pre-op jitters

I am planning on having WLS late Jan/early Feb 2005. No dates yet finalized, but should be soon. I am nervous about what I presume to be typical concerns. I obviously have food issues or I wouldn't be here, so I am very concerned with life post op. The last thing I want to do after surgery is lose all the weight just to gain it back. There are so many things that I want to do - I'm sure it was/is like that for a lot of you. I am also concerned about my work situation. I am co-owner of a business with three other partners and taking time off just isn't a thing that we do. I have also heard these "caring professionals" say not so nice things about others in our community who have had this surgery - so needless to say - they don't know that I'm having it yet. I am planning on just taking the time off, without explanation. Although, I expect to have to explain myself soon. I also have a very public job and worry about the public perception of this being "the easy way out" - even though I know full well that it is not. I WANT this to be a lifestyle change - I want to be more of an active part in my niece and nephew's life, I want to travel, I want to LIVE a life instead of watching life, I want to be active. I just worry about how all of these changes will really affect my life. I go for some final pre-op testing on Monday and then my final consult and setting surgery date. Any words of advice, warnings, etc? Thanks so much. I plan on having surgery in Cedar Falls with Dr. Glas**** lap RNY.

J,. Wow, you are having jitters that are normal for all of us. The decision to have surgery is never an easy one. And then you have to choose whether or not to let others know and if so, how. I tell everyone, however, a friend of mine is very secretive and has told no one. I commend you on taking the first steps in a wonderful journey. Know that we are here for you. God bless, Andrea

Want to welcome you first of all. Like Andrea said we all go thru the same thing. One lady did say to me something to the effect of taking the easy way out. I looked at her & said are you crazy??? Easy??? She had lost a bunch of weight "on her own" BUT I saw her the other day & guess what? She's just as heavy as what she was before if not heavier!! It's human nature I think to feel as if we have to justify ourselves & that's not true! You are doing this for you to be healthy. A suggestion is to read thru our profiles, you will learn more that way & you will find that we all had our concerns. If you choose to tell or not is up to you. A lot of people say they are having gallbladder surgery then tell of WLS afterward. Keep in touch & feel free to ask away any questions you have. We are here for you Carolyn

Welcome to the boards....We have all had the same feelings that you are having, so you are not alone! PPL that say this is the "Easy way out" have no clue what they are talking about. It is a lifestyle change! Whether you choose to tell anyone about your upcoming surgery is up to you, just know that you are not a failure for choosing to have this surgery! Hang in there and keep us updated, Janet S

Congratulations on making your decision. It is a very big one to make but one that most of us have never regretted. Congratulations also with going to a wonderful surgeon. Several of us on this board had Dr G for our surgeon. He is very skilled, compassionate, and genuine. Since you have your appointment tomorrow you are very close. Any chance that you will make it to the support group meeting on Monday night, 1/3/2005? It's at Sartori from 7-8:30. There is a half hour Q&A session at 6:30 where Angela answers our questions. This month's subject is When Exercise Doesn't Cut It - Plastic Surgery Options presented by Dr. Deniz Bastug, M.D. Hopefuly the weather will cooperate because I am very anxious to hear about PS & I know the meeting will be very well attended. If you do come be sure to introduce yourself to the noisy ones. Mention that you are the one from this board & we'll introduce you around. When you are at your appointment on Monday be sure to look at the scrapbook. Then you will recognize us at the meeting. Also there is a yahoo group made up of mostly Dr G's patients. It's a great place to ask questions about the way he does things & to get support from local people. We also try to get together once between support group meetings for extra support. We do this on the 3rd Sunday night at Bishops in Waterloo. It's a small group but very supportive & we have made lots of friends who know what we are going through. If you are interested in joining the Yahoo group send an e-mail to [email protected] and she will get you set up. Feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions. Dixie

A lot of folks who have the surgery and don't want people to know give the gallbladder out excuse!!! And you don't have to lie afterwards.....Tell the truth, you are changing the way you eat.....end of story, there is know lying about that, you will be changing the way you eat for sure! Take a yogurt to work for lunch, or apple slices and peanut butter, or string cheese, you will look like an average dieter! There are a lot of issues I still deal with.....I am a big emotional eater, still am But I work on it everyday, as you will have to also! My biggest reccomendation is to stay away from bad habits as long as possible, start the new eating habits and stick with them......if you have trigger foods, stay away from them as long as possible......I am a total CARB JUNKIE....when I eat them I crave them for days and eat like crap......carbs go down very easy!!! So for me, if I let myself, I could snack all day long It is a challenge! And of course remeber we are all here if you need advice or anything else! Take Care and Good Luck Jesi

Congrats on your life style change! That's really all it is... a lifestyle change. I don't plan on telling folks that I had this procedure done mostly because I feel it isn't anyone's business. Some of my family knows that I had it done, but not all of them. You'll decide what feels best for you and whatever your choice, it's not wrong. As for recovery time - those lap rny's seem to have quicker bounce back times for patients. I heard that they are very successful at them in Cedar Falls. Everyone recovers differently. I keep reminding myself of that as I am in recovery - only 6 days out. The best advice I can give you is that the emotional issues with food do not magically go away after surgery. This may seem obvious but I am six days out and DREAMING about food. I constantly stop myself and ask "what is this really about?" and I can usually discern that I need comfort. There is as much emotional legwork as there is physical work, but that is what makes this lifestyle change so effective for folks. You have a wonderful support system here. I wish you the best of luck but you won't need it. Just stay fierce!

J, Welcome..... I am one of Dr G's pts. My surgery date is next Monday the 10th. I THOUGHT that I had worked through a lot of 'mental' questions but the closer 'the day' gets, the worse the head games get. Some times are tougher than others. I am 1/2 way through the liquid diet he requires. It is not easy. It has really triggered how important food was/IS to me, creating a whole host of questions and concerns. As for telling people, all my coworkers know, and are VERY supportive. My parents and all of my siblings know, and are super supportive. I have also told a couple of close friends. I have not made it a point to broadcast that I am having surgery, as part of me feels that it is nobodys business. And part of me does not want to be judged afterward. ONE of my many weaknesses, (for lack of better term) is caring what people think about me, but I am working on that. You have come to the right place for answers and suggestions. And they have a way of 'drawing you out'......I used to be a terrible lurker. Hugs Sheila

Hi Renee: Nice to meet you. Wow, I remember going through those pre op jitters. Looks like your perfectly normal. You need to do what is right for you. You already know this is not easy. I've chosen to be very open about my surgery, I tell everyone, because I hope it will help get rid of the stigma. But my choice is not for all. You do what you need to do to get healthy. All of your options above are viable ones. I can tell you that I'm grateful that I had my surgery. I still struggle with food challenges but I have alot more success than I used to. I am 10x healthier than I was last Feb. I have at least 3x the energy, no more CPAP machine, no more asthma drugs and I sleep like a baby at night (this used to be a rare occurance.) Oh, yeah and one of the horrible side effects include shopping in the petite departments instead of Lane Bryant. Good Luck on your journey and God Bless, Eileen

Hi J, I also had Dr. Glas**** My surgery was almost 3 months ago. I did not tell a lot of people before hand. I am not sure why....maybe because I thought it was the easy way out also. But then I reminded myself of all the times I tried weigh****chers, TOPS, low carb diets, starving myself etc. I also thought about the Diabetes and other health issues I was facing. My choice was continue with the weight I was and continue struggling to get my health issues under control OR to use another tool to help me control it. I chose to have the surgery because I want to LIVE. Not just breathe and have an existence, but to LIVE. I knew this tool would be the one to help me gain control. With each step of the "getting approved" stage, I never once doubted my decision. I only told my closest friends. My family didn't know until 2 weeks before the surgery and my older brother, not until the day before surgery. I knew that any doubts from others could possibly affect my confidence in this surgery, so I only told a few people. I also heard some co-workers talking about people who had this surgery and they also said it was the easy way out. My co-workers knew I was having surgery, but not what kind. Surgery went well and I was back to work in 2 weeks. I KNEW I had made the right decision.....and now I wasn't afraid to tell anyone. I know that some of the people I tell will think it's the easy way out, but it isn't. If anyone ever says that to my face, then I have a standard answer prepared "You might think it's the easy way out, but you walk in my old shoes for a day and then my new shoes for a day, and then you can tell me how EASY it is. This is a definite life style change. You can ask me or you can ask any of my family or friends who have watched me change my lifestyle in the last 3 months. We are all here for you.