Enemies?...after loosing 268 pounds

Hello Everyone! I want to ask if any of you have had any negative dealings with people about your weight loss? Any close family members that you can tell are not pleased with you? I'm trying to learn to not care about what people think, but THAT's easier said than done!!! You would think that people would be shouting with you because of having your life back again...living...being ALIVE!!! I really would like to hear from those of you who could take the time to share your situations with me...I'd be very grateful for any insight. Thanks bunches!!! Love, Cindy

Cindy~ Yes, I have dealt with my share of negative responses about my weight loss. Unfortunately, some of it came from my own family. At 365 pounds, I was always the heaviest between my sisters and I and all of the females in our family. And I was always the one who felt inferior to others and never felt that I was good enough. Now, I am smaller than my sisters and smaller than most of the women in my family. Some are happy for me and some are not and say that I've changed. My personality has changed, but it has changed for the better. I am now so happy that I smile all the time, I am confident, 'm bubbly, I actually FEEL pretty (something that I've never felt). And not everyone likes that....some people took comfort in the fact that they weren't the biggest and they knew that they could count on Jaimee to feel and look the worst. It has made me angry because I have done so much to better myself and I am the type of person who is always happy for people and proud of them. I feel that they should be happy for me but I've accepted the fact that not everyone will, but that is okay. I've come to understand that I don't need the approval and thumbs up from everyone. I did this for myself, not for them. Jaimee

nothing bad from family...but now, i have lost a couple of close friends...and one had even had wls herself, but she did not get near goal...and grazed and gained back, where as we could be good for each other keeping the other on track, she chose to go her own way.........other wise other friends and family have been very supportive...

You look wonderful and I am sure feel better...you know those friends or family who can't celebrate with you the long journey you have made and the success you have then they are not worth another thought...those are mean spirited people who have to be jealous about your success and can't imagine what will and determination it took to have such success. I know personally that people who haven't weight issues don't realize what you go through...I am proud of you and don't even know you...Linda

Cindy, I know what you are going through. I have several friends who are treating me differently (one who had WLS and did well - I think I stepped on her turf). But the one that really hurts is my sister. She is older than me, prettier than me, smaller than me, more talented than me (but I'm not bitter ). She was not happy with my decision to have the surgery. She thought it was too dangerous. But she came and stayed with me for my first couple of days at home and I thought she was okay with it. The trouble started after my weight loss became apparent. She acts as if I'm not even in the room. She is fine on the phone, just not in person. My DH (degree in Psychology) says she cannot accept the fact that I no longer fit the profile she has in her head for me. She views me as competition in a way that I have never been before. I could easily, in a few more months, be the smaller sister. I have my revenge planned. A few months before my surgery she invited me over while she cleaned out her closet. She is a real estate broker and has lots of VERY nice clothes. She gave me all her 16s and 14s (she's a size 12). I was grateful to get them. But while she's doing this she says, "Here, take these. I don't ever want to get THAT big again." Last week I found a Calvin Klein suit at TJ Maxx, size 12, navy, very classy. I can't wait until the day when it is too big. I'm going to give it to her and say, "Here, take this. I don't ever want to get THAT big again." My DD and DIL who were with me the day she gave me her clothes have asked for front row seats to that event. Hang in there. There are plenty of us re-born gals to be friends with. We will never judge you because of your size, big or small. We know it is the heart that counts! Annette

Hi Cindy, Yes, unfortunatly we do have "enemies " in our mist. My sis is over 350# and last time I saw her(Christmas) she couldn't even look at me without a glare. Sorry to say, some people just resent that we have done something to improve our life/ health. My younger Sis, who never has had a problem with weight, makes comments like-" are you sure you don't want to hang onto your "fat clothes"~~ you'll need them." : I think as we progress we have to set boundries with our "non-supporters". Some of the things I do are- I change the subject, say "thanks for sharing", and "huh, what did you say, I wasn't paying attention." Ooh, that gets them!!! You have done a wonderful job, and have every reason to feel good about your accomplishments!!! ((((hugs)))) Ellen