I'm getting nervous about

our family Christmas party. None of my siblings have seen me for months. I am the youngest of twelve kids so I never escape their judgemental wrath. I haven't seen some of them since last year's party(60 lbs) ago. I don't really care what their opinions on me having the surgery are, but they are very verbal-----especially when it comes to me. I don't want to be the center focus, but some acceptance would be nice. My mother(bless her) is no help at all. She's never been fat and thinks she's huge because she's a 12P and 74 years old. Her opinion is that I shouldn't talk about it at all, but that makes me mad because she tells me that about everything and I end up going in there and being a "good little girl" and not standing up for myself.  The issue is...I don't quite feel like getting verbally trampled and I don't think I want to take it like a mouse anymore. None of them have had to face the life and death challenges I've had to over the last year and I deserve some respect for the pro-active path I chose. It took a lot of guts to go through all this and continue going through it. I am more proud of myself than I ever have been. And, while writing this, I just realized that I'll be okay. I've earned the right to face up to them and anyone else. We all have. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Hugs, Angie

You can not change the opinions of other people they need to discover them for themselves.  Be happy with yourself and dismiss others feelings or ideas.  Offer them information to find the answer themselves from independent sources. I find leading people to informational sights works.  I go to weigh****cher meetings with my wife because that is the choice she has chosen to lose weight.  I give advice at some of these meetings on food choices but am looked at only as her support person.  I do not tell them I had surgery.  One they do not understand, they are scared, and Weigh****chers does work if you follow the plan.  In fact as I get farther along I plan on using the point values for tracking my intake. In fact they don't even have to know you had the surgery.  A person can lose lots of weight with diet and exercises.  Look at the show Biggest Loser.  When asked by people now how I have lost weight I say the secret is to burn more calories then I consume.  It is true just easier with surgery then before. E