooooooo true at times.  Keep your head up and continue on your wt. lose journey and the right one will show up when you dont expect it too....HUGZ

AHHH sweetie
Im so sorry you encountered this jerk but better now than later.
My brother and some of my friends are doing the online dating i dont think i could..
I know in watching my friends struggling trying to find true love just how lucky i am to have neil, he took me as i was and i know he truly loves me.
I am telling you there is somebody out there for you and it will be when you least expect it..it happened to me.
My oldest is 25 and he has little self esteem thinks he is fat and ugly and nobody would want him so he just doesnt try,but i ask him about a heavy girl and he said to me mom its whats on the inside that counts ..
Good luck and remember  you are beautiful and honest and he shows you and old pic wonder what he is hiding..lol

Thanks, everyone, for your support. I know there are men who like BBWs but, like Sherri said, that doesn't always work out! One guy I would hang out with seemed to lose interest in me "that way" after I had the surgery. Crazy! At least dating gives me stories to tell. LOL