HELP ME PLEASE

HELLO ALL!! I AM SITTING HERE BECAUSE THINGS HAVE BEEN HAPPENING TO ME IN THE MONTHS FOLLOWING MY DECISION TO HAVE WLS. I AM SCHEDULED TO GO IN ON MAY 18TH BUT I AM HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS. IS THAT NORMAL? I HAVE MY HOSPITAL/PHARMACIST/SURVEY/PICTURE TOMMOROW AT 1PM AND I HAVE TO GIVE UP $250 TO THEM. IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MONEY THOUGH. I AM REALLY WONDERING IF I HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE AFTER SURGERY. I CHOSE GASTRIC BYPASS BECAUSE I LIKE THE FACT THAT I WILL DUMP AND THAT GIVES ME SOME KIND OF SECURITY THOUGH I AM FULLY AWARE THAT THIS IS ALL ON ME. WHAT I CHOSE TO DO AFTER SURGERY WILL DETERMINE IF I FAIL OR SUCCEED. I AM SO AFRAID RIGHT NOW AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO. I HAVE RESEARCHED THIS PROCEDURE AND THE THINGS SURROUNDING AND I COULD PROBABLY TEACH A CLASS ON IT BUT I JUST DON'T KNOW. I HAVE ALL THESE NEGATIVE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE WHO FEEL THE NEED TO REMIND ME THAT I HAVE TO EXERCISE AND TRYING TO TELL ME WHAT I HAVE TO DO AS IF I DON'T KNOW AND IT IS BULL**** THE ONLY PERSON WHO I GET SUPPORT OUTSIDE OF YOU GUYS IS MY HUSBAND AND MY KIDS AND NOW I AM BEGINNING TO DOUBT MYSELF.

 Take a deep breath.  It is normal to have doubts, especially as the date moves close.  This is a major life changing event.  Just one question.  Who are you doing this for?  If the answer is for yourself, then ignore all those outside comments from those busybodies who have many opinions because they are only that -- opinions.  

I trust you did not come to the decision to have this surgery on a whim.  For me, it took me 5 years to make this decision and I would now do it again in a heartbeat.  No, it is not fail proof, you have to do your part as well.  But, it is well worth it.  IF you are willing to make the commitment, then this will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself.  I feel it was well worth it.  I have no regrets.  Yes, I had plenty of doubts beforehand but I was doing it for me and decided it was the best decision for me.  I do not regret it.  

Only you can answer this question but trust in your inner instincts and your reasons for wanting this surgery.  

Please don't listen to others. That is the worst thing you can do. Who are you having WLS for? It is for you. You chose this for a healtier life, and how you want to live the rest of your life. Don't let others sway your desision. Everyone has second thoughts. But, I will let you in on a little secret, you will feel elated when the first person tells you that it looks like you lost weight. Also when one of the naysayers agree you look good.

We are here rooting for you.

Hugs
LISA

I completely understand. I am having my surgery the day before you are. I am so scared, nervous, anxious and excited all at the same time. I too worry that I will not be successful as I have friend who gained her weight back.

I keep telling myself that this is the best thing for me and I remember the relief that I felt when I finally made this decision. We will get through this together and come out better than ever.

Take Care,
Jennifer

THANKS LADIES, I REALLY APPRECIATE ALL YOUR SUPPORT. IT'S A SHAME THAT I HAVE TO GET MY SUPPORT FROM OTHER PEOPLE BUT I GUESS WE ARE OUR OWN GROUP OF PEOPLE AND NO ONE UNDERSTANDS UNLESS THEY HAVE GONE THROUGH IT OR ARE DOING SO RIGHT NOW! I FEEL A LOT BETTER. YOU ALL HAVE HELPED ME TO REMEMBER WHY I AM DOING THIS.

Nancy, Lisa and Jennifer thank you all for not taking what I said out of context and supporting me with your advice. I am so sorry all of that happened when you were kind enough to respond and help. I am just sol glad there are some kind,understanding smart people out there. Thanks for reading the entire post!!!

Nervousness is normal.

I know you've done your research, but I just want to make sure you understand something vital...not ALL people with gastric bypass actually dump. It is something like only 30%.

You are going to have to find it within yourself to stay away from the things you "should not" have as a person with a gastric bypass. Plus, those who dump, do not all dump on the same things. Some dump on fat, some sugar, etc.

You may want to ask about dumping on the main board. Some of the people who actually DO dump still arrange their lives so that they can eat what they want and still "safely" dump.

For example, there was one guy at the Illinois Obesity Help conference last year (he was the emcee) who said he would go to his room with the food he wanted to eat (cake, cookies, etc) and put the garbage can next to him and eat to his heart's content until he started dumping. He would get nauseous, sweaty, heart racing, puke, etc. and then pass out on his bed. People in the audience laughed (I could not because it sounded awful to me) and then he said "you know you've done it, too" and lots of people in the room nodded.

My point is, don't rely on the fear of dumping to keep you on the straight and narrow. You may not be a dumper and if you are, you may be one of those who plays through the pain (and derails your success).

Dumping scared the hell out of me, even though I knew it was a long shot that I would be a dumper. So I got the duodenal switch instead. Now I know I won't eat something that could cause me to become incapacitated for even a minute, since I take care of my young children and my disabled husdband.

Best of luck to you.

Nicolle

I understand what you are saying but that is the reason why I said I CHOSE GASTRIC BYPASS BECAUSE I LIKE THE FACT THAT I WILL DUMP AND THAT GIVES ME SOME KIND OF SECURITY THOUGH I AM FULLY AWARE THAT THIS IS ALL ON ME. WHAT I CHOSE TO DO AFTER SURGERY WILL DETERMINE IF I FAIL OR SUCCEED.

Yet you say " I CHOSE GASTRIC BYPASS BECAUSE I LIKE THE FACT THAT I WILL DUMP AND THAT GIVES ME SOME KIND OF SECURITY."

I was just pointing out to you, and newbie lurkers, that it is NOT "a fact" that you will dump. You simply do not know until you are post-op. AND, even if you do dump, it does not seem to deter many people for very long and they work around it.

I hate to say this to ANY human being on this earth, but since you want it so badly, I hope you are a dumper.

Nicolle

I also said that I know it is all on me and what In chose to do after surgery and it is up to me whether I succeed or fail or did you not read the entire message you stupid ass rude *****!! I came on here for some advice and support not some ******g know it all rude as **** to be said to me who the **** do you think you are ***** you dont know me but if you would like to let me know. Worry about you and your ****** family!! sound like you need to be!!