bawl baby

I am a huge wuss. My husband works weekend package at Mercy, so I am left to deal with meals for the kids all weekend. I have been ordering out for them, or letting them make some frozen foods so i don't have to be the one dealing with the food. I just can't hack it yet. During the week, my husband does the cooking, making wonderful foods for the family, since my surgery. Tonight he announces they are all going out for dinner at our Chinese restaurant. I was jealous, and mad and wanted to bawl. In fact, I did bawl. I can barely eat anything and they are going out for Chinese, my favorite foods in the world. I know this is all very irrational, and they need to eat, but I wanted to go with them. Eating is how we recreate. (This is why I am fat, obviously). I just feel decent now, and the urge to return to "normal", which means lots of eating out and overeating in general, has been overwhelming the last few days. I had a big tantrum. They went after I got calmed down, and now I feel dumb for being such a baby. But this is so hard. I wanted to go too. sniff, sniff. jean

Couldn't you have gone along & ate something? Even if it was just egg drop soup you'd still recreate. You need to learn how to live with your new pouch in the world or you'll be very miserable. Now, if you are not yet able to eat anything, then that's a different story. This isn't a criticism. I feel bad for you. Dixie

Jean, I can understand your pain. I have been there and in time you will be able to eat those foods again. I went through the same program you did and I am able to eat those foods again. It just takes time. I know in the beginning it doesn't seem like that time will ever get however, it does come very fast. Please hang in there and things will get better. If you like egg drop soup your hubby could have brought some of that home and you could have sipped on the broth part for now or any of the other chinese soups that you like. I remember those days very well It does get better, trust me. Stephanie

Jean, I can understand your pain. I have been there and in time you will be able to eat those foods again. I went through the same program you did and I am able to eat those foods again. It just takes time. I know in the beginning it doesn't seem like that time will ever get however, it does come very fast. Please hang in there and things will get better. If you like egg drop soup your hubby could have brought some of that home and you could have sipped on the broth part for now or any of the other chinese soups that you like. I remember those days very well It does get better, trust me. Stephanie

Jean- Don't feel bad! We all go through it. You are mourning the loss of food. It is completely natural. You are changing your relationship with food and that takes time. Food is very much mixed up with emotions. Most overweight people eat as a way with dealing with emotions. Eat when you're sad, eat when you're happy, eat when you're bored etc etc. You will get to a point where you can have what I call "a skinny person" relationship with food. You will actually forget to eat sometimes! You will not eat breakfast while thinking about what you're going to eat for lunch! You will leave food on your plate! But all these things take time. I know it's hard but try to be patient. Hugs- Melissa