My "issue" and a warning

Good afternoon Illinois!

Instead of the Roll Call, I wanted to post here as a separate thread.

I know I have been a bit mysterious lately, but I was really in a very, very bad place.  I have developed a SERIOUS alcohol problem after RNY.  Before surgery, when I was much younger, I was a pretty heavy partyer.  I could hang with the best of them.  Once I got pregnant with David, I could take it or leave it.  Leave it was the usual as dirty diapers and hang-overs do not go well together.

Before RNY, I again could take it or leave it.  I certainly did not think I had a problem.  Nor did anyone around me.

After RNY, I did not drink anything for at least 6 months, and then was SO surprised that a half of glass of wine made me tipsy.  Kind of felt good!  Slowly, I drank a little more often and a little more wine.  Fast forward to the past couple of years........Been drinking mostly vodka and LOTS of it.  I have not really known how to stop or get the cycle to quit.

I finally reached out for help and am very grateful that help was offered.  I am still reaching out for help and will check out AA.

NOW.........the WARNING part!  I have been reading a lot of material and also spoke with two doctors that tell me that alcohol dependence is very common after RNY.  It has something to do with the re-wiring of the digestive system and the way our bodies metabolize alcohol.  So...........if you wish to drink, PLEASE do so sparingly as it can really sneak up on you.  Respect the consequences.  I never in a million years thought I would be where I was last week.

If you wish to continue to keep me in your thoughts, prayers, healing energy and all positive things, PLEASE DO!  I have a long road ahead.

If you wish to bash me for any reason, please keep it to yourself.  I am struggling enough.

You know I love you all!

Oh Honey, I feel for you, as you know I have had the same problem, from the sounds of it, not as bad are what you are going through. My choice is Vodka and OJ,  I too like the feeling it gives me, and the problem is that the feeling wares off very fast, unless you keep drinking, are you this way too?

I am not  drinking as much, more when I have the grands LOL, they drive me nuts, and the drink helps me cope with them.

Dawn, I am here for you, call me any time, and when the weather gets better we need to get together.

Stay strong, take one day at a time, dont keep any vodka in the house, and have your friends and family not drink in front of you,

I know it is hard, and you have a great bunch of friends where you live, and they too like to party but for now maybe you could ask them to hold the liquor

take care and take one day at a time.

Your friend,

Beautiful Dawn,

I applaud your forthright warning out of love. 

I haven't had RNY, but the sleeve. A few weeks ago I had a glass of wine and I was so drunk it scared me. My husband and our friend did not believe me when I told them how tipsy I was. I could not drive.

My dad was a very abusive alcoholic and it destroyed our family. To this day, I have a brother who does not have anything to do with any part of our family due to the pain of what my dad did to us; mentally, physically and sexually as kids. I freaked out last week from how that one glass of wine effected me. I have always worried about how alcoholism is inherited. 

I have heard alcoholism is a common occurrence for post WLS patients.  I believe i heard Carnie Wilson also had this problem post-surgery. 

Be well my dear one.

Hugs,

Sharon

Dear Dawn, Thank you for feeling you were able to open up to us. It was a brave thing for you to do.No one will condemn  you for showing this side of you. Everyone has demons of some sort. Personally, I consider both you and Janet personal friends and nothing either of you do will take that away from me. You are both awesome and I know if you have your mind set of overcoming this, you will.

Just remember, we are here for you. You have already started the healing process, by telling us. Take it one step at a time.

Love Ya, and I agree with Janet, it has been to long without getting together.

LISA

Dawn, no bashing here.

What you are going through is called a cross addiction and yes it happens to many WLS patienst of all kinds. Many people turn to sex, gambling, shopping etc. They are replacing the food addiction with another addiction. What is happening is that the alcohol is being dumped into the intestinal tract and is being absorbed into the in blood stream real fast. It might seem to go away real fast but truth be told your BAC is still high if you would blow on a breathilizer.

You have been very brave to admit this and have taken a big step towards getting a handle on this.

Dawn,

I am so proud of you! Taking ownership is the first step. You are so brave! I am honored to know you and to be your friend. You wil deal with this and come out with so much joy and gratitude. There is no doubt in my mind and i will be with you all the way!

Connie

Having had my tooth pulled has really cut back on the "need" for alcohol.  If you ever say you need it they say you are in real trouble.  I likely went 30 years with nothing to drink more than a Christmas eggnog and an occasional half bottle of wine.  When my heath got so bad and I could not get operated on I took the give those who about to die strong drink and followed suit.  It also did not help that I had a pastor who though everyone could drink something called barley green and therefore be following "the" biblical way of eating.  I went to a prayer meeting one Friday night and no one would pray with me because he and I were at odds on that point.  So I left and never went back.  Drinking believe it or not is even more popular here than it is in Texas.  I quit drink and alcohol for four months last year to pay for my daughters wedding but have not found the motivation to do that again yet.  I go to nothing and then just the being a foreigner here gets to me and I start up again.  I look forward to hearing how your AA experience goes.  I should also include that I started a program from Saddle Back because I was dealing with anger over my brothers death and my health issues but that Pastors office was above the room where we met and the the windows had open sound to his office.  He said some things to me he could only have gotten by listening in or by someone in the meetings running to tell.  Every morning I say I am not going to get anything but then these few hours before bed are very hard.

Hey Randy,

Was the program at Saddleback called Celebrate recovery? 

I have a 4 friends who have gone this program and have had great success in their sobriety due to this program. . I believe CR started in Saddleback.

Thanks for sharing your story, it was very thought provoking.

I am so sorry for the experiences you have had in your journey to recovery. 

Hugs,

Sharon

Dawn

I am so sorry this is what you are struggling with.  We all have are issues and problems...and this is a place where we can come for solace and understanding.  As you know my parents were alcoholics and I purposely steered clear of that knowing that this kind of thing runs in families and I would be very suseptible.....but addiction comes in all shapes and forms (I wish someone had warned me of that).  And I am realizing that more and more.  I spent so much of my life hating alcoholics (because of my parents) and the last several years I have realized I am just like an alcoholic.  So sweetie...there is no judgment from me...ever.  Who am I to judge anyone...especially someone as wonderful as you!!!!  Not to mention after awhile I had to let go of that anger and hate from my childhood it was eating away at me. 

May I suggest that maybe your kids should go to Al-Anon meeting...I'm not sure how they are aware of what was going on, but they might get some good out of the meetings if they knew drinking was going on.  Here is a linkhttp://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

 I am glad you finally reached out for help and I will be here when you need to cry, rant, celebrate...and I will pray God will grant you lots of strength and love (for your self).

Make sure you come around and keep in contact with us.  Love ya

Dear Dawn,  Of course you will be in my prayers for all positive things to come to you. I had been reading all these post since I got my lap band and feel a kinship with you. Your recipes, tie dying, baking with your daughter, coping in a stressful work environment,your homemade gifts, the style show and that beautiful red dress you are so proud of, you are a good loving person and good times will be yours again.   Your friend Norma     (I'm not a stalker, just timid on my computer use)