How d you tell your friends & family.

The only people who know I am getting surgery is my husband and my dad.  I know that everyone else will only point out the negative about the surgery and will ask "why" & "are you sure?"  I was thinking about not even telling anyone but my husband.

EVERYONE in my family is overweight although a few have lost a large amount of weight with hardwork without the surgery. 

I was just curious if anyone else had trouble telling their family.

 Everyone is different.  I really dreaded telling my mom and one day we were sitting and talking, and I took a deep breath and told her.  I was so surprised at her reaction!  I had really expected her to be against it but she wasn't.  It turned out that one of her friend's grandson's had had the surgery so she even knew something about it! 

I was pleasantly surprised when I talked to my family and friends.  I did not get as much negative comments as I thought I would.  I don't know if it was how I presented it or not.  

I had chosen not to tell one sister because she had a very negative attitude about the surgery as we had talked about this type of surgery in general, not for me, and she was dead set against it.  She is very opinionated, so I decided to not tell her until it was all over or just before.  It turned out that she found out any way, and was actually kind of hurt that I had not told her.  She ended up being my biggest supporter!  

A lot of negative attitudes come from not being educated about the procedures.  I found it extremely helpful to gather some information and make sure that I shared this information when I told my family.  It helped dispel any preconceived misinformation that they had or incorrect theories that they believed.  Everyone seems to know someone who knows someone who's cousin or best friend died from this surgery.  You will hear that story many times.  Chances are, if it did happen, there were extenuating cir****tances in which the patient was a very high risk patient and/or were non compliant in the aftercare and following doctor orders.  Yes, it does happen, but it is a very slim minority.  Check your surgeons mortality rate.  It it is high, I would be choosing another surgeon.  

Good luck!  

I also told everyone. If there was a negitive comment, I said everyone was different, and since this was my decision only, As far as people that said they knew or knew of someone dying from it. I told them that that was more isolated then the norm, and if someone did die, it was usually because they had other issues. I also told them that they could be run over by a truck, but that didn't keep them from crossing a street.

I LOVE MY BAND!!!!

Good Luck,

LISA

Hello

I told everyone.  All my famly, friends and co -workers all know.  Surprisingly I haven't received any negative comments.  Everyone is very supportive.  I know I am lucky....but when I decided to tell everyone I didn't know how they were going to react.  I took a gamble.  Especially with my sister, I know she has negative feelings but she keeps them to herself.  The most negative comment I have gotten from someone a coworker made a comment about how I have it easy to lose weight and she is doing it the hard way.  I told her when she had more than 20 pounds to lose then we can talk.  

I have been blessed with people in my life that are very good to me 

 I told the people I felt comfortable telling and it was fine.  I did have two people tell me they didn't think it was a good idea but that they would support me. As they said this out of genuine concern and care for me I was not offended.  Just keep in mind some people may have strong negative comments and all you can do is let them know that you made this decision and it's the best decision for you.  

Overall for me it's been a great positive response, and if they talk about me behind my back well who cares? LOL!

Lourdes

personally i only told my mom and a few close people, i am going to let it be a suprise

I told everyone and anyone. I was proud of my decision to save my life. Those who know me well know that I researched the living hell out of my options and knew I did not take this lightly.

If you think it's tough to tell them about YOUR surgery, imagine telling them about MINE. Not very many people in the general public has heard of the duodenal switch, and when they hear "malabsorption," they kind of freak. So I had a major education curve to help them climb! They all thought I was getting "Carnie Wilson/Al Roker/Ann Wilson/Randy Jackson's surgery." I had LOTS to teach them about restriction, malabsorption, regain rates of the top 4 procedures, etc!

It was worth doing, because they almost all 100% behind me and I have had just had one on the fence person. She is hanging on by a toenail. I may push her off soon!

Be sure and thoroughly educate the people in your immediate circle. They will draw on that knowledge when they have doubts or concerns. Take them to a meeting with you doc, if you can. My hubby came with me to meet my surgeon and visit our support group. It was great.

Nicolle