WARNING, huge VENT going on here....

I am so infuriated with a subordinate at work this week I could SCREAM. This woman is about a size 3-4X. Before my surgery she was always all up in my face telling me how DANGEROUS it is, and that I probably wouldn't make it, blah blah blah. NOW, she is up in my face almost EVERY DAMN DAY asking me how much weight have I lost now, and she'll run her hands stright up and down and go "it's going down, it must be working!" ...she then will go on to tell me AGAIN about the 30 pounds she has lost....she has been yo yoing the SAME 30 pounds for the past 2 years. She says, yeah, it has been hard, but at least I am not taking the easy way out!"!!!!! My initial response is "I sure as hell hope it is working, I didn't fork over 75000 dollars for NOTHING! " AND "if you consider having 5 1in*****isions made in your body, your stomach cut apart, and 5 feet of your intestines re routed, well, then hell, it is a BREEZE~!!" yesterday she asked me "how much have you lost now"...after I had just told her the VERY DAY BEFORE it was 140 pounds since feb...so I said, probably the same as YESTERDAY Brenda (NOT her real name). She said, "oh, well I was just asking for someone else" to which I replied, "well, you know, they can come ask me themselves if they are that curious!" HOW do I handle this!? It is REALLY grating on my nerves, and seeing how I am her direct supervisor, I HAVE to be cordial to the woman! AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!

well you are nicer than me! Maybe you should take in OH magazine or direct her to OH so she can read for herself. Think she is jealous of what you have accomplished! You know there are people out there that don't like themselves & can't like anyone else either. It would be hard being her supervisor that's for sure. Reading OH she could see how many of us "took the easy way out"!!! Hate people like that. On the brighter side CONGRATS on your weight loss keep up the good work! Hugs Carolyn

You poor gal....getting picked on everyday at work! You are doing awesome, and like Carolyn said she is probably jealous or something! I have a friend who said I might be taking this to far, trying to make myself happy......blah blah blah! It is crazy how everyone critizises us before hand, and then pester us after the fact!!! I just wish people could be happy for the important healthy steps we are taking for our lives!!! I know for me it would have been much easier to stay fat and miserable....comforting myself with food, and staying reclusive....But I did not take the easy way out......neither did you!!! We risked our lives, to be healthier and happier! We have to plan or meals, take protein supp, vitamin suppl, exercise, for the rest of our lifes......not easy at all!!! But until the world knows more about the surgery and all that is involved, unfortunetly we are stuck to deal with the ignorance!!! Be strong, hold your head up high.....and know we are here to support you!!! You will have to think up a nice response to the silly questions......I like the same as yesterday response.....lol!!!! Good luck and Take Care Jesi

Thanks you guys! The thing is, I am wondering is it me being oversensitive, or is it her being annoying as usual? It didn't used to bother me so much, of course I was the "fattest girl trying to be everyone's friend" Now it is like I don't care if I have any friends or not...I am stressed, and don't know who to turn to because no one else I know has had the surgery that I can talk face to face with about the very real, very emoitonal changes we go through....ESPECIALLY the redeposit of estrogen into our bloodstreams as the fat goes away making us virtual emotional rollercoasters! thank God I can come here and know you all are going, "yep, I know what you mean!"

Tracie, I am so sorry you have to deal with this. It must be very frustrating. Recently, someone asked how to deal with people who ask how much they have lost or how much they now weight. That person felt really uncomfortable telling & didn't know how to answer nicely. Someone suggested that she say something like,"Well, how much do YOU weight now?" or "I'll tell you if you tell me what you weight." Most people are sensitive about that question & woudn't want to answer, especially if they are overweight and would realize that they were asking an inappropriate question themselves. Perhaps it wouldn't help with her as she sounds pretty dense. I do think your response was pretty good. Also when you are tired of her asking all the time, I think I would just tell he that it was my business & when I wanted her to know I will tell her. Perod. Some people just need to have it put very directly. Good luck & I don't think you are being too sensitive. Fortunately, I haven't run into this much. The ones that have asked have been nice about it & the only one so far I don't feel is sincere about it is my MIL, and she's just jealous & I'm sure doesn't like the idea that I am smaller than her & soon will be smaller than her precious "perfect" daughter. (Don't get me wrong, I adore my SIL, It's my MIL who thinks she is perfect & I will never measure up.) Dixie

Hey Tracie you have done WONDERFUL! Some ppl just don't have a clue do they??? I think you are handling this rather well under the cir****tances. I have the same ppl ask me whenever they see me "how much more have you lost" my reply to them is that I feel good, thank you for asking! That Im sure leaves them thinking LOL. So anyway, hang in there girl!!! Hugs, Janet S

Tracie, I am pre op, so I can't put myself in your shoes. However, I thought I would offer you my humble opinion. As a supervisor, or even as a co-worker, you have every right to look her in the face and tell her that your health, including your weight and your choices, is YOUR business, not hers, and tell her she is not to bring it up for discussion again. I understand you wanting to be cordial to her, but she has obviously crossed the line. The more you give her, the more she'll want. Keep your chin up. She is her own worst enemy. As for losing 140 since Feb I have dreams of doing so well! hugs Sheila

Good job on the wt loss! I would tell her that she should back off or you will go to your HR person and complain she is harrassing you!

Tracie, I agree with what Jesi and Dixie said. I would also add that when she says you took the easy way out, I would nicely comment about how much work this actually is. I often say that BEFORE anyone gets the chance to say I took the easy way out. If they say that I look good or ask how much I have lost, I will tell them how much I lost and then I will tell them that it is a lot of work. I will let them know that I have to change my eating habits and still deal with some of the old habits. I remind them that this is the hardest "diet" that I have ever been on - that if I overeat, I get sick, that if my new little tummy doesn't like something, I get sick, that if something doesn't go down right, I get sick. I then also inform them that this is only PART of the healthy lifestyle changes that I have made and others include daily exercise and working out at the gym. Then I say something like, (in an obviously joking manner), "If anyone tells me I took the easy way out, if it's a day when I'm hungry, I would probably bite their head off!) No one comments much after that and we all get a good giggle from it. Hope this helps. God bless, Andrea