I have failed

James, Everyone on this board is just too nice. I'm afraid that I can't be. You need a kick in the pants! But I do have to commend you on a couple things. First, you are taking the blame. You didn't say that the surgery failed you or that it didn't work. You said that you failed. Actually, that isn't correct. You haven't failed but you are well on your way if you don't make some changes & do it fast. Second, you are honest. You didn't come here & say that you don't know why you have gained. You didn't claim to be abiding by the rules & not snacking. You admitted to eating things you shouldn't. We all do that at some time. Heck, today I saw cream puffs at HyVee & had to have one. I figured I'd take a couple bites & throw the rest away. Then I discovered that I couldn't buy just one. They came prepackaged in packs of 2 so I got two. Well, I snarfed down the first one & since I didn't want to litter on the way home that meant I'd be taking it home. Now I'm stuck. If I bring home the package with just one cream puff my husband will know that I ate a whole cream puff. What can I do? You guessed it... I snarfed it down too! Two cream puffs made with cream & sugar & who knows what else. Probably 500 calories apiece! Oh, did I ever feel like crap, both physically & mentally. But you know what? I won't do that again! You tell us that meat hits your stomach like a rock. Have you checked into that? Have you checked with your surgeon? You may have a stricture preventing it from going through or maybe you just aren't chewing it well enough. I am 17 months out & only recently have I been able to eat steak & some meat still makes me a bit uncomfortable at times. Has that always been the case? Are you trying to eat large amounts of meat like you do everything else? Meat is definitely denser than cookies & will feel different in your stomach. Since it is more solid, it will take longer to digest. It will make you feel full or possibly uncomfortable much longer than cookies & pies, sweets, etc. You say you loathe drinking water & other liquids. Didn't your surgeon explain that you will need to drink lots of liquids for the rest of your life? Don't you realize that it is important to you losing weight and keeping healthy? This is just one more way you are sabotaging yourself. You don't have a choice! You must drink your fluids, whether you like it or not. I agree with the others. You need help. Please call your surgeon & explain what has been happening. You will not be not the first. Your surgeon can help you & can direct you to a dietician who can help you make better food choices. I suspect that you were on a plateau a few months ago when you decided that your loss was done. Maybe it had just slowed down. I still don't understand how our bodies can hang onto the weight when we eat so little, and the right things, and exercise. I have only lost about 25 lbs in the last 8 months and I rarely make mistakes like I did this morning. I exercise almost everyday, drink my water, get in my protein. I follow my doctor's program but the lbs stay on. Has my body won the battle? Absolutely not! I am not giving up like you have appeared to do. This is too important to me & I don't intend to fail. I may never make it to my doctor's weight goal for me but I will be healthy and I have no intention of being one of those who lose only to gain it back. I guess it's a choice, huh? You have chosen to go back to the unhealthy way of eating that got you into this condition in the first place. You know better than to eat a whole bag of Oreos! Do you really need to eat a "ton of food"? You may have stretched out your pouch but not that much. You are abusing it by eating more than you need and you don't need to eat lots of food. Remember, this surgery only changed the size & function of your stomach. You have to make lifestyle changes so that the changes the surgeon made will help you to lose the weight. It's is not miracle surgery! You have to take control & be responsible for the choices you make. You have to work with the surgery not against it. You know, I wasn't going to respond to your post. I figure that I may be a bit blunt & some may feel I am too hard on you. I actually turned the computer off to prevent me from posting. Then when I got to work I read your follow up post & lost it. I understand your frustration but really is the biggest frustration the extra skin? Shouldn't it be that you are regaining the weight you worked so hard to lose? The 45lbs that you have gained probably don't show much yet but keep it up & you won't have the extra skin problem anymore. That will be the least of your problems. Yes, the extra skin is awful but you do have a long ways to go. Having it removed too soon is a waste of money. Believe me, from one who has had the surgery, you don't want to have it done twice if you can avoid it. But you don't have to get down to your goal weight to have it done if you really insist on having it. Get back on track & get that 45lbs back off & then consult with a plastic surgeon. You'd be surprised to find out that he may be willing to do it. I know of several people who had it early because the large amount of extra skin made it difficult to get around & to find clothes that fit. Having the abdominoplasty early will affect how you look once you lose more weight. You will have extra skin again but not as much. It may be necessary to repeat the surgery but if it bothers you so much, it may be worth it to you. But, don't worry about that now. Call your surgeon. Get rid of the Oreos & other snack foods. Start making better food choices, get in your protein, & drink your fluids. We don't want you to fail! Failing is something we all have experienced so many times over the years trying to lose weight. You are living our nightmare! We all fear losing our excess weight & gaining it all back. Everyone of us knows many people who are watching & waiting for us to gain it back. We have to work everyday to prevent that. Please do something. Don't give up! Dixie