A Twist In Life

I'm only sharing this not as to stir sympathy nor call attention to myself but because you are all so near and dear to my heart. Most of you like family. I know that there are several of you I can count on if it absoultely is the need to call on you. Therefore I have VERY important news to share with you loved ones: The Crappy News: I found out that I have cervical cancer. I see a specialist (Ob/Gyn Oncologist) next week to discuss treatment options and to see him often for monitoring while I"m pregnant. Of course they can't do any treatment courses while I'm pregnant. I'll have to wait till after I have the baby to start anything. I've already had my regular Ob/Gyn explain to me wait most likely my treatment options will be but that it was also subject to change depending on what the specialist decides while he is monitoring me. I"m scared as hell. My biggest fear after having Gage was not being around for him. Even though I know he grown (though never mentally nor emotionally because of his disabilities) and I know I WILL recover from this.... the fear that I won't be around for him or the new baby is now larger then life. I'm not planning on telling Gage what's going on until I absolutely have to. So everyone please watch what you say at the next Clothing Exchange because he will be there (since his step mom and I are hosting it he's planning on going, espically since he know Angie ALWAYS brings shrimp and Sherri always brings something good - his words, hahah). I know that as soon as he hears the word "Cancer" (because of my dad) he'll immediately think the worse. That I"m gonna die. He just doesn't need that stress right now with it not even being a month since his grandpa died. So for now I'm gonna wait.. first to hear from the specialist (who I'll see next Wednesday) and secondly so that I am more composed and informed in order to help him through this. I'd like to pre thank anyone and everyone for the prayers and thoughts during this experience. As I said... my OH family here is very near and dear to me just as my real family is and I love you all very much. Jodi

Jodi, My prayers are with you. I'm finishing my treatments from breast cancer and just believe in God and your doctors. Friends help too. Becky

Jodi, I hear the seriousness in your post and Im sure u are scared to death. Do you know what stage your cancer is in. Im only asking becouse I had a mild form of cervical cancer about 7 yrs ago. I have had 4 surgeries to have it removed. Mine is back again but this time its even a much milder form and my dr says as long as I keep getting it removed that chances are things will be fine. Mine is a very slow growing one so I have to have paps every 3 months and surgery about once every yr or two. At first I thought it was a death sentence. Im still scared everytime I have to go to the dr...and everytime I hear your pap is positive again...we will have to monitor this closely...then in 6- 12 months I know surgery is in my futrue. I will keep u in my prayers I know how totally scarey this is. One good thing for me is becouse of my problems I never had kids...Love them and wanted them but was never blessed with any. So I never had the fear of leaving my kids alone. I have no idea everything u are going thru but If I can help u in any way feel free to email me..even if u just need to vent.

So far (and as much as I can remember) my primary Ob/Gyn is stating that my biopsy (I had it done this past Monday) showed that the lesions were pretty deep and looked aggressive. So that is why she's sending me to the specialist to 1) confirm/get a second opinion and 2) help her monitor the situtation. I'm not to worried about getting seriously ill from the cervical cancer at all, just statistically wise concerned about developing cancer in another part of my body because I have a rather large family history of family members that have died for various types of cancer. I also happen to be one of those people that plan out the worse case scenero "just in case" it really does happen so that I'm not left dumb founded and shocked. So I have one foot in reality and the other on "what if". I'm sure I'll feel better about the situtation after I see the specialist and get more info from him. Thanks Jodi

Jodi, I am so sorry to hear this. I pray that you get some good news when you see the specialist. Perhaps it's as Pam's was and one that is treatable. I'm sure everyone will honor your request and not saying anything at the clothing exchange. I will have to think of something extra special to bring. Have no idea what...but I'll think of something. Does Gabe have any favorites? If so, let me know what they are and I'll see if it's do-able in sugar-free. Sherri

Jodi, I'm so sorry to hear this. I know you have been really up lately with all of the positive changes in your life. I hope after a bit you can go back to focusing on all you have accomplished and how much better your life is now. I have not been through anything like this myself, so I can't pretend to know what you are feeling. I know I would be scared too. Life sure has a way of throwing curve balls Do what you need to do to be able to put the worry about your kids behind you and focus your energy on getting better. My cousin had stage 4 breast cancer and newborn twins. Five years later, still here and healthy as ever and raising her kids. They have come so far in cancer treatments and therapies now. I'm amazed by how many people get past this stage in their life and go on to live a long healthy life. I'm sure by you improving your health over the last 18mos that will help you get through this---there was a greater purpose to you loosing all this weight and getting healthier. Your body is in so much better shape now and will give you strength to fight this. Please keep positive, it truly is the key to fighting and healing. Tania

Jodi Sorry to hear about the cervical cancer. I hope you will have some better info after your appointment next Wed. Thank God that there is so many advanced treatments available these days. Just stay on top of it. Ann and I have added you to our prayer list and will put you on my church list also. I missed when the baby is due. Prayers are also going out for Gage so when you feel the time is right that he will have peace and understanding and stand by you thru all of this. Your Friend and Prayer Partner Papa Dan

I have two due dates for the lil` one. My primary Ob/Gyn (by going by my last menstural date) is saying October 4th. The Specialist they have me going too because of me being high risk (my age and the medication I'm on treating my RSD) says based on the measurements of the baby I'll be due anytime after September 23 rd. So I guess.... either on of those or something inbetween is when the baby will get here. Thanks for the prayers.... Jodi

I am not one of those people that can come up with wonderful things to say and ease your mind, just know I am so sorry, wish you well and you are in my thoughts. Take care, DonnaO

Jodi, we'll keep you and your family in our prayers. Linda Vicory