Funny!!!!

You know that you are ready for WLS when you know that... 1. "Lap" is more than a dance done at a strip club 2. Wooden spoons are not just for cooking 3. Your cubboards are stocked with baby food but there are no babies in the house 4. OH is a great place to visit, and it is not the buckeye state 5. "Denile" is NOT a river in Egypt 6. "Dumping" is not the same thing as littering 7. "I've got a date" does not mean you are going out with someone 8. "PS" is much more than a post-script 9. Popsickles aren't just for kids 10. Getting to the "other side" has nothing to do with death!

HEHEHEHe Too cute! God bless, Andrea

Tina, You're too much! Did you write this, cause if you did - you need to keep writing. Laughter is one thing everyone enjoys but we don't get to do enough, at least I don't think so! What a hoot! -Deb W.

Can I add to those, Tina? I didn't write these and I am only posting 1 page of 4+. If anyone wants the whole list, e-mail me & I will send it to you. Dixie You Know You Are A WLS Patient When "I have a date" doesn't mean you are going out. You have baby food in the house and no baby. "I'm a loser" is a good thing. All of your silverware says "Gerber" "Welcome to the other side" does not mean you have die. New clothes fall off the next week. You are excited about "hand me downs" The scale at Wal-Mart doesn't say "one at a time please" Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing. Jus****er for me please. Hitting the "Century Mark" is a good thing! You love the taste of Chewable Centrum Rugrats Vitamins or biting the head off of Wilma You can be Touched by an Angel and not be considered crazy. When your rear end doesn't look like a mud slide anymore??? When your excited your incision is only 6 inches When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club!! Other women are calling you "*****" behind your back. When you are glared at in the plus size dept because you really don't belong there anymore! When you really don't have a thing to wear! When you have to prove you are you on your license! When you start being IN the pictures, not behind the camera! Life has new possibilities. You want to hug everyone who is fat and give them your surgeon's card. You are never without a bottle of water. When people look surprised when they see how little you eat. When you know all too well the definition of "dumping". When you can see your feet for the first time in years!! When you order a doggy bag the same time you order your meal. Counting protein grams instead of calories You can say "Oh, I won't have any of that, I'm full" and really mean it Being to small for your britches. When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position in your bra & secure with a pony-tail holder!!! (sorry for the visual guys!) Having someone say, "I can put my arm (not arms) all the way around you!!" When you go to your child's school and the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot! When you go to the mall and you park in the first open space instead of circling for 20 minutes for a spot by the door. When you and your new best WLS friend are planning a date to get belly button rings...(or a tattoo!) You truly are a "Cheap date" and not in the way that some think.....