SCARED

Ok another post on our boards got me thinking about this.   I've woken up early every day this week because I can't sleep.  My hubby has to leave for work early so we've been holding each other for a few moments before he gets up.  He's being exceptionally loving these past few weeks too.  I think he's afraid I'm going to get skinny and leave him.  He doesn't realize he's the best man in the whole wide world!  But that's another topic.

Anyway, each time I've woken up I've laid in bed and thought to myself, "I'm not going to do it.  I'll just call and cancel the whole thing."  I know I'm not the only one with feelings like this.  I also know I won't actually cancel the surgery. My brain is starting to feel the effects of my anxiety.  I've been having dreams about people not wanting to be around me because I'm so fat.  Last night it was the classic "being back in college" dream but this time no one in my dorm would even look at me because I was some freakish huge circus woman.  How's that for stress?!? Oh well...just a few more days and I'll be through it.

Hope the weather is better where you are!

Smooches,

Jacqui

 

Trust and Obey.  I know you are a praying women and you are going into this with His blessing and help.   I understand the support persons feelings because I deal with Becky and try to be an encourager to her and put away my manly ideas and reach out in a manner that would show that I have NO indication that I am interested in straying or finding fault in my spouse. I changed, I am more aggressive in dealing with issues.  I no longer use food to comfort me when things go bad at work or the car needs repair or 100's of other problems that can and will distract. This surgery certainly will allow you a great outreach.  The "Life of Christian Action" talk really fits.  The church people and lay people that see you and the change that you will attribute to God's will can do great things.  You will have the strength to be more active. You are correct.  We could fellowship for hours.  Becky and I would welcome you and your husband and possibly the next Walk give us a heads up and we will try to fit candlelight in... TGBTG To God Be The Glory. E

I hear ya girl!  I myself am begining to feel the effects and the anxiousness of the surgery.  I haven't had any thoughts to back out yet, but I'm sure they will come.  I told my mom yesterday as we were walking through St. V's in Carmel..."Uhhh, I'm kinda scared"...to which she replied, "Good, because now at least you have weighed the good and the bad and you are aware of everything".  Ah, moms are so great. Lucky for me (or unlucky...not sure which) I don't have a fella in my life that is scared that I will leave him, but I think after this is all said and done, and I'm thin and healthy I hope that I can find a man I can love who will love me and accept me.  I think it's really sad to say that I had to go through all this just to have that.  People can be so shallow I guess and that so discouraging. In class, the NP was talking about the feelings of sadness, loss, and anger patients feel right after surgery.  I thought, "not me!", but I know that's not going to happen that way because even as I sit here and think about how people will treat me differently annoys me to no end.  Ya know, I'm still going to be the same person on the inside, why couldn't particular people accept me then as apposed to when I get thin.  Just goes back to people being shallow I guess. Hope you have a great day, and I'll keep ya in my thoughts!

I felt soooo indulgent by having this surgery.  I felt selfish.  How could I do this for ME?  I am the only one who will benefit...How can I make other people worry about me???  Everyone of us has felt the way that you are feeling today.  It's so, so, so normal.   I am a year out, and hubby and I have had a few growing pains.  Everything will work out as it should.   Good luck with your surgery!

Since your surgery is Friday, you need to go to Evansville and eat at Turoni's tonight!!! 

Melanie are you going to be at the exchange on Saturday?

I am!  I am already packed.  Ready to get rid of 16/18's!  Can't wait to see everybody!

Jacqui, Your feelings are very normal, but I know you're going into this fully informed.  After surgery you'll be the same sweet person you are now, just in a smaller body.  Troy is very fortunate to have someone so special.  You can now see why they make us go through the psychological testing prior to surgery.  It's a very emotional and stressful event in our lives.  You'll do fine and as I've told you in my message, you have our phone numbers and you or Troy can call us anytime for anything.  You have more support here than you can even imagine.   Talk to you real soon. Floyd

(( HUGS )) Jacqui  I think everyone gets nervous and all but it will all be worth it in the end!!! Keep your head up.  Everything is going to be just fine :)

My surgery was on a Monday and all day Sunday I kept thinking that I was just going to forget this whole thing. Monday was so busy that I never thought about it again. I know that on Sunday I was thinking this because I was scared. There wasn't time on Monday to be scared. Before I knew it everything was finished and I was on my way to my new life. We get these thoughts because we are human and there is a fear of the unknown. I know that my DH was scared that I was (I guess) just going to up and leave him when this happened. Now he has become my best cheerleader and my little Mother Hen. He knows that together we can get through this and besides I told him I was doing this so we could have a better life together. I told him that I wanted us to go through this hand in hand together just like we have everything all our married life. He seemed to adjust to this whole change better. I also included him and let him know that I need him alot.  I know that things will work out and you will forget all about forgetting about this. God is with you now and He is going to be there with you through the surgery. Just allow Him to help you with all of this. I will keep you and your DH in my prayers about all of this.