Depression and Suicide attempt....

Hi Janet, I'm so sorry to hear that you have been so down. I'm very glad that you got help and are learning to cope with this. I don't have alot of wonderful advise for you, just wanted to let you know that there are lots of people out there who care. Hang in there! You can do it, you've just went through one of the hardest journey's you'll ever do. Take Care, Debi

I just need you to know a few things, okay? I have been there. I have plenty of scars on my left wrist and arm and I still can't swallow pills without gagging. Depression for me has been constant since I was 16. My first suicide attempt was when I was 22. I had stitches and they admitted me for a few days. Second time, they almost lost me. That actually didn't scare me. What I was scared of was my lifestyle and the people that surrounded me. I had always been a "cutter". I have been on several anti-depressants but Effexor has been my savior - that and my husband. I have not cut myself since we met in 2001. Now I have a 2 year old little girl and a wonderful home and family. HOWEVER, I do not like the way I look. I do not like the fact that I can't go outside and play with my daughter because I get so out of breath. I hate not being able to take the laundry upstairs. My self-esteem and financial concerns are the only things that really get me down anymore. I think you have to find the one thing that truly allows you to just feel happy. If not "happy" then at least comfortable. I hope you understand what I mean. Anyway, I'm here if you need someone to talk to. I haven't had surgery yet and I am very anxious but scared as well because I don't want to become so depressed again. I'm just hoping that this will improve my emotional state instead of ruin what I've created thus far. You take care of yourself!! I'll be thinking about you!!! Hugs, jen

Dear Janet, You are right, there isn't anything to be ashamed of. I'm proud of you that you could admit you didn't have all the answers. I have a friend who has been dealing with this also. Like I tell her, open up to the therapist - you have to get to the bottom of what is really bothering you. It may be a really slow process, but don't give up. The greatest gift you can give is by really taking therapy to heart and working thru whatever is the real problem. You have been a constant source of encouragement to me and others on this board. And we appreciate it. Take care of yourself right now and don't be afraid to ask us for help. I'll pray for you. Hugs, Lyn

Hello Janet~ I didn't know what to say! I feel for you and I will be praying for you! I too deal with depression and have since highschool.....I have been on meds for years! They are my savior. I think you blame yourself way to much.....the surgery is a life changing surgery, sometimes for the better sometimes for the worst! I don't think you give yourslef enough credit!! You need to be happy for you first.....You need that to be a good mom, wife, friend, whatever.....but you need to be okay for you the most!!!! I know when I am not happy my whole family suffers! It sucks sometimes having everyone need us all the time, we never get ourselve time.....when we finally take some, then we are made to feel guiolty and bad.....we all need to work in finding a happy medium......Anyways~I hear ya and I am here for you!!! Take Care Jesi