Just venting

You know, I was under the impression that these forums, and Q&A sections were for helping and supporting each other. Why is it that when someone has a genuine struggel and posts a question for help, some people have to bash them? I'm really getting tired of seeing this, you know. It's not enough we have to get hounded by people in our life who don't understand what we are going through, I've seen some call those people "food nazis" or "food police" lol, but for those on here who know what we are going through to bash someone for having a hard time with something is just not right. I know there is nothing I can do to change it, but you know I finally had to have my say, in a nice way. If I EVER have something to say that might in any way come across as mean or rude I sit here and really think how I'm wording things before I do because the last thing I want to do is degrade someone or make them feel like they are a failure. That defeats the TOTAL purpose of this site, doesn't it? I wish people would quit being so judgemental. Ideas, suggestions and comments are helpful and absolutely wanted when I have a question but I don't want to see YELLING and !!!! at the end of every other sentance to get their point across. I use the exclamtion point when I'm SUPER excited about something!!! :) It usually procedes by a smiley face or an LOL. Am I just taking things out of context and need to be put in my place or can others relate? I have been genuinley afraid to post certain questions on here for fear of getting stomped. I don't do that to others and truly expect the same courtesy. Sorry to get all grumpy, but I have just seent this sort of thing for weeks and weeks and just got my fill today. Thanks for letting me vent! Hope everyone has a great day!! Jules

I just posted on your post on the main board but ya know I have been a victim of being bashed on the main board not here. I know just what you mean. And I agree with you 100%.

Honestly, I have never felt that bashing here, but I believe that you feel bashed.  I agree that this needs to be a supportive and non-judgemental forum.

Oh, I want you all to know I have not seen that on this board. I've seen it on the main board and the Q&A section. Just to clear that up! :)

It seems that the larger the forum the more likely there will be some insensitive people.  When I have a true question or concern, I come to the Indiana board first.  I have never experienced anything but the friendliest, kindest responses here.  If I have a question that goes "beyond borders" I reach out to the RNY board.  I only post to the main board in a dire emergency. I guess I prefer to fish in my own pond... You will always be welcomed and accepted here. 

i am so sorry that someone has done this to you in the main, but here in indiana we dont do that to anyone least i have never seen it. we try so hard to be respectfull of everyone and care what happens to them. i think that is a lot of the reone i hve never posted on the main. i have to many here that care about me and would never think about going to outsiders. you are most welcome to vent or ask anything you need to . most have been there done that and understand and well even if we haveent we are supportive and will lend a helping hand or email address or even a phone number if you just need to hear a voice that cares . even if you dont know them face to face. and well if you dont know us face to face then come to an event we have and meet everyone , let me tell you if you think we are nice on here wait till you meet face to face and see just how kind and loving everyone really is.  and good luck with your fill . i myself had the rny but each is a great tool in its own.  here are some huggs to make you feel better((((((( jules)))))) vicki

Jules,

I'm sorry that you weren't treated with respect on the Main board. I was glad to see your follow-up post on here clarifying that it happened there, not here. Personally, I don't go to any other site, nor any other board. The folks here on the Hoosier board are my family. Period. But I do gotta give you this warning...if needed, I will resort to tough love..but only because I really do care about YOU. Would it be because you ate something not on the 'allowed' list? No. Well..unless you are repeatedly eating M&M's and can't seem to figure out why you don't quit dumping..lol. My tough love is usually geared more toward 'drink water so you don't get dehydrated', 'get your protein in!', 'you gotta do some kind of exercise, even if it's just walking a few minutes a day', 'you gotta take your vitamins!', 'sip, sip, sip!'. In other words..the things your surgeon already told you. If you aren't doing those things and feel like crap, I will resort to tough love if needed to try to help you understand how important those things are. I will always try to say it in a respectful way. On this board, we don't critisize. We aren't food nazi's..and yes, many of us have experienced the food nazi's comments..some even at our own events to which they were GUESTS at! Do like I do..blow them off knowing that they aren't any better than you are! If they want to deprive themself of even a sugar-free cookie for the rest of their life, that's their perogative...and if I prefer to enjoy my life in a safe, healthy, and sugar-free manner, that is mine.  Please feel free to ask any questions you'd like and add any comments you want (as long as they are respectful of others). You are among friends here...ok? Sherri

Hey, I have actually saw what you are talking about on other boards... I always use several !!! and ... when I write, so I mean no harm... really... I dont... and I hope that nobody thinks I bash them... I just want people to lose weight and be healthy... I hope that nobody feels I have been rude... If so I apologize now... On the Indiana board I have recieved nothing but encouragement and support... I hope you feel the same... Well, I hope you have a great day though... Megan

Thank you all so much for your comments and feed back. I really do like this board much better!! Hope everyone is having a great Friday! :) Julie